Farrah Abraham, Debra Danielsen Battle For Custody of Sohpia!

As you’ve likely heard by now, Farrah Abraham was arrested last week after allegedly assaulting a male staffer at the Beverly Hills Hotel.

Sources say the victim was not seriously injured, and the sight of Farrah telling the cops to go f–k themselves remains hilarious, so consider this one of those situations that sucked for everyone involved, but that still allows you to laugh at all the principal players guilt-free.

In fact, the only one who’s deserving of your sympathy here is Farrah’s 9-year-old daughter, Sophia, who was in the hotel at the time of the incident.

Insiders insist that Sophia did not witness the attack on what we assume was a bartender who had the gall to cut Farrah off after her 17th margarita.

However, the fact that Sophia was in the building and thus had to be turned over to the care of a nanny while her mother was behind bars has raised concerns about Farrah’s fitness as a parent.

Not surprisingly, Farrah’s parents are offering two very different takes on the situation.

“We have seen this before,” Michael Abraham recently told Radar Online.

“The situation was blown out of proportion, a misunderstanding that occurred and there was no battery or trespassing charges,” he adds.

“The police were doing their job even though they were misinformed and lied to by others at the hotel.”

Debra Danielsen, however, is said to be deeply concerned about her granddaughter’s well-being and “hopes to hire a lawyer who can possibly help her gain custody time with Sophia.”

It seems that even before last week’s violence, Deb objected to Farrah’s decision to pull Sophia out of school so that she could tag along on her mother’s world travels.

“[Sophia] needs to be with her family, not about strangers and volatility and her mother being arrested,” Debra told Radar.

“It’s very disgusting,” Danielsen added.

“She needs to go to school… She needs to not be dragged on a party all over the world.”

It seems Debra is taking steps to ensure that Sophia will be spending more time in stable environments and hopes to secure partial custody of the girl.

Farrah has yet to comment on the impending court battle, but Michael certainly has some thoughts on the situation.

“If Debra takes that route she will be only making the divide between her and Farrah only worse,” he says.

“If Debra wants to be able to see the girls (Sophia), Debra needs to look at herself and CHANGE. Stop selling disgusting stories about Farrah which fraudulently diagnose mental illness and poor parenting.” 

Michael goes on to accuse Deb of exploiting the situation to try and boost her own public profile:

“If Debra really cared, she would have listened to my request while we were finding out the details and facts,” Michael says.

“It’s NEVER about doing what a parent should be doing, which is supporting her daughter and NOT THROWING HER FAMILY UNDER A BUS for money or to be relevant.”

As for the accusation that Sophia currently isn’t receiving an education, Michael insists she’s getting the best education possible by trotting the globe with Farrah.

“The fact is Sophia is in school,” he says, “a virtual school that permits her to do her lessons, homework, and activities anywhere.” 

He goes on to argue that Farrah was brought up in a similar fashion:

“World travel is excellent education for a child’s future,” Michael says.

“Debra must have forgot that we did the same with both Ashley and Farrah when they were children – yes they traveled the world with us!”

And look how Farrah turned out! Checkmate, Deb!

View Slideshow: Farrah Abraham: ARRESTED For Attacking Hotel Employee!!! (Updated)

ReadMore…

Debra Danielsen: I Need to Get Sophia Away from Farrah Abraham!!

Late Tuesday night, Farrah Abraham was arrested after allegedly striking an employee at a Beverly Hills hotel. Police say that she was intoxicated, but Farrah blames everyone else. Classic Farrah.

Her mother has expressed her concern for her 9-year-old granddaughter. She says that Sophia would be better off with her.

In the mean time, Farrah has released her own statement about the incident. And it is bonkers.

Debra Danielsen is horrified by Farrah’s arrest. It doesn’t sound like she’s surprised, or even especially worked up over her daughter.

As she tells RadarOnline, Debra fears for her granddaughter, 9-year-old Sophia.

“She needs to be with her family,” Danielsen insists through tears.

Farrah is her daughter, but she’s also an adult. Sophia is just 9 years old. Her mother’s arrest could be traumatic. Especially since Farrah remained in jail for a while.

