Monday, July 9, 2018

Kim Kardashian: My Vagina Tastes Like a Pineapple & Yours Can Too!

Pineapples don’t enjoy the greatest reputation in the US, and it’s not hard to see why they’re so maligned.


They’re hard to eat; they don’t carry much nutritional value; and ordering them on your pizza can get you permanently kicked out of your friend group.



But Kim Kardashian wants you to know a pineapple a day can change your life in one very important way.


“Google the benefits of pineapple juice,” Kim captioned the pic above.


We’re gonna go ahead and save you some time, by informing you that Kim is referring to the flavor of her vajayjay.


Yes, research has found that consumption of pineapples and pineapple juice can lead to a more flavorful hoo-hah.


But fellas, you don’t need to be left out of this medical breakthrough.


Studies have shown that gobbling up the pointy fruit can improve the taste of reproductive fluids for both sexes.


While that’s certainly valuable information, we’re more interested in what this post tells us about Kim’s sex life.



Courtesy of Amber Rose, we already know that Kanye enjoys a finger up his butt from time to time.


But apparently it’s not all about Kanye in bed — as it is in every other aspect of Yeezy’s life.


West is clearly not averse to taking some trips down south, but it seems he is a bit picky when he’s eating at the “Y.”


We know this because Kim has been about that pineapple life for several years now, which leads us to believe Kanye offers more feedback than a dozen irate Yelp users.


Kim first tweeted about her love of the genital-improving juice back in 2013, writing:


“How good is pineapple juice? All those amazing benefits!”


She added a licking-face emoji, to ensure that fans wouldn’t miss her meaning.



As longtime fans of Keeping Up With the Kardashians know, 2013 was also the year of the Great Kard Clan Vagina Smell-Off.


Yes, in one memorable episode (unless, of course, you’ve been successful in blocking the scene in question from your mind) Kim and Kourtney participated in a contest to determine who had the better smelling vadge.


Khloe was chosen as judge, of course.


Kim won with the help of a few cans of the good stuff from Dole.


Yes, it seems pineapple juice is to Kim what spinach is to Popeye.


We could be total buzzkills and point out that you probably need to drink a ridiculous amount of pineapple juice to alter the taste of your bodily fluids, but this is an area in which placebo effect is probably about 90 percent of the experience.



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