Jim Bob Duggar recently posted a letter in his family blog in honor of his wedding anniversary, and gushed repeatedly about Michelle.
His first-born son, however, was the recipient of subtle shade.
While it wasn’t the point of Jim Bob’s blog post, Josh Duggar’s name was absent, conspicuously, at a crucial point early in his tribute.
Surprisingly, when the two first got married 34 years ago, Michelle Duggar (nee Ruark) was using birth control and even wore pants.
We can’t believe it either, but that’s what he says:
“Believe it or not, when we first got married we decided we did not want to have children right away, so Michelle began taking birth control pills.”
“Three years into our marriage Michelle went off the pill and we had our first child,” he added, notably not mentioning the name Josh.
Jim Bob went on to say that this was a seminal moment: “Michelle got pregnant while she was on the pill, and the pill caused her to miscarry.”
“We talked to a Christian doctor and he explained that the pill could be abortive. However, after one miscarriage, we decided to stop rejecting ‘god’s gifts."”
Whether or not the pill is abortive is subject to debate.
What is quite clear is that Jim Bob systematically eliminated Josh’s disgraced name when he made passing reference to “our first child.”
Right after their decision, “God blessed us with twins, Jana and John, then Jill & Jessa, Jinger & Joseph,” he wrote, not forgetting their names.
Indeed, the Duggars would just as soon forget he exists these days, even going out of their way to shoot down rumors of his return to TV.
They didn’t waste time when talk of him appearing on Jill & Jessa: Counting On surfaced, clarifying that Josh Duggar returning to TLC are false.
Speaking of refuting reports, if Jim Bob and Michelle separated as some tabloids would have you believe, you would know it from this.
The opposite, in fact. Jim Bob GUSHES about her.
Of his tips for making it last through nearly three and a half decades, he says “both of us individually ask Jesus” for guidance.
“To forgive us for the things we have done wrong,” he says, but also to “take over the direction and control of our lives.”
According to Jim Bob, they praise each other in front of others, never putting each other down or calling each other derogatory names.
If there is a conflict, they talk privately and pray about it together, and in good times and bad, they honor and cherish each other.
“I look for opportunities to open doors, to carry heavy items or other ways to serve Michelle and regularly take time to talk with her,” he says.
“Michelle is always looking for ways to say I love you! I try to treat Michelle like a queen and she has always honored and respected me.”
Finally, JBD says that date nights (chaperone-free!) help too.
He reflects on their early courting days, and how they were counseled, ironically, “not to have a television for the first year of marriage.”
“We did that and it was an amazing honeymoon year.”
“Then shortly after our first year, someone gave us a TV and we connected it to cable. We instantly noticed our communication dropped off.”
“Our attention turned from each other, to being glued to the TV … we got rid of the television in order to concentrate more on each other.”
The irony, as a future reality star, is not lost on him.
“Looking back, that is one of the best things we have done for our marriage and family. As you can imagine, we are not against TV,” he says.
“Computers, phones and various forms of entertainment … [we just] ensure it doesn’t devour one of our most precious resource, time.”
Through it all, he says, it’s been unforgettable.
“We would have never dreamed the joy, fun, adventure and sometimes disappointment and tears that we have encountered.”
Raising 19 children, “there is never a dull moment. We love each one of our children and each is thankful for the life God has given them.”
Well, at least 18 of the 19 …