And Danielsen says that she knows exactly what isn’t a healthy environment for a child.

Sophia, she says, needs to be somwhere that’s not “Not [around] strangers and volatility and her mother being arrested.”

For the record, Sophia was at the hotel, but was up in her room and was presumably asleep. Hours earlier, she had been hanging out with her mom by the pool.

Reports say that Sophia remained with her nanny during her mother’s time behind bars.

Debra Danielsen, who is clearly feeling very emotional about this situation, laments:

“It’s very disgusting,” she says.

It sounds like there’s so much more than just Farrah’s arrest that’s on her mind, and it all comes boiling to the surface.

The emotional grandmother says: “She needs to go to school…”

Farrah homeschools Sophia, which … is probably very interesting but perhaps not what is best for the innocent 9-year-old.

Keep in mind that requirements for homeschooling vary from state to state, but many of those requirements are inadequate and none require a healthy level of socialization.

Danielsen makes it clear that she’s worried about more than just Sophia’s education and socialization.

“She needs to not be dragged on a party all over the world,” she says.

Yeah.

Visiting places like Capri is cool, but arguably not as cool as being a well-adjusted child who knows how to interact with strangers, make friends, and function in society.

(Which we of course hope that, no matter the obstacles, Sophia will nonetheless manage to do)

Farrah Abraham was released from jail on Wednesday, and took to Instagram to share the news.

“Looking great in @prettylittlething,” she writes beside a paparazzi shot of her exit.

That’s right, folks; she begins her post with some of the least appropriate product placement that we have ever seen.

“No charges & no jail time,” she brags.

This is Farrah, so … the truth of that statement, if any, is unclear.

Farrah begins her rant, which takes on the usual word salad elements that remind us to be worried about what she may be teaching Sophia.

“I chose this life and I handle being targeted as a public figure & public punching bag,” she says.

So … she seems to be suggesting that she is being framed or harassed because she is famous-ish.

“ALL is Fair In Farrah’s world,” she says. “I will never believe the lies that people need to sell to make a dollar off me.”

Why would someone believe lies about themselves? Sorry, we know better than to try to make sense of Farrah’s words.

The rant continues.

“Happy it’s all recorded and documented,” Farrah says. “As I should never feel unsafe and be targeted at a hotel I’m staying at.”

She accuses the hotel itself of misconduct.

“The Beverly Hills hotel truly allowed misconduct by staff to a paying guest.” She then adds: “There’s no need for me or anyone else to be treated this way.”

Farrah is accused of having gotten into an argument with another guest, and then of having struck and pulled the ear of a security guard.

Farrah also has a bone to pick with the police.

“The Beverly Hills Police officers should stop having power trips and lying and selling stories to TMZ,” she writes. “While you let all of Beverly Hills be robbed, car break ins, stealing go on…”

We must have missed that story about the largest heist in history — entire neighborhoods of multimillionaires — stripped bare while the ingenious thieves used Farrah as a distraction.

“Focus on really protecting the public and doing good for Beverly Hills,” Farrah advises. “Instead of creating made up problems.”

Farrah is a real piece of work, but there’s no sign that Sophia was actually exposed to any of the hotel drama.

Still, it may have been a scary experience for Sophia. When mommy’s in jail, you can feel alone and powerless and afraid for the future.

But while Debra Danielsen may have been responding emotionally to Farrah’s arrest, she has a point.

Maybe Sophia deserves to have a real life beyond her mother’s globetrotting adventures.

That said … Danielsen might not be the answer. Remember, this is the woman who raised Farrah Abraham.

This is also the sort of mother who gives out tearful, backstabbing interviews while her daughter is in police custody.

Sophia deserves … so much better.

View Slideshow: Farrah Abraham: ARRESTED For Attacking Hotel Employee!!! (Updated)

ReadMore…

Debra Danielsen: Viewers Won"t Accept Mackenzie McKee!

Teen Mom OG fans know that Mackenzie McKee is joining the show and replacing Farrah Abraham, after Farrah got “hate crimed” (fired).

Mackenzie’s no stranger to the Teen Mom franchise, but does she have what it takes to fill the void left when Farrah was cast out?

