In case you somehow haven’t heard, Beyonce is pregnant with twins.
Fortunately, this time there are no rumors about Beyonce faking her pregnancy, but there’s still plenty of ridiculous nonsense making the rounds on social media.
This time it has to do with a supposed change to Queen Bey’s famous face.
The ever-reliable MediaTakeOut (we say that with densest layer of sarcasm imaginable) reported this week that Bey received lip injections at some point in the past few months.
With their usual blend of journalistic eloquence and hard-hitting reportage, the Woodward and Bernsteins over at MTO had this to say about the latest photo of Mrs. Carter (above):
“SOMETHING WEIRD Is Going On With Beyonce’s Face… Looks Like She Got KYLIE JENNER LIP INJECTIONS… Cause Her LIPS ARE GIGANTIC!!”
We figured that with so many capital letters and exclamation points, MTO must be screaming an important truth in our faces.
But according to Bey’s rep, Yvette Noel-Schure, that’s simply not the case.
In a scathing open letter directed at the MTO staff, Noel-Schure absolutely went off, writing:
“What do you know about the effects of pregnancy on a woman’s entire body? Please tell me. Did you know that in addition to weight gain there is often a dramatic change in the blood flow in the system and increased fluid causing swelling?
Do you know that often women’s gums get swollen? Do you know that it sometimes affects our speech, our ability to chew intently and a host of other things?”
We imagine by this point, the folks at MTO were googling the location of the nearest burn unit.
But Yvette didn’t stop there.
She went on to defend Bey on behalf of all women who are, pregnant, have ever been pregnant, might one day be pregnant, or have ever uttered the word “pregnant”:
“But the sacrifice to our faces, our feet and our entire bodies is something we welcome because we bring beautiful humans into the world who will one day combat your hate and negativity I stood silent during Beyonce’s first pregnancy when you thought it was okay to bully her like the cowards you are, when you accused her of never being pregnant, but I simply cannot this time,” Noel-Schure wrote.
She goes on:
“You are the saddest individuals and picking on a pregnant lady is tantamount to possessing the coldest, despicable heart.
“You need to find something else to do with your time and maybe stop by a store that has happiness on sale because you need to buy some.”
Okay, so she kinda ran out of steam with that Costanza-esque happiness store thing at the end there, but we think Yvette got her point across.
And we’re guessing the folks at MTO will think twice before messing with the Bey Hive again.
(JK, they can’t be stopped.)
