Kylie Jenner Cakes On Makeup, Looks Middle-Aged

The girl isn’t even 19, and she could easily pass for 40.

Not because of wrinkles, but because she wears so much damn makeup.

Kylie Jenner either wants to be transformed back to the ’80s so she can don mink coats and apply four to five layers of heavy Revlon foundation, or she believes all the world is her stage (or probably both).

Fishwrapper first noticed Jenner’s jump from teen makeup entrepreneur to Joan Collins look-alike, wondering why in God’s name anyone would want to press the fast-forward button.

Retain your youth, Kylie! 

Over the weekend, Jenner and on-again boyfriend, Tyga brought his three-year-old son, King Cairo to Magic Mountain, a theme park just north of Los Angeles.  

She also got in some pool time with model Hailey Baldwin.

View Slideshow: Kylie Jenner: 11 Times She Looked Like Your Dad’s New Wife

It was recently revealed that Jenner works with Ukraine-born photographer Sasha Samsonova for her “impromptu” photoshoots.

“She reached out to me about a year ago,” Samsonova told People.

“She found me — she wanted to do a shoot and obviously I really wanted to do a shoot with her. We got together and we did a shoot that came out on her birthday last year. The one with all the colorful wigs. That’s what we did. That was so much fun.

“It was really, really great working together so we just continued doing that.”

Jenner reached out to the 25-year-old via Instagram, and from there it was pure magic.

“She is great. Super creative. I love working with her,” Samsonova said.  “She knows her body well, and knows how to move and what to do with it.”

Samsonova then explain what she thinks makes Jenner such an influencer.

“She has really great taste,” Samsonova explained.

“The coloring is always great. Everything just looks perfect and exactly how it should. I don’t think it’s only about being famous.

“There are a bunch of famous people on Instagram, huge actresses and actors who don’t really have such big followings because their Instagram just looks really random, and they probably don’t take care of it whatsoever — or [they] just don’t know how to take a beautiful photo.

“But on her page you go there and you see everything, and it looks really amazing.”

View Slideshow: Kylie Jenner Selfies: A Kandid Kollection

Iggy Azalea & French Montana: Dating?!

Iggy Azalea and Khloe Kardashian have a lot in common:

Giant, possibly surgically-enhanced backsides; fame and careers that are baffling to just about anyone over the age of 30; and now, seems, similar taste in men.

We knew they both had a fondness for NBA players, but now it looks as though their similar affinities run even deeper than we realized, as they both have a thing for the French.

By which we mean French Montana, of course.

E! News is reporting that Iggy and French (or “Friggy,” as we like to call them) were spotted getting “cozy” at a club in Vegas Saturday night.

Sources say the possible couple spent much of the evening dancing together and then left together at the end of the night.

Iggy, of course, recently broke up with Nick Young after learning that her Lakers guard fiance was basically sexing the entire population of the greater Los Angeles area behind her back.

After she dismissed one cheating scandal, Azalea learned that Young had gotten his ex pregnant while she was out of town on tour.

That’s the kind of thing that’ll mess up any engagement.

Like Iggy, French is a rapper, but he’s best known in celebrity gossip circles for his relationship with Khloe.

Though things obviously didn’t work out between them, Khloe and French’s breakup was surprisingly amicable, and the two of them are reportedly still on good terms.

So maybe Iggy found herself a keeper this time.

Of course, we imagine she’ll have some lingering trust issues to work out after the way things played out with Nick.

That dude did her seriously dirty.

Julian Edelman and Adriana Lima: Dating!

We now know that Tom Brady will definitely miss the first four weeks of the 2016 NFL season due to his Deflategate suspension.

And while most folks in the New England Patriots organization are still grieving over the fact that they’ll be missing one of their team’s two key ingredients (Bill Belichick’s sleeveless hoodies have not been banned by the league … yet.), wide receiver Julian Edelman seems to be loving life these days.

Of course, that could have little to do with his hopes for the Patriots’ season and everything to do with the fact that he’s banging a Victoria’s Secret model.

Yes, according to TMZ Edelman and Adriana Lima are dating.

It’s great news for him, because, well … Adriana Lima looks like this:

But it’s not great news for Pats fans, as no one can be bothered to worry about catching footballs when they’re regularly having sex with Adriana Lima. It’s not possible.

Sure, Brady’s been married to a supermodel for years, but he was grown in a lab using shards of Joe Theismann’s fibula.

The guy’s thought about nothing but football his entire life.

With Edelman, we’re dealing with an actual human being.

If he can get over the fact Lima may have banged Justin Bieber, this could turn into a serious relationship, while may mean the end of his career. 

Of course, on the bright side, this could also mean an end to Edelman’s random Tinder hookups and embarrassing post-coital selfies posted by over-zealous fangirls.

We feel like Rob Gronkowski already has the task of sexing the entire population of Massachusetts well in hand, ya know?

Taylor Swift: Asking Instagram For Help Dealing With Haters?

The past two weeks have seen one PR nightmare after another for Taylor Swift.

In the wake of being called out by Kim Kardashian and slammed in an angry Twitter rant by Calvin Harris, the singer disappeared from social media altogether for a few days.

Taylor returned to Instagram over the weekend, but it seems that after wishing her friend Selena Gomez a happy birthday, she made another quick exit.

Sources claim Taylor didn’t like what she saw when she waded back into those dangerous waters, and we can’t say we blame her.

No, we’re not talking about the photo of Kim and Calvin Harris that went viral last night (although she probably wasn’t thrilled by the sight of that either), we’re talking about the slithering banes of Indiana Jones’ existence:

Yes, snakes.

Or more specifically, snake Emojis, which were just about the only thing you’d see in the comments section of Taylor’s IG page last week:

It seems fans of Calvin, Kim and Katy Perry (along with people who just flat-out don’t like Taylor) have been flooding her comments with a biblical plague of slithering serpents.

But while us average shmoes just have to suck it up when we get hated on by online haters, Taylor gets to contact the bigwigs who run Instagram and have the situation dealt with.

According to the Daily Mail, Swift’s people have been given a special tool to block the snakes and other disparaging comments.

Hilariously, this has resulted in yet another public backlash for Swift, as many IG users are pissed that she’s receiving special treatment from the site, while those suffering legitimate harassment or stalking are left to fend for themselves:

“So instagram is just deleting sh-t for Taylor Swift but don’t do nothing when racists harass ppeople and say the n-word.” wrote’ one user.

“Tbh I was there to see some snake emojis,” commented another, along with some laughing smiley faces.

It’s a pretty minor controversy (especially by Swift’s standards these days), but it serves as yet another reminder that the girl who could do no wrong suddenly can’t seem to do anything right.

View Slideshow: Taylor Swift Is Over Party: Twitter Users Celebrate Singer’s Downfall