Farrah’s own mother weighs in.

Remember Teen Mom 3? The world wasn’t ready for Teen Mom 3. Or, at least, that’s what audiences apparently decided.

But Mackenzie Douthit McKee made enough of a splash that, after Farrah Abraham was fired for being a nightmare of a human being (though she was also unfortunately shamed for her sex work), people kept bringing up Mackenzie as a possible replacement.

We know that those are some big, obnoxious shoes to fill.

(Mackenzie is also reportedly being considered for Teen Mom 2 after Jenelle Eason’s future on the show was cast in doubt — either way, Mackenzie would replace a widely hated star)

Now it’s been reported that Mackenzie is joining the Teen Mom OG cast, specifically.

There’s no way to know for sure how fans will react to seeing a different person on the show or the new “vibe” that each episode will bring.

But people have already formed some strong opinions.

In an interview with RadarOnline, Farrah Abraham’s mom Debra Danielsen says that she has misgivings about the idea of Mackenzie filling the void that Farrah left behind.

For starters, she’s just not sure about Mackenzie’s appeal.

“I don’t know how relatable a female bodybuilder is.”

Maybe, though other reality shows have featured female bodybuilders who turned out to be very popular with viewers (just look at 90 Day Fiance‘s Paola Mayfield).

Mackenzie is also married to the father of her children and has an enthusiastic fanbase.

“It’s a bizarre choice knowing our demographic.”

It sounds like maybe Debra herself doesn’t know what to think of a female bodybuilder and might be projecting that onto others.

“I feel like it’s a little disjointed.”

Aside from her doubts as to whether Middle America or key age demographics or whatever will run screaming for the hills at the sight of Mackenzie McKee’s Herculean physique, Debra seems to wish Mackenzie well.

And she feels that Mackenzie’s one big selling point is … her own mother.

“She has a relatable story with her mom being ill.”

Mackenzie’s mother’s cancer battle is serious. She has been diagnosed with Stage IV brain cancer.

(Mackenzie’s mom has apparently been struggling to pay her hospital bills, so a lot of fans welcome the idea of Mackenzie raking in a Teen Mom sized paycheck)

“If Mackenzie took over there would be a new dimension. I hope she does well.”

Debra can’t really pretend to be neutral in all of this — she’s talking about her own daughter’s replacement.

Plus, Debra has some sentimental attachments to Teen Mom of her own.

“I love the cast and crew because we’ve been together for 10 years.”

She spoke of how she misses being part of the show.

“It’s personally very hard for me not to be there. It’s very difficult.”

That’s show business, folks.

Debra Danielsen may be right about people having trouble reconciling a devoted mother with a female bodybuilder. Some folks live in an isolated bubble.

But some question whether that will be any harder for fans to deal with than a sex worker.

In any case, she’s definitely right that the show will be different with Mackenzie than it was with Farrah.

And by “different,” we mean “better.”

The Teen Mom franchise has been criticized for portraying the moms in a negative light. Mackenzie, who largely has her act together, could really change that and provide a nice contrast.

We’ll all find out together.

View Slideshow: Mackenzie McKee: Secrets and Scandals of the Newest Teen Mom Star

ReadMore…

Debra Danielsen: Farrah Abraham Beat Me Up!

After a decade of absurd behavior thoroughly documented by reality TV cameras, we thought we’d seen the very worst that Farrah Abraham had to offer.

But then Farrah’s mother, Debra Danielsen, wrote a memoir, and we realized we’ve only scratched the surface of the dysfunction and depravity in the Abraham family.

Teen Mom tell-alls are nothing new, but Deb’s seems to be offering a unique spin on the genre.

For starters, Danielsen went with the completely bonkers title of Vapor: A True Story of How I Fell Victim to Catfishing.

And while that might lead you to believe that she’s gonna take you into Nev and Max territory, all the excerpts thus far have basically been lengthy justifications of Deb’s hatred for her daughter and ex-husband.

Earlier this week, we learned that Michael Abraham did drugs and cheated on Deb while they were married.

(Or so Danielsen claims.)

