Showing posts with label Royally. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Royally. Show all posts

Thursday, July 12, 2018

George Lopez Pees On Trump"s Walk of Fame Star, Royally Pisses Off MAGA Crowd

Ever since Donald Trump was elected president, his star on the Walk of Fame has been a common target for some very amusing vandalism.


Now, “amusing” is not a word one would normally use to describe George Lopez, a man who typically favors the Adam Sandler “I’m rich, therefore I don’t have to be funny” approach to comedy, but we’re willing to make an exception in this case.




Lopez recently pretended to take a leak on the Donald’s star, and TMZ obtained video of the righteous micturition.


Not exactly comic gold on its own, but the response to Lopez’s innocuous gag has been flat-out hilarious.


According to TMZ, dozens of grown-ass adults have called and texted the LAPD demanding that Lopez be arrested for the prank.


The department says more than 50 individuals have contacted them to report Lopez’s “crime,” thus far, and the complaints just keep pouring in.


Hilariously, many of the offended parties seem not to realize that Lopez didn’t actually pee on the star, a fact that’s abundantly clear to anyone who’s watched the video of the incident.


One caller described Lopez’s actions as “sick, deplorable, offensive and disrespectful.”






Another fell for the prank harder than Sarah Palin being duped by Sacha Baron Cohen:


“If this was any normal person they would be arrested for indecent exposure,” claims the outraged citizen, who apparently believes that penises and water bottles are interchangeable as far as the law is concerned.


“[Does] the Hollywood elite think they’re above the law and you guys took an oath to obtain the Law.”


It’s moments like this where you almost have to marvel at Trump’s mind control powers.


Dude’s a born-rich, Ivy League-educated billionaire who’s managed to convince tens of millions of Americans that he’s on their side in the war against “the elites” — a group that apparently includes George Lopez.



To be fair, we imagine this is quite the triggering event for some folks in the MAGA crowd.


A wealthy Mexican-American literally peeing on Donald Trump’s name is a waking nightmare for most of these people.


Which is exactly why we encourage every brown-skinned person in the Greater Los Angeles area to head to Hollywood Boulevard and empty their bladders in the name of freedom.


Don’t worry if you’re not actually Mexican or rich.


The people who are most likely to be pissed off by your patriotic piddle will assume you just backstroked across the Rio Grande and fell into some cushy seven-figure gig that was meant for them.


You’ll have ‘em scrambling for their safe spaces in no time!



ReadMore…

Friday, December 29, 2017

Meghan Markle: Why Her Father is Royally Upset at Prince Harry!

Hey, so, remember how Prince Harry kind of threw shade at Meghan Markle’s family?


Apparently, his offhand comment about how well his fiancee was getting along with his family managed to enrage all of his in-laws.


Including Meghan Markle’s father, who is reportedly “extremely hurt.”



Recently, the Ginger Prince himself spoke about how well Meghan Markle was getting along with the royal family.


Unfortunately, Harry may have gone a little too far in his praise.


At one point, he said this:


“She’s getting in there and it’s the family that I suppose she’s never had.”


That seems like a tremendous insult hurled at Meghan’s family — his future in-laws.


And it’s not going over well.



Thomas Markle Jr. reports to The Daily Mail that his father, Thomas Markle, is “extremely hurt” by Prince Harry’s words.


He spoke up in defense of his father’s family skills.


“He dedicated the majority of all his time and everything to her.”


Thomas Jr. is 51; 15 years older than Meghan. That tremendous age gap makes us wonder just how close they were.


“He made sure she had what she needed to be successful and get to where she’s at today.”


Having what you need to become successful isn’t all there is to family.



Thomas Jr. continues to defend his dad and Meghan’s upbringing.


“She’s had a really good family.”


Wendy Williams has pointed out that Meghan Markle’s family has had its … troubles, to say the least.


“We were as close as we could be, as tight as we could be, that’s what we were.”


Those are some interesting qualifiers for Thomas Jr. to use.


“We’d get together on Christmases, on holidays, on birthdays, on Thanksgivings.”


That sounds like the relationship that most people have with cousins who live out of state, not with their immediate family.


“It was always somewhere, even though we lived in different parts of [Los Angeles], we still all got together.”



We should probably mention that Thomas Jr. hasn’t actually spoken to his sister since 2011.


That’s nearly 7 years, folks.


“Obviously, she had a family. She was very privileged. She got everything she ever wanted.”


It’s always suspicious to hear one person say that another always got whatever they wanted. No one can speak to that but the person in question.


“We did the best that we could in terms of getting together for holidays and whatnot.”



Thomas Jr. follows up his defense of the Markle family by adding that he’d really love an invitation to the royal wedding.


“I don’t know if she gets to invite who she wants. But she’ll reach out if she wants me there, she’ll call me.”


That seems less likely after this interview, don’t you think?


“She knows where to find me. But that’s up to her, there’s no pressure.”


