Despite his aversion to truth, his ever-changing platform, and the fact that he devoted the last 18 months of his life to stoking the flames of racial hatred, Donald Trump was elected president on Tuesday after receiving only slightly fewer popular votes than Hillary Clinton.
The Donald himself doesn"t know what will come out of his mouth from one moment to the next, so it"s tough to predict what life will be like under his administration.
Fortunately, we"ve combed through Trump"s 319 million tweets (one to insult each person in America!) and found 12 that seem to outline the goals of his first term in office.
Before you fill the comments with death threats – yes, these are fake tweets we wrote ourselves in an attempt at humor.
Of course, it"s worth pointing out that with any other president-elect in history we probably wouldn"t have had to explain that.
Just sayin".
1. Oh, Say Can You Stand?
2. Yo Mama, Obama:
3. Nuke It Out:
4. Mall of America:
5. The Incest Test:
6. Leave Them Kids Alone:
