Rodrigo Alves has undergone 51 cosmetic procedures and earned the nickname "The Human Ken Doll."
Whatever you might think of his personal choices, we can agree that Alves didn"t undergo all of these surgeries to come out looking like Lord Voldemort.
Unfortunately, as he learns in this appearance on Botched, that might end up being the case. Because his nose could atrophy and literally fall off of his face. Watch the video below!
Okay, so Rodrigo Alves is a British television personality.
He"s also probably exactly the sort of person who qualifies as a plastic surgery addict.
Like, we"re no experts, but … seriously.
That"s 51 elective procedures.
And apparently the last two procedures on his nose were so close together that they did some damage.
While Alves laments that his last rhinoplasty"s results were "perfect," it sounds like there was a serious complication.
And that"s why he"s on Botched.
Look, by its nature, Botched is full of horror stories.
That"s the show where we heard of Mama June"s terrible C-Section mishap.
There was a trans woman whose surgeon gave her unmanageably large breasts that she didn"t ask for.
Worst of all, one time Farrah Abraham was on Botched.
That memory still keeps us up at night.
But … we"re talking about a man"s nose turning black with atrophy and falling off like he"s a cartoon character.
The image is grotesque, but the risk sounds real.
When somebody"s face might pull a Sphinx if they make one more mistake with it, it"s not time to mince words.
"The issue is what we call the soft tissue envelope — that"s the skin," Dr. Nassif explains to a very worried Alves.
"So, by you having three surgeries within a period of 12-15 months, destroyed your tissue — the skin"s no good."
Just the thought of us makes our noses hurt in sympathy.
Up to a point.
Meanwhile, Alves himself notes that his friends never had problems but that he"s unlucky, so he keeps asking "why me."
Like … we know that the situation sucks, but maybe there are little kids floating on makeshift rafts to escape their war-torn homelands whose "why me?" questions carry a little more weight.
We"re not going to dive into deep theological questions of why bad things happen.
But we"re guessing that maybe Alves" friends spaced their surgeries out a little more.
"Your nose, on the inside … you have no airway," Dr. Nassif continues in the tone of carefully explaining to a student why their failure to show up to an exam resulted in such a bad final grade.
"And it"s short, so this is all scarred together."
Big yikes.
"And now, since you just had surgery three months ago, it"s going to scary again more. It"s in a healing phase."
Alves seems like he wants to protest, but the doctor keeps going.
"If you try to [do another procedure on] your skin now, while it"s healing, there"s a high possibility, that if you let one of these doctors touch your nose now, this will turn black and then die and fall off."
It"s pretty clear that the doctors, both Terry Dubrow and Paul Nassif, are spelling it out for him to make sure that he gets it.
And they"re using dramatic language to do it, in almost a scared straight sort of effort.
But it sounds like it"s working.
It sure scared the crap out of us.
We hope that they can fix his nose, somehow.
At the very least, we hope that Alves will listen to the good doctors.
If not, he might end up playing the worst game of "got-your-nose" in world history.
Watch the video to see their exchange — and his nose — for yourself. The photos can"t do it justice.
