Wednesday, March 8, 2017

Kate Middleton to World: See? I Do Real Work!

In terms of work ethic, not a whole lot is expected from the royal family.


Sure, as symbols of their nation, its history, and its diplomatic relations with the rest of the world, they have a lot of weight on their shoulders, but if you put in as many hours as your job as they do at theirs, you’d be canned by the end of the week.


The royals have never exactly been a callus-handed lot, but some believe they do less work now than they ever have before.



And those critics have the numbers to prove it.


Prince William and Kate Middleton have participated in far fewer royal engagements than their predecessors in recent years, and even 90-year-old Queen Elizabeth II puts in more hours than these two.


The situation has led to Will and Kate being called the “laziest royals” in UK history.


The couple has reportedly bristled against accusations that they spend the bulk of their time seated on their royal arses, and sources say they’re eager for the chance to prove that they too can work hard (by royal standards).


Now, it seems the opportunity they’ve been looking for has been provided by last year’s conclusive evidence that folks in the UK are just as capable of voting against their own best interests as those of on this side of the pond.



We’re talking, of course, about Brexit.


Yes, Brexit: or as we like to call it, “Donald Trump of referendums.”


We won’t get into the political implications of the UK’s decision to withdraw from the EU, except to say it’s gonna result in a big old international mess.


And the task of cleaning up that mess will fall, in part, to Will and Kate.



The royal couple was already planning a European summer tour (think the Rolling Stones, but with fewer guitar and more painfully forced smiles), but now their planned visits to France, Poland, and Germany have taken on added importance, what with the world ending and all.


Nasty business, that.


According to several UK media outlets, Will and Kate will engage in a sort of “soft diplomacy” as part of an effort to convince foreign leaders that their British people still very much value their friendship.


“They’re very much seen as unofficial Brexit ambassadors,” a source tells the Mirror.



So it sounds like Windsors have a busy summer ahead of them.


The bad news is, any plans for a third Kate pregnancy will have to likely be delayed until at least fall.’


The good news is, they’re helping to throw some thimbles full of water onto the raging dumpster fire that we call “humanity in 2017.”


Good luck, you guys!



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