Now it’s Farrah’s turn to get roasted, and Deb is once again bringing the heat.

In a Vapor excerpt published today by Radar Online, Debra basically claims her famous daughter is a violent psychopath.

If you’ve seen Farrah beat up Teen Mom producers and generally act like a lunatic for the past ten years, then that might not come as much of a surprise to you.

In the past Farrah has claimed that her mom “beat her bloody,” and on at least one occasion, she called the police on Deb,

Now, Danielsen is saying that she was attacked by Farrah, who then called the police to make it look like she was the victim.

“Farrah had beat me up, I had been crying, I was in a large amount of pain,” Deb writes with cavalier disregard for the concept of run-on sentences.

“After all of this, she had quietly gone upstairs to call the police and turn me in for hitting her.”

Danielsen concedes that her wrist made contact with her daughter’s lip while they were struggling and that Farrah was left with “one drop of blood on her lip.”

Of course, no discussion of the life of Farrah would be complete without some mention of the infamous Backdoor Teen Mom sex tape.

Deb recalls learning about the tape and confronting Farrah, who wasn’t exactly interested in a rational discussion.

“She snapped back and said that Michael and I overreact and ‘need to get our sh-t together,"” Deb writes.

“She didn’t need us embarrassing her. That hurt.”

Being called embarrassing by Farrah freakin’ Abraham? Yeah, that’s gotta sting just a bit.

Watch Teen Mom OG online to be reminded of just how embarrassing Farrah truly is.

View Slideshow: Farrah Abraham: A Tumultuous Teen Mom Life in GIFs

ReadMore…

Debra Danielsen: Farrah Abraham"s Dad Is a Cheating Druggie!

It’s hard to imagine a more perfect reality TV star than Farrah Abraham.

We know what you’re thinking, and you’re absolutely right–Farrah is unintelligent, rude to the point of cruelty, delusional, and almost impossibly self-centered.

And that’s exactly what makes her such a great fit for reality television.

If you’re unfamiliar with Farrah, you might watch an episode of Teen Mom OG and wonder where such a person comes from.

Fortunately, we have the answer.

You see, Farrah is the product of two profoundly effed-up individuals.

There’s her mother, Debra Danielsen, who’s basically what Farrah will be like in 20 years if she figures out how to get Xanax prescriptions from three different doctors.

Then there’s her father, Michael Abraham, who’s basically Ned Flanders if he were driven quietly insane by the knowledge that his daughter became a gosh-dang-diddily porn star, even though she doesn’t need the money.

You may think that the world has all the Deb and Michael it needs thanks to their frequent appearances on TMOG, but apparently Deb disagrees.

She’s penned a memoir with the curious title of Vapor, and in it, she reveals that Mike was a straight-up d-bag during their marriage:

“The big problem in our relationship was that Michael felt disconnected from me because I refused to take illegal drugs that he enjoyed taking,” Danielsen writes.

Now, the book is light on specifics, so it’s possible that she’s talking about something as innocent as smoking weed, which would really damage her street cred, and possibly bring an end to Deb’s rap career.

But she goes on to claim that Michael would get all hopped on goofballs and then run out and cheat on her.

“I demanded fidelity in our relationship,” Danielsen writes.

“Michael could no longer deal with either one of these positions, which I hold dear to my heart.”

The Abraham family doesn’t have the greatest history when it comes to honesty, but Deb says she can corroborate her claims with letters written to her by a repentant Michael:

“Michael told me he was sorry for his affairs,” Deb says.

“He asked for my forgiveness and begged me to reconsider, but I just couldn’t do it anymore. He has been involved in countless affairs.”

Deb also claims that she “worked out every day for 15 years” in order to keep Mike happy, but it wasn’t enough.

For his part, Michael denies the affairs, and claims he never once commented on his ex-wife’s weight.

“I’m a very intelligent man,” Abraham says.

“You never talk about a woman’s age or weight. Debra is a very beautiful woman.”

Sounds like we’re gonna need a response memoir from Mike!

You might think you’re sick of these two, but if Farrah really gets fired by MTV, you’ll be fiending for more Mike and Deb in no time!

