Monday, February 15, 2016

Martin Shkreli: Robbed of $15 Million While Attempting to Purchase Kanye West Album

When most people want to buy an album, they open up iTunes and shell out the necessary $ 9.99.


When Martin Shkreli wants to buy an album, he wants fork over more cash than most people make their entire lives so that no one else can ever listen to it.



This obnoxious habit began when the much-reviled “pharma bro” paid $ 2 million for the sole copy of a Wu Tang Clan album that had previously been stored in a vault in Morocco.


The odd arrangement was orchestrated by Wu Tang members with the idea that whoever purchased the disc would in some way distribute it to the public. 


They didn’t account for someone like Shkreli, who appears to have no plans to share the album with anyone outside of his inner circle.


Apparently, Shkreli is really relishing the title of Most-Hated Man in Hip Hop, as he attempted to pull a similar stunt last week when he offered to buy the sole rights to Kanye West’s new album, The Life of Pablo, for $ 10 million.


Unfortunately for Shkreli, Kanye’s people saw through the offer as an obvious attempt to prevent, or at least delay, the album’s release.


Even more unfortunate for Shkreli is the fact that karma’s a bitch.


The 32-year-old former hedge fund manager – who first made headlines for jacking up the price of a life-saving medication when he was CEO of Turing Pharmaceuticals – upped his offer to $ 15 million following Kanye’s star-studded release party.


With that kind of cash on the table, Shkreli was bound to generate some interest.


Hilariously, that interest came from someone who’s probably never even met Kanye.


Shkreli took to Twitter yesterday alleging that  he had been bilked of $ 15 million in Bitcoin by someone who identified himself as a friend of Kanye’s named Daquan.


Apparently, Shkreli was under the impression that Daquan would pass the money along to Kanye, who he believed had agreed to sell the rights to the album.


You’d think a guy who’s famous for screwing people over wouldn’t be quite so trusting.


“WHO THE F-CK HAS MY FIFTEEN MILLION DOLLARS??????” an increasingly irate Shkreli tweeted yesterday afternoon.


“SOMEONE NAMED DAQUAN SAID HE WAS KANYES BOY AND I SIGND THE DEAL TO BUY PALBO AND SENT THE BITCOIN. CALL THE POLICE THIS IS BULLSH-T


“I hope you all enjoy this stupid music SO much and the fact it has brought me so much pain and suffering. I quit rap.”


The irony of that statement is probably lost on Martin, but we’re sure there are many people who enjoy the album much more precisely for that reason.