Selena Gomez is the undisputed Queen of Instagram.
This is not mere opinion.
The singer ended 2016 as the Most-Liked individual on this social media platform, while she was also featured in 8 of the top 10 most popular Instagram photos last year.
Those are quite the impressive accomplishments.
But heavy is the head that wears this crown.
So explains Gomez in the latest issue of Vogue.
“As soon as I became the most followed person on Instagram, I sort of freaked out,” Selena tells the magazine, explaining further:
“It had become so consuming to me. It’s what I woke up to and went to sleep to. I was an addict, and it felt like I was seeing things I didn’t want to see, like it was putting things in my head that I didn’t want to care about.”
Sort of fascinating, right?
And also understandable? How this sort of thing can take over someone’s life?
“I always end up feeling like shit when I look at Instagram,” the 24-year-old admits. “Which is why I’m kind of under the radar, ghosting it a bit.”
How did Selena go about solving this problem and improving her mental health in the process?
She actually deleted the app from her phone and says she doesn’t know the password for her account.
It’s true; her assistant now posts on her behalf.
The decision to step away from the spotlight a bit came after Gomez entered treatment in 2016, which wasn’t for addiction, burnout or an eating disorder.
She sort of just needed a break.
“People so badly wanted me to be authentic, and when that happened, finally, it was a huge release. I’m not different from what I put out there,” she says.
“I’ve been very vulnerable with my fans, and sometimes I say things I shouldn’t. But I have to be honest with them. I feel that’s a huge part of why I’m where I am.”
The artist, who previously spent two weeks at a rehab facility in 2014 for Lupus, chose to seek additional help after canceling her Revival tour last summer.
“Tours are a really lonely place for me,” she tells Vogue.
“My self-esteem was shot. I was depressed, anxious. I started to have panic attacks right before getting onstage, or right after leaving the stage. Basically I felt I wasn’t good enough, wasn’t capable.
“I felt I wasn’t giving my fans anything, and they could see it – which, I think, was a complete distortion.
“I was so used to performing for kids.”
Gomez is back in the news because she’s dating The Weeknd.
But she doesn’t address that romance in this interview.
Here’s a look at other topics she does touch on, however:
The psychiatric treatment she received last year: “You have no idea how incredible it felt to just be with six girls, real people who couldn’t give two shits about who I was, who were fighting for their lives. It was one of the hardest things I’ve done, but it was the best thing I’ve done.”
Dialectical Behavior Therapy: “DBT has completely changed my life. I wish more people would talk about therapy. We girls, we’re taught to be almost too resilient, to be strong and sexy and cool and laid-back, the girl who’s down. We also need to feel allowed to fall apart.”
Her Disney Past: “I worked with Disney for four years. It’s a very controlled machine. They know what they represent, and there was, 100 percent, a way to go about things…
“For a guy there’s a way to rebel that can work for you. But for a woman, that can backfire. It’s hard not to be a cliché, the child star gone wrong. I did respect my fans and what I had, but I was also figuring out what I was passionate about and how far I was willing to go.”
Fame: “I’m a late bloomer. I grew up around adults, but in terms of getting out, having friends. At times I really didn’t know anything but my job… My mom gave up her whole life for me. Where we’re from, you don’t really leave. So when I started gaining all this success, there was a guilt that came with it. I thought, Do I deserve this?”
The Downfalls of Fame: “I think seventeen people have my phone number right now. Maybe two are famous Look, I love what I do, and I’m aware of how lucky I am, but, how can I say this without sounding weird?
“I just really can’t wait for people to forget about me.”