Of all the crackpot ideas propagated by far-right nutjobs in recent years, one of the most baffling is the supposed "war on Christmas."
As anyone who"s ever worked retail on Thanksgiving or driven past a house with an inflatable Santa on the lawn in mid-October, Christmas in the US is so huge it"s started absorbing other holidays.
And yet, there are those who would have you believe that Jesus, Rudolph, and the rest of the crew are under constant attack from left-wing heathens who want a secular Festivus pole in every home.
See the now-annual Starbucks cup controversy for one of the more absurd examples of this mentality.
Anyway, Evangelical types are particularly excited about celebrating Christmas this year, as many believe 2016 might be the year the birthday boy returns to stomp non-believers under his Birkenstocks, thanks to this man:
Yes, in case you just emerged from your precautionary Unabomber shack in the woods, hoping to see the the words "Madam President" in every headline, we have some distressing news:
Donald Trump has been elected president, and his first order of business is declaring war:
War on the cast of Hamilton, war on SNL, war on reason and civility …
So many big beautiful wars, folks. Really just tremendous wars.
But if you"re wondering how the Orange Menace is gonna find time to fight all these battles, fear not:
He"s just freed up some vitriol by bigly declaring victory in the most important conflict of our time:
“You can say again, ‘Merry Christmas,’ because Donald Trump is now the president,” is something Trump advisor Corey Lewandowski actually said during an interview with Sean Hannity last night.
“You can say it again, it’s OK to say, it’s not a pejorative word anymore.”
You"re right to think that this might be a #Pizzagate-esque fake news story, so here"s video evidence of the yuletide insanity:
