Monday, January 22, 2018

The Situation Pleads Guilty to Tax Fraud, Braces For Prison

Last week, we learned that Jersey Shore star Mike Sorrentino’s tax fraud case has turned into quite the situation.


(Sorry, but one of the many downsides of giving yourself a dumb nickname in your twenties is that people will throw it in your face for the remainder of your days.) 



We’ve known for several months that The Situation might be facing jail time in connection with trying to hide approximately $ 9 million in earnings from the IRS.


But now, things are really coming to a head, as Sorrentino has pled guilty to charges that could land him behind bars for up to 15 years.


As The Ashley’s Reality Roundup reports, Mike was in court on Friday entering his plea.


His attorney issued a statement in which he pled for clemency from the judge:


“The plea terms call for a balance between punishing the wrong committed and conditions that facilitate Mike living a productive, law-abiding life moving forward,” the statement reads.


“Following through on this plea agreement, Michael intends to pay restitution before sentencing.”



We’re not sure what the taxes on $ 9 million in earnings are like, but we’re guessing it amounts to a hell of a lot more than the freakin’ Situation is able to come up with on short notice.


Mike’s situation scenario is dire, but it could be a lot worse.


For example, his brother, who allegedly masterminded the tax evasion is facing a whopping 25 years in the slammer!


And don’t worry Shore fanatics–Mike has obtained permission to temporarily relocate to Miami in order to participate in the show’s reunion, which is currently filming.


We don’t know about you, but this story is causing us some seriously mixed emotions.


On the one hand, the fact that The Sitch earned so much money that he thought he’d be able to hide $ 9 million makes us want to bang our heads into the wall until we stop feeling feelings.



On the other hand, his effort to bilk Uncle Sam proved woefully unsuccessful, which kind of reaffirms our faith in both the justice system and karma.


(Dude was often on colossal d-bag on Shore.)


On the … third hand (?) Mike has provided us with hours of entertainment over the years, and the thought of dude spending a decade and a half behind bars is undeniably a bummer.


This is real human drama here, folks.


Frankly, we’re starting to think MTV should Jersey Shore: Family Vacation on hold so they can start production on an 18-hour docu-drama about the story of the Sitch.



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