Security Guard Jerks Off to Cheerleaders: NSFW ALERT!

Look. We"ve all been there.

We"ve all been teenagers, a bit curious, a bit confused and all kinds of titillated by the opposite sex.

So we can understand what the young man in the following video is thinking.

He"s thinking this: 

BOOBS! BOOBS! BOOBS! OH MY GOD, SO MANY BOOBS!

See, the young man is serving as a security guard for the San Diego Chargers in this explicit footage, working the sidelines at this past Sunday"s game against the Oakland Raiders.

But that"s not all he"s working.

He"s also working his own penis, in a pretty intense manner by the looks of things.

This video popped up on Facebook yesterday, quickly making the viral rounds because… well…

Because it features a security guard standing in broad daylight, directly in front of a group of cheerleaders (not to mention tens of thousands of fans in the stands), very clearly pleasuring himself.

Talk about unsportsmanlike conduct!

No wonder the Chargers are likely moving to Los Angeles next season!

There"s a flag at nearly full staff on the play!

This is a clear example of illegal hands to the… head!

Move over, Odell Beckham Jr. There"s someone else out there who excels at using one hand!

We"ve never seen such a clear case of holding!

But seriously folks….

The team has been unable to identify the horny employee, who has reportedly been fired by Elite Security, but San Diego did issue a statement that reads as follows:

"We are aware of the disturbing actions of an Elite security staff member at Sunday’s game. We apologize to any fans who may have witnessed the incident."

And we apologize to anyone who clicks PLAY on the following video. Consider yourself warned.

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Jerry Ferrara -- My Ex-Pals at Fat Sal"s Are Big Fat Jerks!!

Jerry Ferrara’s pissed at his former friends and sandwich biz partners for suing him, and he’s fired back with a million-dollar countersuit for screwing him over … according to the docs. The “Entourage” star says he co-founded Fat Sal’s with 2 of…

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Olivia Munn: I Didn"t Get Plastic Surgery, You Jerks!

She can’t win, it seems.

Since January, many have assumed that Ride-Along 2′s Olivia Munn has gotten plastic surgery to enhance her facial features.

“When your face changes because of makeup, it’s hard to let people know that you’re not actually doing surgery or fillers,” Munn, who covers May’s issue of Fashion, explained.

“I posted the picture on Instagram because the glam team had worked very hard. People were like, ‘What did she do to her face?’ A week later, I looked completely different,” she added

“As an actor, you can be completely transformative and take on different roles. As an individual in the world, it’s a totally different story―we live in a time where there’s so many pictures that bring so much scrutiny.

“Being multi-ethnic – I’m half-Chinese, half-white – brings up a whole set of complications that people don’t even think about when it comes to being photographed.

“I have more of a white appearance on the outside, but my bone structure is very much Asian. I have high cheekbones and smaller eyes.

“When you put shimmer on the inside of my eyes, I immediately look cross-eyed. If you put too heavy of an eyelash on me, it looks like my eyes are halfway closed.”

Also contributing to a change in Munn’s overall appearance is a 12-lb weight loss, thanks to four months of sword and stunt training for X-Men: Apocalypse (out May 27th).

View Slideshow: Celebrities Who Have Admitted to Plastic Surgery

The Real Housewives of Atlanta Season 8 Episode 13 Recap: Jamaican Jerks, Chickens

“I still have my Jesus with me, so I’m not gonna knock a bitch upside her head, but had she touched me, y’all would’ve seen a whole ‘nother side of Kim Fields.”

– Kim Fields

Watch The Real Housewives of Atlanta Season 8 Episode 13 Online

On The Real Housewives of Atlanta Season 8 Episode 13, the women jetted off to Jamaica for some fun in the sun with their men in tow.

NeNe Leakes big appearance was the big storyline coming in … 

… but she wasn’t the one who ruined the vacay in epic fashion.

Obviously, if you watch The Real Housewives of Atlanta online at all, you know that the shade-throwing drama never stays in the ATL.

In fact, it typically increases whenever there’s a trip involved.

During Cynthia Bailey’s meeting with Kim Fields and (the unbelievably immature) Kenya Moore, the trip began to go south in a hurry.

Moore accused Bailey of being unprofessional for going with Kim’s pitch for the ad, despite Kenya having flaked on the pitch meeting.

Then she called out Kim personally, and in a brazenly ridiculous middle school move, actually pulled Kim’s chair away from the table.

While Kim still happened to be sitting in it.

Fields (see above quote) kept her cool despite plenty of reasons to smack the ISH out of her adversary, while Cynthia just sat there.

Why Bailey didn’t grow a pair, own the decision to go with Kim’s pitch and shut down this display is beyond us, but it is what it is now.

At dinner later, when Peter asked what was wrong and what triggered this massive beef, More was still bitter and in a fighting mood.

“I would like to just take one of these lanterns and set my ass on fire than talk about this” Kenya snapped, to which Peter responded:

“Someone give her the motherf–king lantern.”

As Kim began to explain her side of things, Kenya up and left, after which Kim’s husband Chris laid it out for Cynthia plainly: 

“As boss, you’re the only one that can [this]. Simply go to Kenya and say I made a decision and I need you as my friend to live with it.”

“And also say, ‘You’re not my BFF,"” NeNe added.

Of course, it’s not that easy, and the way in which Cynthia characterized their relationship made its way to Kenya the very next morning.

Kenya wouldn’t let that crucial point go either, eventually forcing Cynthia to tell her flat out: “In my mind, we’re not best friends yet.”

That, friends, is just a bitter pill to swallow.

View Slideshow: 20 Really Big Real Housewives Scandals