Showing posts with label Definitive. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Definitive. Show all posts

Friday, December 8, 2017

Teen Mom: The Definitive, Tragically Trashy Tattoo Guide!


If you"re a fan of Teen Mom, then you know that many of the people on the show have tattoos.


You also know that a lot of the tattoos … well, they aren"t that great.


Some are poorly done, some are just kind of strange, and some are nightmarish and horrifying and just so completely, unbelievably bad.


So steady yourself, perhaps grab some smelling salts and some pearls to clutch, and let"s check out all the Teen Mom ink we can get our eyes on!




1. Amber’s Tattoo of Leah


Ambers tattoo of leah

Here, let’s just start with the worst of the worst, all right? This is Amber Portwood’s portrait of her daughter, Leah. It’s right on her stomach, it also features a gigantic rose, and it’s not finished. Will she ever get it finished? It’s hard to say. We will ever be able to get this haunting image out of our heads? Unlikely.



2. Choices


Choices

Since we’re already talking about Amber’s tattoos, she also got this matching tattoo with Matt Baier, back when they first started dating. It reads “vero amore,” which is supposed to be Italian for “true love.” So that’s embarrassing.



3. Speaking of Embarrassing …


Speaking of embarrassing

Matt also has this huge tattoo of Amber’s name right on his forearm. Just right there on his arm where he has to look at it all day, every day.



4. Ugh


Matt baier book cover

Matt actually has several tattoos, many of which you can see on his nude book cover. We won’t waste more time on him here, so if you feel the need to look more closely at his naked greasy bod here, then you have our blessing. However, we will say that on his other arm, he has a couple of Chinese characters that he says mean “clean and sober,” but that Teen Mom detectives have actually determined mean “Lisa.”



5. Why Though?


Why though

As hard as it may be to believe, Matt isn’t the only guy to get Amber Portwood’s name tattooed on his body — Gary Shirley made the exact same mistake. Thankfully he was smart enough (???) to get the tattoo on his shoulder instead of on his forearm though, and he’s since covered up.



6. It’s Gary Time


Its gary time

Gary also has a … what is that, a sun? A blob with tentacles? Whatever it is, he’s also got some tattoo right in the middle of his chest, peeking out through all his body hair.


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Wednesday, September 27, 2017

HGTV Shows: The Definitive Rankings!


We don"t know what it is, exactly, about home renovation and design.


All we know is this: HGTV is the most addictive channel on all of television.


Chalk it up to the allure of fancy homes… the personable hosts… the fun of debating style and taste with your significant other.


Whatever the reason, we can"t get enough HGTV.


But which popular HGTV show is the best of the bunch? Let"s take a close look below and come up with an answer…




13. Rehab Addict


Rehab addict

Boo! Hiss! We’re sorry, Nicole Curtis, but you shouldn’t be using the words “rehab” or “addict” in any kind of positive or promotional sense. You annoy us.



12. Selling LA


Selling la

Selling LA chronicles brokers from three different real estate firms as they build up their rosters of millionaire clients and tour spectacular luxury home. The competition aspect is enjoyable, but the focus on wealth becomes nauseating after awhile.



11. Pool Kings


Pool kings

It’s an entire show about pools. Always fun for a few minutes because… holy cow, do some people have amazing pools?!? But the concept quickly gets old.



10. Beachfront Bargain Hunters


Beachfront bargain hunters

It loses some points for being such a blatant House Hunters rip-off. But it gains points for reminding us of all the beauty in the world. We’d live in pretty much any home featured here!



9. Hawaii Life


Hawaii life

The same as Beachfront Bargan Hunters. Just based solely in Hawaii.



8. Living Alaska


Living alaska

Again, same premise. This time in Alaska! But this gets ranked higher because it’s pretty cool to jet around Alaska and see such gorgeous, unique areas.


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Friday, November 11, 2016

Krazy Kardashian Baby Names: The Definitive Kountdown!


On November 10, 2016, Blac Chyna gave birth to a daughter named Dream.


Dream Renee Kardashian, to be exact.


We"d be taken aback by this name, but… have you met Dream"s cousins?!?


This is a family as well known (nearly) for its collection of unique baby names as for its collection of sex tapes.


Which name is the most ridiculous? Which is the most normal? Let"s count em all down, shall we?




7. Mason Disick


Mason disick

He was the first child born to Scott Disick and Kourtney Kardashian. So it took them a couple more to fully grasp this weird name thing.



6. Penelope Disick


Penelope disick

Again, nothing too unique here. Scott and Kourtney were clearly trying to throw fans for a normal swerve before having their third kid.



5. Reign Disick


Reign disick

… and there it is! Reign Disick is a cutie. But Kourtney and Scott must have assumed she’d be their final child and had no choice but to make an unusual name impact.



4. King Cairo


King cairo

His dad is dating Kylie Jenner. His mom just gave birth to rob Kardashian’s son. King is totally part of the family!



3. Saint West


Saint west

The second child born to Kanye West and Kim Kardashian, Saint somehow only has the second silliest baby name in the family.



2. North West


North west

Yup, they really did it. Kanye and Kim really did name their first child North.


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Monday, October 24, 2016

Taylor Swift Albums: The Definitive Countdown!


Taylor Swift is a global superstar who stops the planet from rotating once every two years when she releases a new album.


This cannot be denied or debated.


But which of these smash hit albums represent Swift"s best work? Which would we prefer to forget?


Weigh in below on our rankings of Taylor Swift studio albums…




1. A Decade and Counting…


A decade and counting

Taylor Swift release her first studio album ever back in 2006. Yes, it’s been 10 years, people! Can you believe it?!? Ready to find out how we’d rank each record? Let’s do this…



2. Fearless


Fearless

Released in 2008, Fearless became the best-selling album of 2009 in the United States. There’s no denying its commercial success. But while “Love Story” and “You Belong with Me” are probably the two most memorable tracks off the record, both are pretty harmless and, really, pretty forgettable in the long run/big picture.



3. Taylor Swift


Taylor swift

The album that started it all. This record peaked at number-five and each one of its tracks – “Tim McGraw,” “Teardrops on My Guitar,” “Our Song,” “Picture to Burn,” and “Should’ve Said No”- charted within the top 40 in America. Look how young and innocent Swift is in the above photo!



4. Speak Now


Speak now

This is when Taylor really started to get personal. The album debuted atop the U.S. charts and include hits (“Mine,” “Back to December,” “Mean” ) that we knew were about her ex-boyfriends. It was great.



5. Red


Red

Swift’s fourth studio album Red became her first number-one in the United Kingdom. It also topped the charts in Australia, Canada, Ireland, New Zealand and United States and it included two of her catchiest songs: “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” and “I Knew You Were Trouble.” Good luck getting them out of your head now!



6. 1989


1989

And speaking of catchy songs! Swift’s full-on pop album sold 1.287 million copies, making her the first artist to release three albums with sales of one million within a single week. Amazing. One could almost argue that “Shake It Off” “Blank Space” and “Bad Blood” are her three best tracks of all-time.


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