Wednesday, June 13, 2018

Dennis Rodman Cries Over Trump-Kim Summit, Confirms We"re Living In Most Bonkers Timeline

When you hear the names Donald Trump and Kim Jong-Un, your first thought probably has to do with stocking up on canned goods or making peace with your god.


Your second thought might be something along the lines of, Damn, those dudes are both rocking some almost impossibly sh-tty hairstyles.



So perhaps it should come as no surprise that Dennis Rodman — he who brought the aesthetic of a Hot Topic clerk to the National Basketball Association — should also be involved in the summit taking place in Singapore this week.


Is the Worm still rocking hair colors that make him look like he was recently fired as the bass player Chumbawumba?


Tough to say, as Dennis is rarely seen without his MAGA hat these days.


As you"ve likely heard, Rodman has traveled to North Korea several times, and he"s long been an outspoken supporter of Trump.


So with the help of his sponsor — a virtual currency for cannabis entrepreneurs called PotCoin —  Rodman traveled to Singapore to …



… Well, we"re not exactly sure why he was there, but while discussing his previous forays into foreign policy on CNN, the 57-year-old broke down in tears.


“When I went back home, I got so many death threats,” 57-year-old Rodman cried.


“When I came home, I couldn’t even go home. I had to hide out for 30 days. But I kept my head up high, brother. I knew things were going to change.


“I believe in North Korea,” Rodman then blurted, in case anyone was unconvinced that whoever runs the simulation we call life is currently on a bender.


Depending on your political affiliation, you"re probably saying to yourself either:



"Jeez, the guy feels safer in North Korea than he does at home among the sicko libs!"


Or:


"Yeah, dude, generally aren"t big on sanctioning murderous regimes by partying with psychotic dictators.


Somehow, both sides are both right and wrong.


Don"t ask us to explain that; this situation has caused our brains to leak out of our ears.


Dennis rodman cries over trump kim summit confirms were living i
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