By virtue of saying this in an interview, he’s applying pressure. But he also makes it clear that his interest in attending the wedding is hardly personal:


“I wouldn’t mind seeing my little sister have the biggest wedding in the world. That would be incredible. … If my dad doesn’t walk her down the aisle, then I will.”



Before Thomas Jr. talked about how neat it would be to see his estranged sister get married, another Markle had already weighed in.


Meghan Markle’s half-sister clapped back at Prince Harry. Apparently, that’s just Samantha Grant’s style, as she said:


“She has a large family. She always did. Our dad is amazing and completely self sacrificing. We made it so that she had two houses. How fun it was!”


Look, you can put a positive spin on divorce all that you like. Sometimes, a divorce is the best thing that ever happens to a family.


But just because you’re happy with the way that things were doesn’t mean that everyone was.


If, as appears to be the case, Meghan has told Harry less-than-happy feelings about her family growing up, those are her experiences to share.


It’s wildly uncool for her siblings to “correct” her feelings just because they want their names in some headlines.



ReadMore…

Friday, September 1, 2017

Chris Pine Royally Screws You Like a True 14th Century King!!!

It’s safe to say Chris Pine likes horsing around … so excuse the salty bird. Chris — who plays Scottish King Robert the Bruce — was on the set of his Netflix period drama “Outlaw King” and he gave the photogs an interesting welcome.…


ReadMore…

Chris Pine Royally Screws You Like a True 14th Century King!!!

It’s safe to say Chris Pine likes horsing around … so excuse the salty bird. Chris — who plays Scottish King Robert the Bruce — was on the set of his Netflix period drama “Outlaw King” and he gave the photogs an interesting welcome.…


ReadMore…

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

Blake Lively Instagrams About Her Butt, Royally Pisses Off Internet

Back in 1992, Sir Mix-A-Lot released “Baby Got Back,” his famous ode to big asses that many credit with helping to launch the national butt obsession that continues to this day.


Needless, to say Kim Kardashian owes a lot to the rapper. Blake Lively, on the other hand, is learning the hard way today that Mix-A-Lot’s lyrics are dangerous in the wrong hands.



Last night, Blake posted the above photo of herself at the 2016 Cannes Film Festival with a caption reading, “LA face with an Oakland booty.”


It’s a line from “Baby Got Back,” and Blake clearly meant to call attention to her proudest assets because…having paparazzi scream her name while she walks the red carpet in a gown that costs more than most people’s cars doesn’t do enough for her ego?


We’re not really sure, but the caption did not go over well with some of Blakes’ Instagram followers. 


Many have complained that the remark is racially insensitive, as the implication of the lyric is that women from the primarily black and Latino city of Oakland are more blessed in the backside area, and Blake is essentially reducing them to a punchline here.


It’s not the first time that Blake has been accused of co-opting or other cultures or displaying a lack of compassion for the plight of black people in America.


Last year, Lively wrote about her love for the style antebellum South on her short-lived Preserve website.


In case you’re not familiar “antebellum” means pre-war, which in this case means pre-Civil War, which means Blake was waxing nostalgic about a time before slavery was abolished.


The piece was poorly received and may have contributed to the site being shut down.


Most of her press coverage lately has centered around rumors about Blake’s second pregnancy (which she has yet to confirm), and while the 28-year-old was reportedly not happy with the invasion of her privacy, she likely preferred the bump-watch to this current controversy. 


We’re not gonna wade into the debate over whether Blake’s caption was inappropriate or simply an innocent (if somewhat insensitive) joke, but we will say we had no idea she was packing such a sizable ‘donk.


And for that, we thank her.


Friday, November 6, 2015

16 Times Prince Harry Made Us Royally Swoon


Life & Style has a story claiming that Prince Harry has knocked up some girl and fully intends to the do the right thing by making her Princess of Genovia The Remote Kingdom Of Premarital Sex Sins.


That story is a load of crap, but let"s focus on the main point here: Harry is a dream boat, and pretty much any photo of him will make the ovaries stand to attention and say, "I volunteer!"


Without further ado, the photos of Prince Henry of Wales that make us go a bit weak in the knees.




1. That Scruff


Prince harrys scruff

What are you seeing is the scruff of dreams. I’ll see myself out…



2. Camp Bastion, Afghanistan


Captain wales in afghanistan

If you are telling me that you are able to resist a prince in fatigues who is ready to fight the good fight, then this is where we part ways. Good day. I SAID GOOD DAY, SIR!



3. Donning An Apron


Prince harry wearing an apron

I don’t care if his creation is burnt to a crisp. I’ll eat whatever he makes.



4. New York Groove


Prince harry wearing sunglasses

That is straight-up sex-on-a-stick.



5. Cooing Over A Baby


Prince harry cooing over a baby

I KNOW.



6. He’s In a Swing


Prince harry being swung by children

Isn’t my future husband wonderful with youths?


View Slideshow