Watch Teen Mom OG online for more on the gloriously messed-up Abraham clan.

View Slideshow: Farrah Abraham: From 16 & Pregnant to Live Stream Cam Girl!

ReadMore…

Debra Danielsen Got Married and Farrah Abraham Gave a Toast!

Farrah Abraham and her mother, Debra Danielsen, have had a very complicated relationship.

But that didn’t mean that Farrah couldn’t make it to her own mother’s wedding. Yes, Debra got married this weekend. And Farrah gave a toast.

And though MTV’s cameras weren’t there to cover it, we can still tell you what happened.

Last week’s big drama was Farrah Abraham getting “fired” from Teen Mom.

The initial story was that it’s because of Farrah Abraham’s live sex shows, like the one where she stripped down and masturbated for paying viewers.

It resulted in Farrah canceling her much anticipated anal sex livestream that was to take place a week ago.

As it turns out, all of this may have really just been over the fact that nobody likes Farrah Abraham.

In a bizarre, barely intelligible rant, Farrah Abraham blasted MTV’s parent company, Viacom (which owns like 1/3 of entertainment media), saying things like:

“Sad such a phenomenal show will no longer have its biggest talent on the show because of women hating, sex shaming, hate crimes, selfish, Weinstein company power trip behaviors against a professional hard working, honest mother.”

Saying Weinstein company power trip behaviors in the wake of the Weinstein scandal is an unconscionable ploy for attention unless Farrah is actually accusing someone of sexual misconduct.

And we don’t know what “crimes” Farrah is alleging that MTV or Viacom or the Big Scary Teen Mom Illuminati committed.

It would be interesting to listen to her try to explain what, in her mind, a “hate crime” is. Because it sounds like she just thinks that it’s when you’re mean or unfair to someone.

Of course, Farrah later came forward and claimed that MTV didn’t actually fire her … but did commit “hate crimes.”

It looks like, at the very least, MTV gave Farrah an ultimatum about putting stuff inside her body on camera — that she couldn’t do it and be on Teen Mom.

It’s not clear if Farrah misunderstood them or is trying to build up a demand that she not get fired … or what.

Whatever is going on in all of that mess, MTV’s cameras didn’t show up to film Farrah’s mom’s wedding.

But that’s okay, because we know how it all went down.

The Ashley was there, and they interviewed the lucky bride, Debra Danielsen.

“We’ve been on this quest to find each other,” Debra said of Dr. David Merz.

“It’s like, you knew this person was out there, you just had to find them … that’s how I feel.”

A lot of people believe in soul mates. A lot of people don’t.

Also speaking to The Ashley, Farrah spoke about her decision to attend her mother’s wedding.

“I think it means the world for me to be here.”

That is such an astoundingly self-centred way to talk about your decision to attend your mom’s wedding, right?

That is classic Farrah Abraham.

“It really mattered to me and it’s important to me.”

Well, you know what they say about wedding days — what matters is how Farrah Abraham feels.

Debra and David tied the knot at the Scott Aquarium at the Omaha Zoo. The wedding had an “under the sea” motif, and Debra wore a mermaid dress with a long train.

There were bagpipes, which aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, but if Debra and David wanted them … and they weren’t disturbing the aquarium creatures, then sure.

Debra’s friend was the maid of honor, while Farrah was the “honorary maid of honor,” which isn’t a real thing and sounds incredibly goofy.

Farrah was wearing a black pantsuit, and The Ashley reports that she was the only woman in attendance who wore black.

Farrah gave a toast, as we mentioned, and she posted the transcript of it to social media.

“It’s been an up and down year for me. I’m very protective of my mom and I love her so much and I’m happy to see, David, that you love my mom just as much.”

That’s … genuinely sweet.

And, except for that bit about Farrah’s year, it was barely even about her!

Farrah continued her toast, speaking to David:

“You’re strong, and that’s what she needs. Someone by her side who is very strong and loving. I’m happy to have you as part of my family and to be part of your family.”

Even adults gain new family members when their parents get remarried, folks.

“It’s been an amazing opportunity to come together. I love you both.”

