If you know only one thing about the Duggar family, it’s probably that these folks love ‘em some procreatin’.
Like, women in the Duggar family are told from a young age that they’ve been put on the Earth for the sole purpose of squeezing out babies.
It’s kinda their whole thing.
But like your Aunt Mildred who only gets loaded on Christmas, the Duggars have very strict rules governing their favorite activity.
In Duggar Land, the path from meeting a potential sperm donor to beginning the gestation process is known as “courting” – and the Duggar courtship rules make the family look down right chillaxed in every other aspect of their lives.
Forget about pre-marital sex, the Duggars aren’t even allowed to hold hands for extended periods of time prior to exchanging vows.
The family reportedly freaked about about Jinger Duggar flouting courtship rules by – gasp! – hugging her fiance before the two of them walked down the aisle.
If those rumors are true, then the Dugs must really be freaking out about the latest gossip surrounding fan favorite daughter Joy-Anna:
These days, Joy-Anna is courting Austin Forsyth.
The new couple announced their relationship on a recent episode of the family’s reality series, Counting On, because Duggar children tell the world they’re dating someone before they even kiss that person, which isn’t creepy at all.
Now, Star magazine (we know, we know) claims that the young couple simply can’t keep their hands – or their genitals – off each other:
“Despite this ‘courting’ nonsense, Joy-Anna and Austin have actually been having sex together for a year,” a source tells the tabloid.
The insider goes on to claim that the lusty coupling nearly resulted in one of those Sin Babies:
“She [Joy-Anna] and Austin went way past hand-holding stage a long time ago – and it led to them getting the fright of their young lives,” the source claims.
“That was obviously a huge sigh of relief for everyone concerned, but it didn’t erase the horror for Jim Bob and Michelle that they had come closer than close to having another family sex scandal on their hands!”
Something tells us “horror” isn’t the word Jim Bob used when he learned of the situation.
Anyway, as much as we wish it were true, the whole thing is almost certainly BS, which is a shame, as it would’ve made for a great spinoff.
We can already hear the spinoff:
“Cast out of her family’s home due to her sinful ways, a young woman seeks reproductive services, healthcare and employment in Trump’s America. This, is Modern Tragedy!”