Subtweeting is usually about someone having bad manners or letting someone know that you know.
It isn’t usually about crime.
But Khloe Kardashian shot out some tweets about a friend stealing from her … and is straight-up asking if she should go to the police.
“What would you do if you found out a friend was stealing from you?”
That was her tweet, seemingly out of nowhere, on Thursday.
But that wasn’t the end of what she had to say.
“Would you cut off the friendship and let God handle it? Or would you go the legal route?”
That was her second tweet, a clear follow-up to the first.
We know that the Kardashians subscribe to a very specific sort of Christianity, and we can respect that as much as we can respect anything about the Kardashians, but simply cutting off a friendship won’t stop them from stealing from the next person, you know?
She did clarify that she did not mean her friend, actress Malika Haqq, who had been named in some of the response tweets. “No, guys! Malika is my sister! Never ever ever! We ride for life.”
“Way TOO many shady people in the world. The grass is cut LOW. I see a few snakes.”
It’s a little unclear if that last one is talking more about the unnamed, “hypothetical” thief … or the responses that she was getting on Twitter.
Maybe both.
You know, if pregnancy rumors about Khloe and Tristan Thompson are true, this could be the hormones talking. But maybe not.
The strangest part of all of that is the bit about going to the police, right?
For most of us, Twitter is a great way to keep up with friends in real time, follow the news, have occasional brushes with celebrities, and make what we will of the occasional covfefe.
But for Khloe, it’s apparently a place to ask for legal advice.
But we think that we know what was going on there, and she wasn’t really asking for advice.
Because anyone who might have actually been stealing from her would probably want to stop at that point. Being caught is scary enough, but police involvement would be so much work.
Hell, they might even break off the friendship themselves out of fear that Khloe would turn them in.
The true purpose of subtweeting isn’t to share your situation with others, it’s to have your tweets read by their unnamed subject.
Khloe was sending a clear message.
If we hear that she’s called the cops on somebody, we’ll know for sure that it wasn’t received.
