Wednesday, August 2, 2017

Kendall Jenner Goes Topless to Sell Bottoms

Well … it’s better than Freedom Fries.


Okay, so Kendall Jenner’s latest ad is for something called the Freedom Panty.


And while she’s wearing the panties in question, she’s not wearing anything else. 



Considering how infamously terrible Kendall Jenner’s Pepsi commercial was, this photo that we have below is a huge step up.


In this photo, we see Kendall wearing a pair of red panties and standing to the side, with only her hands to conceal her bare breasts.


The background and makeup and even her hair combine to give it an eery, uncanny valley quality.


You’ll see.


Kendall shared the advertisement on Instagram.


In her caption, she tagged La Perla’s Instagram page.


La Perla’s Instagram page also shared the ad, and included the caption:


“Introducing La Perla’s #FreedomPanty, crafted from the finest French Leavers Lace with interwoven stretch. Shop online and in our boutiques.”


On both pages, this was the photo:



Move over, Madame Tussauds!


We kid — that’s really Kendall Jenner; she only looks like a horrifying knockoff of the original.


It’s part of the style of the photo — matching the way that her skin is made up to catch the light and the unnatural flowers behind her.


(Besides, if Madame Tussauds’ terrible impressions of Beyonce are any indication, they couldn’t make something that looks this much like Kendall)



Usually, Kendall is one of the most likeable of the Kardashian family.


She’s beautiful and she’s less likely to say dumbass things or feud with people.


She also has a real job — modeling — that’s pretty separate from what the rest of her family does.


Lately, however, Kendall Jenner has seemed to be courting controversy at every turn.


Her Pepsi ad was just a PR nightmare, obviously.


Then there were the shirts that she and Kylie tried to market.


(Ugh)


And then, most recently, there was Kendall’s ad where she was smoking.


Smoking is bad for your health and, more importantly, incredibly disrespectful to everyone around you.


So many of Kendall’s fans are young and impressionable and really don’t need to be seeing celebrities smoking in any way that might make it seem cool or sexy.


(Smoking rates keep going down — can we please keep it that way?)


In her defense, Kendall absolutely mentioned in the captions that she doesn’t smoke.


So this looks like another case of her being asked to do something and her accepting the instructions without raising a fuss.


(Just like with the Pepsi ad)


Basically, Kendall’s problem isn’t that she sits around coming up with bad ideas.


It’s that she does her job by going along with other people’s bad ideas.


And we do think that it’s unfair that so much ire is directed at Kendall herself rather than at the people who are actually responsible.



Whether you love Kendall Jenner or can’t stand her …


No matter what you think of the artistic choices in this ad …


(Seriously, why choose such a gorgeous celebrity model if you’re going to give her that uncanny valley look?)


… We can all agree on one thing:


It’s way, way better than that Pepsi ad.



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Justin Bieber Flaunts Cross Tattoo Near His Eye

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Heidi Montag Shows Off HUGE 7-Month Baby Bump!

Seven months into her pregnancy, The Hills star Heidi Montag is still staying active. She’s even keeping up her exercise routines!


She’s shared glimpses of her workouts with followers.


As you can imagine, her baby bump is very much on display.



It’s so nice to see that Heidi and Spencer have come this far in their lives, you know?


It’s been years since the two of them squandered their combined $ 10 million fortune on absurd purchases like pricey handbags and rare crystals.


(Yes, really)


Those were the times when Heidi Montag kept getting worrisome cosmetic procedures (remember her F-cup breasts? Thankfully she got them reduced later), which led to friction between herself and her mother.


As we mentioned recently, Heidi and her mom are getting along better now.


It turns out that The Mother-Daughter Experiment: Celebrity Edition actually helped some people to heal old hurts! Who knew?!


So now, after all of their bonkers misadventures and mistakes, Heidi and Chris are just content being happy with each other as a couple.


And they’re getting closer and closer to welcoming their child into this world.


As you can see from this photo, Heidi is very far along:



She looks great! And check out that baby-bump!


Exercise, within reasonable limits, can be healthy when you’re pregnant.


(Just like it can be healthy when you’re not pregnant)


If exercising makes you feel especially distressed or nauseated during your pregnancy, then cut it out of your routine until you’re no longer pregnant.


(Similarly, if an exercise is putting your body through real hell, don’t do it — no pregnancy required)


Walking and even hiking can be popular non-rigorous exercises during pregnancy.


As always, it’s important to stay hydrated in those cases — even more so than for non-pregnant hikers.


With pregnancy, there’s always a risk that something could suddenly go wrong, so we wouldn’t recommend hiking anywhere that’s more than a few minutes from where a vehicle could easily reach you.


Like, you can just go for a walk around a public lake, ideally with your partner or a walking buddy.


And, of course, your cell phone. Both of your cell phones.


And plenty of water.


We have a feeling that Heidi isn’t overdoing it, here, because she’s clearly very conscious of the strain of working out while pregnant.


Specifically, the ouch factor on her feet and ankles.



As we can see, Spencer Pratt is clearly good husband material.


Foot massages feel weird to some people (and can be torture for the ticklish), but for others, they can be a great source of relief.


Especially if they’ve been walking for two.


And standing for two.


And especially if they’ve been exercising for two.


Speaking of Heidi Montag’s activities, though, have you guys ever heard of a babymoon?


It’s not, like, a type of full moon or whatever.


It’s like a cross between a honeymoon and a baby shower.


That doesn’t necessarily make a lot of sense to us, given that traveling while pregnant isn’t necessarily the easiest thing in the world, but it’s a thing.


Anyway, Spencer and Heidi snapped this photo while on their babymoon in Hawaii.


Even dressed, there’s no hiding that baby bump.



We know that Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag probably wish that they had more of their former fortune to help welcome their child into the world.


But you know what?


This couple seems loving and, despite their histories, well-adjusted.


In fact, their past mistakes might make them wiser people and wiser parents.


We hope so, anyway.



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