It’s not uncommon for celebrities to trademark certain words and phrases that are commonly associated with their brand, but no one has ever wanted to own the words that come out of your mouth quite as much as Taylor Swift.
Earlier this year, Taylor trademarked the phrase “this sick beat,” so we probably owe her a dollar or something just for using it in this sentence.
Now, T-Swizzle is coming for another chunk of the English language, as her team has reportedly filed for trademarks on the phrases “and I’ll write your name,” “1989,” “blank space,” “Swiftmas,” and “a girl named Girl.”
A Girl Named Girl is the title of a novel that Taylor wrote when she was 15. We have to idea what the hell Swiftmas is, but yours won’t be very merry if you piss off Taylor’s legal team!
As for copyrighting a year, well that’s just an act of cartoonish supervillainy that brings Taylor one step closer to global domination.
So you better get those references to the fall of the Berlin Wall out of your system now, because soon enough all things 1989 will be property of Ms. Swift.
The whole thing sounds insane, but we think we know what this is all about.
You see, 2015 was supposed to be looked back upon as The Year of Taylor Swift. Then some strange things happened.
Adele broke Taylor’s sales records. Kendrick Lamar earned more Grammy nominations. Worst of all, Taylor’s sworn enemy Katy Perry was the year’s highest-earning musician.
Taylor celebrated her birthday over the weekend, and there’s not a doubt in our minds that when she blew out the candles, a high-ranking member of her squad asked her what she wished for and Taylor replied, “The world, mijo,” in her best Scarface voice before picking her teeth with a machete.
Okay, maybe that’s just how we like to imagine things went down.