Over the weekend, millions gathered in cities all over the country to demand that legislators act quickly to increase gun control regulations.
The move came in response not only to the recent school shooting in Parkland, Florida, but also as a reaction to the ongoing gun violence epidemic that’s claimed thousands of lives and shows no signs of letting up.
These were people who gathered out of compassion, concern for our nations youth, and a sincere desire for change.
So naturally, whiny Millennial snowflake and noted dog kicker Tomi Lahren was quick to sh-t on the event with her trademark blend of bitterness and idiocy:
“Simply being anti-NRA is not a solution. March FOR something, not just against everything,” Lahren tweeted about an event that was literally called March For Our Lives.
“It’s a shame schools don’t teach the U.S. Constitution anymore. Appreciation for our 2A is lost when history is forgotten and ignored in favor of ‘feelings’ 101,” Tawny Larynx added.
She went on to really grasp at straws, remnding protesters that millions of Americans are heavily armed, which were pretty sure was the point of the protest.
“Do you realize millions of your FELLOW AMERICANS are members of the NRA?” Tormund tweeted, demonstrating once and for all that ignorance isn’t always blissful – sometimes it’s characterized by seeting rage.
“Disarming the citizenry is the first step to oppression and tyranny. Kids, I suggest you crack open the history book and learn this pattern,” said Tammy, apparently seeing nothing wrong with issuing a smug lecture to children who fear for their lives.
It’s rants like this that have made the far-right commentator such an easy target for her critics, many of whom delight in calling Timebomb by the wrong name.
But this time, it wasn’t just Tone-Loc’s ill-advised insights that had Twitter in an uproar.
Behold, the open-carry yoga ensemble:
For obvious reasons, the internet has delighted in roasting Toni over her “vagina gun.”
Lawrence posted the above photo on Instagram in order to shill for a company that sells leggings equipped with holsters:
“Live. Speak. Stand. Run. Carry with Confidence,” Tonsil captioned the pic.
“Ladies, chances are your assailant is gonna be bigger, stronger and faster and that’s why you have @alexoathletica for your gun, your mace, or even your phone. Yeah, you’ve got it covered.”
Yes, this is a real product, and yes, Twutter had an absolute field day with the absurdity of the situation.
“Breaking News: Tomi Lahren rushed to hospital after trying to do Downward Facing Dog with gun in her yoga pants,” wrote one user.
“I admire Tomi’s earnest but ultimately misguided commitment to bringing Freud’s penis envy theorem back into style,” commented another.
“I get it, Tomi. I too, can never fully relax at yoga class unless I have a gun pointed at my crotch,”
You get the idea.
We could literally re-post these all day, but hopefully Tampax has learned her lesson by now.
Shell never get re-hired by Glenn Beck if he has to worry about her bringing her crotch Glock to work.
