Yesterday, we reported that Amber Portwood is in talks with a porn company about the possibility of gettin’ down on camera for a what would no doubt be a lucrative payday.
Many dismissed the rumor for the simple reason, that all of the Teen Mom ladies (including Amber) have talked a lot of trash about Farrah Abraham’s sex tape over the years, and Portwood would look like quite the hypocrite if she also signed with Vivid.
Amber issued a statement on the matter last, however, and to our utter shock, she says her porn career might really be happening.
“It’s in consideration. I still have not made up my mind,” Amber told E! News, noting that the deal will bring her “millions.”
“I am not strapped for cash. I have a nice house, a nice life. I have everything I need. But I’m a business person.”
Hmm … Well, business people generally don’t take their clothes off for money, but who knows? Maybe this is the start of a new trend.
Maybe we’ll see Warren Buffett stripping down for The O-Face of Omaha.
Perhaps Mark Cuban and friends will soon be sporting nothing but cowboy hats and sheriffs badges in The Mavericks Do Dallas.
We could soon see Sheryl Sandberg dropping her uber-professional facade to star in Lean In … Now Lean Out, Then Lean Back In Again and Repeat.
You get the idea.
As for the “millions” that Amber is talking about, well, that’s a bit of a stretch.
According to E!, the deal that’s currently in place would have her making $ 85,000 plus 35% of the film’s net profits.
Don’t get us wrong, she stands to make a pretty penny from the skin flick, but it would have to do extremely well for her to see millions, plural.
Doubling down on the talk that sounds like she’s desperately struggling to convince herself this is a good idea, Amber says her family is totally on board with it, and the money is totes going to charity, anyway:
“Right now I’m weighing the pros and cons. I’ve called most of my family and they told me they love me no matter what,” Amber says, adding that the profits would go toward “opening rehab centers all over the world.”
Amber goes on to assure fans that she’ll keep the whole thing a secret from her daughter:
“Leah would not know about it until she’s old enough,” Amber says.
“She’s in elementary school right now. I would hope no one would even think to tell her. It would be something I’d do when she’s the right age.”
Someone should really inform Amber that kids these days tend to know their way around the Internet.
The reaction online has been mixed between variations on “get it, gurl!” and reminders that Amber’s daughter is old enough to understand what’s going on here.
Of course, there’s one person, who we’re guessing is very much on board with the deal:
The Farrah Abraham-Amber Portwood feud is still ongoing, and shaming Farrah for starring in a porn has been one of Portwood’s favorite trash-talking points.
The semi-coherent shade that Farrah will throw if Amber follows in her footsteps is sure to be stuff of legend.
As for what exactly will be happening on camera, Amber’s co-star in the film will of course be her on-again, off-again fiance, Matt Baier.
We’re thinking the presence of bare Baier might put a damper on those “millions” in profits.
Just sayin’.