Kristen Bell Posts CUTEST. INSTAGRAM. EVER.

Dear Santa – For Christmas, I would like this kind of a relationship.

One can’t help but stare admiringly at Kristen Bell’s first Instagram because it is so #lovegoals and #cutecouple.

“I don’t know how to use instagram but I do like this picture,” Bell wrote.  Above that was a photo of the Zootopia star kissing husband, Dax Shepard.

Children everyone will remember this as “That Photo With Elsa Kissing Kristoff,” because Shepard could pass for Kristoff, I guess?

Bell’s next Instagram featured her adorable dog, Lola, who might be a corgi-lion mix, based on the photo.

“Having just gotten a bath and cut yesterday, I’m really looking forward to lola spending the day in the los angeles rain,” Bell wrote on February 18th, “so she can go back to smelling like a sour sock as quickly as possible.”

Bell and Shepard married in 2013, and have two daughters, Lincoln, 2 and Delta, 1.  

Bell stars next in The Boss, playing a former employee of Melissa McCarthy’s character, a business mogul who went to jail for insider trading. 

In other Bell news, I love the above Instagram post almost as much as I love her love for sloths (below).  It’s hard not to lose it when you see such joy.

Kristen Bell LOVES Sloths!

Kylie Jenner: "Wedgie Jeans" Are the Secret to a Great Ass

Kylie Jenner and her overexposed butt are bringing mom jeans back, because it turns out that the secret to a great backside is… a wedgie.

When the lip kit guru first posted a pic of herself wearing these high-waisted jeans, we were all a bit perplexed.

A Kylie belfie is certainly nothing new, but in this case, it was just so much more fabric than we’re used to seeing on her, plus they were Levi’s and not Balmain.

Well, it turns out that she was shilling for the 162-year-old denim company, and much to its delight.

After posting these photos, Levi’s sold out of its “Wedgie Jeans,” a new cut designed to hug your cheeks and accentuate roundness, according to Us Weekly.

“Designers at Levi’s noticed that women were buying high-waisted denim one size smaller for a lifting effect on their derrieres,” reports the magazine. “Rather than have their customers uncomfortable in a too-tight pair, they came up with a flattering fix.”

The result: a pair of denim pants that ride up your butt? Sure, because who gives a damn about jeans being comfortable as long as your ass looks round and big.

Should’ve called them the “Sir Mix-a-lot” jeans.

But hey, if you’ve got Kylie Jenner posting them to Instagram it appears you could call them the “Cut Off Your Circulation and Give You Urinary Tract Infection” jeans and they’d probably still sell out.

We know of a few ladies who are excited.

This isn’t the first time this week we’ve seen a member of the Kardashian-Jenner crew suffer for beauty. Yesterday, Kylie’s big sister Kim posted a photo of her breasts covered in gaffer’s tape in order to create red carpet cleavage.

View Slideshow: Kylie Jenner Does Stuff on Instagram

Jax Taylor Pleads Guilty to Theft: I Was HAMMERED!!!

If you watch Vanderpump Rules online, you know that the always-unstable Jax Taylor has been even more off-the-rails than usual this season.

His bad decision making and Kanye-esque fits of ego have been on display in just about every episode (The dude literally tried to have the final say on what size breast implants his girlfriend would get.), but the moment that stands out in the minds of many fans as #PeakJax is when he was arrested for stealing a pair of sunglasses while on vacation in Hawaii.

As a reality star and co-owner of a successful restaurant, Jax can easily afford just about any pair of sunglasses on the market but that didn’t stop him from half-assedly shoplifting a $ 300 pair of Polaris shades, thus forcing his friends to cough up the $ 11,000 bail.

Typically, any time you’re out of state is the worst time to commit a crime, as you’ll almost certainly have to travel back there for your trial.

But at least Jax had the good sense to perpetrate his drunken heist in Hawaii, which gave him an excuse to take a second trip to the Big Island, this time just with long-suffering girlfriend Brittany Cartwright.

Jax and Brit have been in Hawaii all week, and Taylor’s case was finally settled yesterday.

TMZ is reporting that Jax copped a plea deal and got off easy.

He won’t serve any time behind bars, but he will be on probation for the next year.

Jax’s excuse? One that judges in tourist destinations probably hear a lot: he was hammered.

“I had too many drinks, too many mai tais,” Jax reportedly told the court with a straight face.’

Fortunately for him, Hawaiian judges are like Lisa Vanderpump: endlessly forgiving.

Brad Pitt: Cheating on Angelina Jolie With Selena Gomez! (According to Ridiculous Tabloid)

Pretty much from the day they first joined forces and decided to start a multi-culti kid collective that will one day rule Hollywood with an iron fist, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have been the subject of constant breakup rumors.

Ironically, the reports of trouble in Brangelina Land have only become more frequent since Pitt and Jolie got married in 2014.

The latest nonsense comes from Star magazine, who claims that Angelina is pissed – pissed! – about rumors that Brad has been hooking up with Selena Gomez.

“She’s insane with jealousy over the Selena rumors,” an insider tells the tabloid.

The story is complete and utter BS, but at least it’s kinda, sorta, almost rooted in reality, as Brad and Selena have been spending an unusual amount of time together lately.

By which we mean more time than you would expect a 23-year-old single woman and a 52-year-old father of 47 to spend together.

The reason, of course, is that Brad and Selena both appear in The Big Short, which is currently nominated for five Oscars, thus requiring Brad and Selena to appear at many of the same events. 

It may seem strange that Selena plays herself in a film about the 2008 housing crisis, but if you haven’t seen it, trust us, you haven’t lived until you’ve seen Ms. Gomez explain collateralized debt obligations.

Nefarious Wall Street mumbo-jumbo never sounded so sexy.

Anyway, the fact that the Selena rumors come on the heels of reports about Brad and Angelina fighting while on vacation has many believing that it’ll soon be Splitsville for the Jolie-Pitts.

We can’t say for certain that they’re not having problems, but trust us – Brad would be more likely to adopt Selena than to sleep with her.