Barack Obama will be looking for a job in January.
And while we doubt it"s a possibility, let"s all hope the current Commander-in-Chief considers becoming a stand-up comedian.
Because it"s clear, based on the following jabs n jokes at the 2016 White House Correspondents" Dinner, that the leader of the free world is an expert with his delivery and timing… and material.
(NOTE: Watch the full speech now.)
1. Look Who’s Here!
Kendall Jenner is also here and we had a chance to meet backstage. She seems like a very nice young woman. I’m not exactly sure what she does, but I am told that my Twitter mentions are about to go through the roof.
2. This is Not What I Had in Mind
Eight years ago, I said it was time to change the tone of our politics. In hindsight, I clearly should’ve been more specific.
3. On His Rising Popularity
The last time I was this high, I was trying to decide on my major.
4. Anxious to Leave
You might’ve heard that someone jumped the White House fence last week. But I have to give the Secret Service credit. They found Michelle, brought her back. She’s safe back at home now. It’s only nine more months, baby. Settle down!
5. On Visiting England, Seeing Shakespeare and Playing Golf with David Cameron
Just in case anybody is still debating whether I’m black enough, I think that settles the debate.
6. A Shout-Out to Harriet
If this material works well, I’m gonna use it at Goldman-Sachs next year. Earn me some serious Tubmans.