Again, when you compare that to Farrah Abraham’s angry and often nonsensical rant about being “fired,” this is a lot more grounded.

Maybe she practiced. We don’t know.

Nobody from Teen Mom was there. Farrah’s daughter, Sophia, wasn’t there.

That’s not surprising. Even less surprising was that Debra’s ex-husband, Michael Abraham, wasn’t there.

if Farrah ends up resolving things with MTV, maybe they’ll regret that they didn’t get to film her mom’s wedding.

If they don’t resolve things, though, maybe producers will be grateful that they got a clean break from Farrah.

We still don’t know everything about what’s going on with Farrah and MTV. But gosh, we’d sure like to.

View Slideshow: Farrah Abraham: Was She Really Fired From Teen Mom OG? An Investigation

ReadMore…

Debra Danielsen: I"ll Have an Awesome Wedding WITHOUT Farrah Abraham!

Farrah Abraham is having quite an eventful week, even by Farrah Abraham standards.

Things got off to a weird start on Tuesday, when Farrah was fired by MTV as a result of her decision to continue working in the sex industry.

Or so she claimed.

While it’s true that Farrah has been masturbating in front of her webcam for cash, there are conflicting reports about why she was let go by the network that made her famous.

In fact, at this point, it’s not even clear if MTV actually fired her at all.

If the situation sounds confusing, it is.

After claiming she’d been canned by MTV parent company Viacom, Farrah retracted her statement and she had “not been let go.”

Of course, this news was conveyed in one of those  nonsensical word salad videos Farrah is so well known for, so it’s incredibly difficult to figure out what she’s trying to say:

Farrah Abraham: MTV Didn’t Fire Me!

The celebrity gossip world has been abuzz with the latest developments in Farrah’s life, and media outlets have reached out to the members of her ever-shrinking inner circle in an effort to figure out what the hell is going on.

Unfortunately, Farrah’s mother, Debra Danielsen, appears to be just as clueless as the rest of us.

Danielsen is getting married this month, and Farrah has made it clear that she will not be attending the ceremony.

She says it’s because she doesn’t approve of the guy her mom is marrying, but we think it’s really because Farrah can’t stand the thought of someone else being the center of attention for an entire afternoon.

So Deb doesn’t have much in the way of new information on whether or not Farrah is now unemployed.

But she has plenty to say about her own upcoming nuptials!

“We’re still going to have a kick-ass wedding and cool celebration,” Danielsen recently told Radar Online.

“We’re going to have henna tattoos. It’s going to be a fun, fantasy wedding instead of anything traditional.”

In typical “mom named Deb” fashion, Danielsen went on to offer way more information about the reception than anyone wanted or needed:

“I’ve had to hire a new caterer and DJ,” she said.

“My rappers left me high and dry. No matter how many times you’ve been married it’s nerve-racking. We’re all nervous.”

Until now, Deb’s actually been relatively tight-lipped (by her standards) about the big day.

“Right now they’re not participating in the wedding,” she told Radar bluntly when asked about Farrah and Sophia’s involvement.

“They’re not coming to the wedding.”

Maybe if she knew there’s gonna be rappers, she’d reconsider.

Watch Teen Mom: OG online to relive Farrah and Deb’s tumultuous relationship.

View Slideshow: Farrah Abraham: Was She Really Fired From Teen Mom OG? An Investigation

ReadMore…

Debra Danielsen: Farrah Abraham"s Not Coming To My Wedding ... But Amber Portwood Is!

Farrah Abraham isn’t great at maintaining healthy relationships with … well, anyone, but her most contentious battle might be the lifelong one she’s been waging against her mother, Debra Danielsen.

Debra is getting married in November, and as a way of making it all about her, Farrah has announced that she won’t be attending.

It’s unclear when Farrah went from frequently screaming in her mother’s face to giving her the silent treatment, but for whatever reason, the two aren’t on speaking terms.

Danielsen recently spoke to Radar Online and revealed that Farrah is sticking to her guns and refusing to attend her mother’s nuptials.

“Right now they’re not participating in the wedding,” Danielsen told Radar.

“They’re not coming to the wedding.”

