Sunday, December 24, 2017

13 Most Memorably AWFUL Movies of 2017


The following movies didn"t merely receive a thumbs down from our staff. 


They received a thumbs WAY, WAY, WAY, WAY down.


These films simply sucked in 2017.


Do you agree?




1. The Emoji Movie


The emoji movie is terrible

“Make no mistake, The Emoji Movie is very, very, very bad (we’re talking about a hyperactive piece of corporate propaganda in which Spotify saves the world and Sir Patrick Stewart voices a living turd), but real life is just too hard to compete with right now.” – David Ehrlich, IndieWire.



2. Jigsaw


Jigsaw

“[it] is one of the better films in the franchise. Unfortunately, that’s not saying much.” – Germain Lussier, io9.



3. The Layover


The layover

“I’d say it’s more like an excruciating, embarrassing, profoundly unfunny, poorly shot and astonishingly tone-deaf screech-fest featuring some of the least charismatic performances this side of one of those dreadful ‘reality’ shows in which over-injected women always seem to be yelling at one another while pouring wine or throwing wine at one another.” – Richard Roeper, Chicago Sun Times.



4. Fifty Shades Darker


Fifty shades darker poster

“Lacking enough chemistry heat or narrative friction to satisfy, the limp Fifty Shades Darker wants to be kinky but only serves as its own form of punishment.” – Rotten Tomatoes.



5. Rings


Rings picture

“Opts for lazy jump scares and a convoluted origins story no one asked for or needed.” – Alex Gilyadov, IGN.



6. CHiPs


Chips still

“The film’s model is—or should have been—the movie version of 21 Jump Street and its sequel, but the co-directors of those bumptious nihilistic undercover burlesques, Phil Lord and Christopher Miller, knew how to turn comedy into suspense and thrills into media-mad absurdity. Shepard just sprinkles overstated banter onto a generic plot and bits of pedal-to-the-metal action, as if he was serving the action-comedy gods by sticking the usual ingredients in a blender and pushing ‘purée."” – Owen Gleiberman, Variety.


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