Samuel L. Jackson Recaps Game of Thrones: F--k Those Dragons!

It might be a full ten months before the seven bless us with new episodes of Game of Thrones.

There was a time when we thought we’d have to rely on our memories of the epic season 6 finale to keep us cool until winter comes again.

Fortunately, now we have a surprisingly-thorough recap of the entire series courtesy of the baddest motherf–ker on the planet, Samuel L. Jackson:

Samuel L. Jackson Explains Game of Thrones

“The seasons in this place last a ridiculously long time,” Jackson notes early on. 

“So let’s just say [the characters] ain’t too happy about winter coming.”

It’s a simple observation, but an important one.

In fact, it’s one of the most important facts about the show, but it receives surprisingly little serious attention.

We all know the Stark family’s icy reminder of the importance of constant preparedness, but we bet you’d be surprised by how many of your non-book-reading, casual GoT-watching friends are unaware (or have simply never thought about) the likelihood that winter will last for the remainder of these characters’ lives.

Obviously, the the entire 7-minute clip is hilarious, but it’s also a potent reminder of everythihg that brought us to this point and just how much has happened since viewers were first introduced to the lands of Westeros and Essos back in 2011.

Robert Baratheon, Viserys Targaryen, Ned Stark … These days, sky-high body counts are par for the course on GoT, but back in Season 1, fans were shocked by the show’s willingness to off characters who seemed to be established as series regulars.

“Nice family, right?” Jackson says of the Starks. “Don’t get attached.”

In a way there could be no better recapper than Jackson, as he’s one of the few actors who’s responsible for almost as many onscreen deaths as David Benioff and D.B. Weiss.

And if those reports of a production delays on Season 7 of Thrones are true, we may be turning to this video for comfort many times in the coming months.

Fortunately, you can always watch Game of Thrones online if you’re fiending for some midsummer Snow.

View Slideshow: Game of Thrones Season 7: How Many Episodes Are Left? What’s Jon Snow’s Real Name? And Other Questions

George Bush Dances To Battle Hymn Of The Republic During Dallas Memorial

On July 12th, President Barack Obama was joined by his wife, First Lady Michelle Obama, former President George Bush, Former First Lady Laura Bush, Vice President Joe Biden and Dr. Jill Biden at the memorial service for the five Dallas police officers who were shot and killed by a sniper during a July 7th protest.

It was a moving ceremony, but things got weird once "Battle Hymn Of The Republic" started playing.

All of a sudden, Bush started marching in place and swinging his arms, one of which was attached to Michelle (everyone held hands during the performance).

Michelle looked at him with a bit of disdain at first (can you blame her?), but then softened up once she realized he was really getting into the song.

While many wondered if Bush was acting inappropriately, Twitter user @CharitySaysSo came to his defense.

"In Sunday & grade schools, southerners learn to sing & march w/ joy & pride to the Battle Hymn," she tweeted, according to AOL.

"Can you imagine being in a room with 2k or more officers and hearing that magnificent song and realizing for one moment…just for one moment…we all were getting along and singing praise? I would be swaying and rejoicing myself," a Facebook user wrote.

God Bless this beautiful country and God"s speed to those fallen officers in this funeral service."

To his credit, Bush posted a fantastic tribute to the slain officers on his Instagram account.

"Too often, we judge other groups by their worst examples – while judging ourselves by our best intentions," he wrote.

"And this has strained our bonds of understanding and common purpose. But Americans, I think, have a great advantage. To renew our unity, we only need to remember our values. We have never been held together by blood or background.

"We are bound by things of the spirit – by shared commitments to common ideals."

George Bush Dances To Battle Hymn Of The Republic During Dallas Memorial

On July 12th, President Barack Obama was joined by his wife, First Lady Michelle Obama, former President George Bush, Former First Lady Laura Bush, Vice President Joe Biden and Dr. Jill Biden at the memorial service for the five Dallas police officers who were shot and killed by a sniper during a July 7th protest.

It was a moving ceremony, but things got weird once "Battle Hymn Of The Republic" started playing.

All of a sudden, Bush started marching in place and swinging his arms, one of which was attached to Michelle (everyone held hands during the performance).

Michelle looked at him with a bit of disdain at first (can you blame her?), but then softened up once she realized he was really getting into the song.

While many wondered if Bush was acting inappropriately, Twitter user @CharitySaysSo came to his defense.

"In Sunday & grade schools, southerners learn to sing & march w/ joy & pride to the Battle Hymn," she tweeted, according to AOL.

"Can you imagine being in a room with 2k or more officers and hearing that magnificent song and realizing for one moment…just for one moment…we all were getting along and singing praise? I would be swaying and rejoicing myself," a Facebook user wrote.

God Bless this beautiful country and God"s speed to those fallen officers in this funeral service."

To his credit, Bush posted a fantastic tribute to the slain officers on his Instagram account.

"Too often, we judge other groups by their worst examples – while judging ourselves by our best intentions," he wrote.

"And this has strained our bonds of understanding and common purpose. But Americans, I think, have a great advantage. To renew our unity, we only need to remember our values. We have never been held together by blood or background.

"We are bound by things of the spirit – by shared commitments to common ideals."

Ariel Winter: I Hope Taylor Swift Likes Her Boobs!

Ariel Winter. Taylor Swift. Boobs. Plastic Surgery.

*sits back and waits for the Internet to explode*

We assume if you’re still reading this, society has been rebuilt in the wake of the apocalyptic SEO orgy that resulted from Ariel Winter talking about Taylor Swift’s boobs.

Good work, society!

Now, it might seem like a bad idea to revisit the disaster that brought us to this point, but we’re guessing you could use a break after all that planet repopulating you’ve been doing.

Anyway, as most important things do, it all started with Ariel Winter’s boobs.

Obviously, the Modern Family star’s breasts play a large (no pun intended) role in her massive (okay, pun intended that time) social media popularity.

But she’s considered something of an authority on all things boob-related for different reasons.

As you may know, Winter underwent breast reduction surgery last year, and she’s spoken openly about the experience on multiple occasions.

Maybe that’s why interviewers feel comfortable asking the 18-year-old about boobs. We’re not sure.

In any event, here’s what Ariel had to say about rumors that Taylor Swift got breast implants:

“It took me a while to accept myself and I just hope that girls can learn to accept themselves however big or small their breasts are.

“And I have to say if Taylor Swift did get her boobs done then good for her if she felt like she wanted to.”

So there you have it.

Not really all that incendiary, and yet the whole situation left you using a rock to fight your neighbors off from a half a discarded Big Mac you found in a dumpster.

Crazy world we live in.

You gonna finish that Big Mac?

View Slideshow: Ariel Winter: 31 Pics of Our Favorite Modern Family Star!