Danielsen described Farrah’s actions as “very hurtful” and stated that blamed the decision on her the Teen Mom: OG star’s disapproval of her fiance:

“Family is family and blood is blood,” she explained. “I don’t intend on getting married again. If she married someone I didn’t like, I would be there front and center.”

Sounds like Deb is pretty broken up about it.

Which may be why she’s pulling a passive-aggressive boss move and inviting Farrah’s biggest rival to the ceremony.

Last year Farrah and Amber Portwood nearly came to blows at the TM:OG reunion show

“We’re friends,” Danielsen said of her decision to invite Portwood.

“We all started together, we are family. We have a bond and I take that seriously.”

And that’s not the only surprising guest.

Deb has also invited Jenelle Evans’ ex-husband, Courtland Rogers, who was released from prison back in March.

“Courtland has always wanted to meet Farrah,” Danielsen explained.

“There might be a prospect for Farrah there if she comes since Simon [Saran] is out of the picture.”

Yes, Deb thinks Farrah should get together with Jenelle’s ex.

Come to think of, it we think it’s a great idea, too.

But only because we’d give anything to see Jenelle’s reaction to the news.

View Slideshow: Farrah Abraham: A Ridiculous, Sometimes X-Rated Life in GIFs

We’re guessing there would be no survivors.

Watch Teen Mom 2 online to relive Farrah and Deb’s horrendously dysfunctional relationship.

ReadMore…

Farrah Abraham to Debra Danielsen: You"re Not My Mother!

As we’ve been seeing on Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars Family Edition, Farrah Abraham has a very, very dysfunctional relationship with her parents.

Well, we’ve seen it on Marriage Boot Camp, we’ve seen it on Teen Mom OG for years … the point is, things are awful and we know it.

And it’s not all Farrah, either. As terrible as she may be, she learned that behavior from somewhere, you know?

Her mother, Debra Danielsen, is a great big giant piece of work … as big as Farrah, honestly.

And in a new sneak peek from Marriage Boot Camp, we’re seeing just how bad she can be.

In the clip, Debra returns to the mansion after leaving for a few days — as we saw in a previous episode, she left after her creepy boyfriend called and invited her to a “beer competition.”

At the time, Debra’s reasoning was that her boyfriend had told her that he had some big surprise planned for her, which she imagined was a proposal.

She told Farrah that she wasn’t going to “lose her boyfriend” by skipping the trip to stay in therapy with her family, and her response was that she could lose her daughter instead.

And honestly, it makes total sense why Farrah would be upset. But as we’re seeing in this new clip, she’s actually more than upset.

She’s positively livid.

The sneak peek begins with Debra waltzing into the mansion, announcing her return — except no one cares.

Kendra Wilkinson’s mother informs Deb that she “missed a lot” during her time away, but she just says that she’ll “have to get caught up then.”

“You know, we would love to go home and visit our families and stuff,” Kendra’s mom continues.

Debra’s excuse for leaving?

“It was a make or break situation that I needed to go take care of.”

What kind of “make or break situation” goes down at a beer competition? And what kind of boyfriend does Deb have that’s so inconsiderate of her time that he’d force her to go?

Yeah, Marriage Boot Camp is a reality show, but it’s also supposed to be intensive therapy, and for Debra to leave her daughter really speaks volumes about her.

“What was the f-cking life or death situation?” Farrah asks. “Did you get engaged?”

Deb says she didn’t, and that seems to push Farrah over the age.

“Take all your sh-t and go do you,” she tells her mother, before Kendra cuts in to tell her not to waste her energy on her.

But Kendra herself doesn’t have a problem wasting her energy on Deb — she’s the first one to yell, telling Debra “You left, you abandoned your daughter, dude!”

Farrah, taking the hint, starts screaming at her mother, saying “You don’t really want to be here and be with me!”

She actually starts crying, and when her mom tries to make more excuses she tells her “f-ck you” and walks off.

“You weren’t here the last two days,” Farrah’s father, Michael, says. And when Deb tries to shrug it off, he really blows up.

