Sadly, it seems the rumors about Taylor Swift dating Drake are bogus.
From the very start, a lot of people didn’t believe such a coupling was possible, but it sort of makes sense when you think about it.
After all, Drake is successful, foreign (Canada counts as a foreign country!), famous, tall, and non-threatening.
We assume the only reason Taylor didn’t pursue a relationship with him is the same reason her romance with Harry Styles fizzled so quickly:
Drake is almost as famous as she is, which we imagine is is a deal-breaker in the Taylor-verse.
Anyway, Drake actually did date Rihanna. Twice, in fact.
But sadly, both times, the relationship didn’t last very long.
Fortunately, Aubrey is a rugged, manly soul who shrugs off breakups and moves on to the next one without a second thought as to what he’s left behind.
Just kidding, as you read this, he’s refreshing RiRi’s Instagram page and sobbing hysterically.
Anyway, what does all this have to do with Taylor Swift?
Well, Drizzy and Tay-Tay are the king and queen of the breakup, which is part of the reason that so many people were eager to see their relationship “happen.”
Draylor wasn’t meant to be, but it looks like we’re getting the next best thing:
According, to In Touch, Taylor is assisting Drake with his new album – an album that will reportedly contain a few shots at his most recent ex.
“There will definitely be some digs at [Rihanna].” a source tells the tabloid.
“Drake’s still devastated by his breakup from Rihanna and is hoping that this will get under her skin.”
The collaboration makes sense, not only because Taylor traffics in breakup songs the same way Donald Trump traffics in ill-advised 3 am tweets, but because Taylor has her own reasons for seeking to one-up Rihanna.
If you know Calvin Harris as anything other than one of Taylor’s many famous exes, then you probably know his two biggest hits were both collaborations with RiRi.
Now, Taylor is apparently out to prove that she and Drizzy are the superior hit-making duo:
“She is hoping the song is a major hit — better than [her ex] Calvin Harris’ song [‘This Is What You Came For’] with Rihanna,” says the source.
Normally, we’d say this is all unbelievably petty, but Taylor Swift is involved.
She’s basically made a career out of redefining acceptable levels of pettiness.