Take a deep breath, Patriots fans!! Losing Rob Gronkowski isn’t the end of the world … so says New England legend Troy Brown, who thinks the Pats are still Super Bowl bound THIS YEAR. Gronk had season-ending surgery on his back Friday … leaving…
Sunday, December 4, 2016
Amy Schumer Set to Star in Barbie Movie, Haters Unite
There are plenty of people who don’t care for Amy Schumer, and that’s fine.
Maybe she’s not your cup of tea. Maybe you don’t like her sense of humor, or maybe you think she’s been too offensive at times.
All that’s fine. This is your life, make your own choices.
But if you don’t like her because of the way she looks, or if you’ve expressed your negative feelings about her by making fun of her body?
Well, you’re probably just an asshole.
And unfortunately, judging by the reaction to this new piece of Schumer news, the world is just filled to the brim, absolutely overflowing, with assholes
Amy is reportedly in talks to star in a new live-action movie about Barbie.
The movie is supposed to have a PG rating, so it wouldn’t have any of Amy’s usual raunchiness, but she is said to be doing a rewrite of the current script.
As for the basic plot, it will be acknowledged that Amy doesn’t have the classic unrealistic Barbie proportions. Remember, Mattel recently released Barbies that come in more varied, more realistic body types?
Yeah, you can now buy Curvy Barbies, Petite Barbies, and Tall Barbies. The movie will play on that.
Amy’s Barbie character lives in Barbieland, where all the different Barbies live. You know, Dentist Barbie, Babysitter Barbie, Dog Walker Barbie, Gymnastics Barbie …
But her version of Barbie will get banished from Barbieland because she doesn’t quite fit the perfect Barbie mold. She is forced out into the real world, she learns about herself, etc.
Sounds cute, right? But so many people are furious about this casting.
“I just saw that Amy Schumer will play Barbie in an upcoming movie,” one jackass tweeted. “Now they should get Jonah Hill for Ken and I’ll be there on opening day.”
“So Amy Schumer’s gonna play a FAT Barbie with a gut and two chins and a pie fetish,” another wrote.
Yet another douchebag tweeted “More fat f-cks making the news. Amy Schumer as Barbie? The mental illness in Hollywood is mind-boggling.”
But as disappointing as those reactions were, there were still some decent people in the world who hated this news for less superficial reasons.
“Dear Hollywood,” one person asked, “please stop shoving Amy Schumer at us. Sincerely, everyone on planet earth.”
“There are plenty of women of many sizes who aren’t racist,” another commented. “They should consider them before Amy.”
“Donald Trump as POTUS. Amy Schumer as Barbie. Tyga as still alive … Smg 2016… what else?” read one admittedly hilarious tweet.
For what it’s worth, we’re kind of excited to see what Amy does with this.
How are y’all feeling?
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