Guy Orders Milkshake at McDonald"s, Then S--t Gets Really Weird

Josh Raby, the creator of a web series called Local Air, just wanted a milkshake from McDonald"s late at night over the weekend.

He got a lot more than he bargained for.

Fortunately for us, Raby live-tweeted his McDonald"s experience late Sunday night, as one weird exchange gave way to the next.

"It"s 1AM and I decided I wanted a milkshake. So there"s a McDonald"s near my house," Raby told his Twitter followers.

"I"m greeted at the drive thru by the following sentence: "Hey holy s–t hello, you are at McDonald"s, and I am begging your patience.""

Holy s–t? It only got weirder from there …

1. Have Patience?

Praise you?

2. Milkshake.

If only it were so simple.

3. I Need a Minute

For your non-descript milkshake.

4. I Do Have Apple Pies

Okay then …

5. Are You OK?

I’m not OK. (Clearly.)

6. How About a Chicken Sandwich?

That was just asking for confusion.

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Jessica Simpson Says That Her Daughter"s Milkshake Brings All the Boys to the Yard

Jessica Simpson has shared a very cute photo of her daughter, Maxwell.

She has also written something very inappropriate about said photo and said daughter.

The singer (can we still call Jessica that?!?) shared the above image of her three-year old child on Instagram yesterday, giving followers a look at Maxwell clutching a large milkshake while posing in a sassy manner, with her hand on her hip.

It’s definitely an adorable image.

But then Jessica went back in time and quoted the 2003 Kelis song “Milkshake” as a caption to the snapshot, writing:

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and they’re like it’s better than yours… #MAXIDREW

We’re assuming Simpson meant no harm with this caption, but the term “milkshake” in this context is generally believed to be a reference to oral sex on a man.

Kelis did not admit that herself, but she did say at the time of the track’s release that its title was a reference to something sexual.

“Milkshake is just that thing that makes a woman stand out from everyone else,” the artist explained.

“It’s a thing that makes you sensual and warm and maternal. It could be about breasts but I don’t have huge tits so you gotta work with what you got.”

So even though Simpson wrote on Valentine’s Day that she and husband Eric Johnson are still “getting it,” we’re guessing Jessica does not exactly get what this song is all about.

Let’s hope that’s the case at least.

Otherwise we may need to call Child Protection Services on her and Johnson.

Milkshake Squirrel Totally Bumps Pizza Rat from the Headlines

Sorry, Pizza Rat. But you are SO yesterday"s news.

A new animal in New York City has sky-rocketed to viral fame. Are you ready to meet Milkshake Squirrel?!?

The woman filming this video and her friends weren’t exactly prepared to do so, but they couldn’t help marveling over the furry little guy after they noticed him scrummaging through a garbage can.

The squirrel is apparently of chocolate milkshakes from Shake Shack, as he snaps up a thrown-away cup of that beverage from the trash can, jumps back over the fence and gulps it all down… right in front of his brand new fan club.

Watch as they laugh over the squirrel and then issue a warning: Careful, dude. You"re gonna get a stomach ache!