Last month, Jennifer Lawrence and Darren Aronofsky broke up following a brief romance that began on the set of their not-so-well received artsy thriller mother!
Last year, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie separated, following a different sort of failed collaboration (the actors couldn’t see eye-to-eye with regard to their parenting methods).
We don’t need to tell you what this means:
Two of the Extremely Attractive People on Hollywood’s ever-dwindling A-list are single, and should therefore mingle.
Yes, we badly want Brad and Jen 2.0 to happen.
We would love nothing more than for these golden gods of cinema to get together and begin breeding brilliant and beautiful children who will lead us into a new era of peace and prosperity.
This is the America we wish to live in.
But if the fact that we once again didn’t awaken this morning to breakfast in bed served by a wisecracking robot has taught us anything, it’s that we can’t just will things into being simply because they’d be awesome.
Yes, there is a rumor that Brad and J-Law are hooking up, but sadly, it comes courtesy of the ever-unreliable Star magazine.
In a piece suspiciously titled, “Post split with Angelina Jolie, has Brad Pitt moved on to Jennifer Lawrence?” the tabloid offers some not-so-compelling evidence, mostly culled from anonymous sources.
One “insider” claims that Brad and Jen have been “enjoying lots of late nights.”
Another source wants us to believe that Brad freakin’ Pitt had a hard time summoning the courage to make the first move.
“Apparently, it was not too easy for Brad to gain the courage to reach out to Jennifer, but one of her friends gave him the green signal ‘because he’s been single long enough,’” the made-up informant claims.
“Jennifer is said to be so smitten that she has been putting up in Los Angeles, instead of New York, so that she can be closer to Brad.”
We call pieces like these Santa stories because we want to believe they’re true, but they don’t stand up to the slightest scrutiny.
But hey, Star just decided to put this one out there as a “law of attraction” type thing.
Maybe if we all say Pitt and Lawrence are banging, eventually it’ll start happening.
The power of positive thinking, and whatnot, ya know?
It’s the same reason we won’t shut up about our breakfast robot.
If we stop drawing blueprints like everyone wants us to, it’ll definitely never happen!
