For most of us, the feud between Kim Kardashian and Taylor Swift is a source of endless entertainment.
After all, it’s not every day that two of the most famous women on the planet butt heads in a public forum.
For Drake, however, it’s another source of aggravation in a life that’s already filled to the brim with auto-tuned angst.
You see, Drake is dating Taylor Swift.
Okay, it’s rumored that Drake is dating Taylor Swift, but it’s equally likely that they’re just working on a single that will immediately trigger the tear ducts of all who hear it, resulting in mass emo hysteria, like something out of a horrendous episode of Black Mirror.
Whatever the case, the two are spending a lot of time together these days.
For Drizzy, it’s a way to recover from his breakup with Rihanna and build material for his next heartbroken ballad.
For Taylor, it might be a way to silence her enemies, because Taylor Swift is the blonde Vladimir Putin.
We don’t know for certain that Taylor is manipulating Drake for the sake of her career (We don’t even know for sure if they’re really dating!), but it wouldn’t be surprising if she asked Aubrey to smooth some tensions for her.
Drake is tight with Kanye, which makes sense, as both men are what would happen if your angstiest middle school meltdown became human and built a successful hip hop career.
A source tells Hollywood Life that Taylor was pissed when Kim liked a tweet about a Calvin Harris diss track, and she asked Drake to talk to ask Kanye to have Kim back off.
We know. The plot of The Usual Suspects is less complex than this gossip, but the main thrust is that Drake wants Kimye to quit hatin’ on Taylor:
“Drake texted Kanye and asked him, politely, to tell his girl to back off Taylor,” a source tells Hollywood Life.
“Drake stays on social media like it’s a job and is aware of Kim’s jab. He told Ye that he’s cool with him and Kim, but Taylor could use a little more respect!”
As you may remember, the Kim v. Taylor beef dates back several months to when Swift threw shade at Kanye for rapping about without permission in his single “Famous.”
Kim refuted Tay’s claim by posting video of the rapper asking her to okay the lyric before he recorded it.
“Taylor’s become like his little sister and he’s found himself protecting her and doesn’t think Kim should be petty by trying to get underneath Tay’s skin,” says the insider.
“Drake doesn’t know if Ye read the text yet but he’s definitely asking him and Kim to pump their brakes on the Taylor jabs.”
Yes, it’s possible that Drake is watching Taylor’s back even if they’re not hooking up.
He could be big in helping her rebuild her reputation after a difficult few months.
Perhaps we should all have a kindly Canadian to help us settle our beefs.
Both candidates should be in a rush to be the first one to promise a Drake in every home right now.