“I am not your f-cking mat no more!” he yells — or, as one of The Situation’s brothers explains it, he “gets a pair of balls.”

Later, Deb goes to apologize to Farrah, but it doesn’t go as planned.

Farrah, it turns out, is also sorry — “sorry for someone who says they want a family and then they f-ck up their family.”

Deb asks her why she’s swearing, and it’s apparently because Deb is a “psycho, stupid, twisted, manipulative motherf-cker. And you’re not a family member.”

Her anger carried over to a confessional in which she told Debra “You’re not my f-cking mom. You’re a f-cking stranger off the f-cking street as far as I’m concerned, and good luck.”

She also told her that “You’re a stupid, dumb bitch. If you don’t want to be degraded, if you want me to f-cking respect somebody, then give me something to respect.”

While Farrah is, of course, terrible, she has a point.

And what does it say about Debra that, at least at this point in time, she looks worse than Farrah Abraham?

View Slideshow: Farrah Abraham: A Ridiculous, Sometimes X-Rated Life in GIFs

ReadMore…

Debra Danielsen Claps Back at Farrah Abraham: I Do NOT Have Asperger"s!

Earlier this week, we reported that Farrah Abraham decided to diagnose her mother, Debra Danielsen, with Asperger’s Syndrome, a mild personality disorder found on the autism spectrum.

Astonishingly, Farrah’s armchair psychoanalysis was aided and abetted by Dr. Drew, America’s favorite unscrupulous quack disguised as a serious medical professional.

(Sorry, Dr. Phil!)

“Generally, healthcare professionals, in particular, neurologists and psychiatrists are best suited to establish if an individual has Asperger’s syndrome and schizoaffective disorder,” Debra said in a statement issued to The Ashley’s Reality Roundup.

“I have been totally mentally, physically and emotionally healthy,” Debra continued.

“Both Dr. Ish Major and Dr. Venus Nicollini confirmed that on WEtv’s Marriage Boot Camp: Family Edition.”

We’re beginning to wonder if anyone in Farrah’s family has ever had a non-televised doctor’s appointment, but that’s a conversation for another time.

It’s easy to blame Farrah for this ridiculous situation, but we’re gonna go ahead and heap the majority of the responsibility at Dr. Drew’s feet.

Diagnosing a patient that you haven’t personally treated is considered the height of professional irresponsibility in the medical community.

Doing so publicly in order to buddy up to your non-patient’s dysfunctional daughter is borderline depraved.

Farrah can sit in judgment and tell the world that her mother suffers from testicular torsion and a chronic case of five-head if she wants to.

No one will take it seriously, because she’s not a doctor.

(Also, she’s Farrah Abraham, so no one takes anything that she says seriously.)

Drew, however, is supposed to be a bit more responsible, and should no better than to applaud Farrah’s baseless insights on his podcast.

Fortunately, Deb’s not taking this one lying down.

In addition to going off on Farrah, she also let loose on her daughter’s coattail-riding on-off boyfriend Simon Saran in a recent interview:

“Farrah deserves to have the best man available on this planet who cherishes her and my [granddaughter, Farrah’s daughter] Sophia,” Debra told In Touch, before referring to Simon as a “gold-digger.”

Simon, of course, responded in the douchey over-the-top fashion we’ve come to expect, tweeting:

“I’m a gold digger? Interesting, @ddanielsen when’s the last time you ever pulled out cash or a credit card around me? You dumb miserable hooker!”

Last we checked, Farrah and Debra were not on speaking terms, and with exchanges like this, it’s not hard to see why.

Fortunately, there’s a sliver of good news for Debra in all of this:

The rumors about Farrah and Simon getting engaged are not true, and Farrah says they’re not even dating anymore.

Sometimes, you just have to be grateful for small miracles.

View Slideshow: Farrah Abraham: A Ridiculous, Sometimes X-Rated Life in GIFs

ReadMore…

Farrah Abraham: Debra Danielsen Has Asperger"s Syndrome!

If you watch Teen Mom online, than you’re probably aware that Farrah Abraham is not known for expressing herself in the most articulate fashion.

In fact, the Teen Mom everyone loves to hate is clearly a graduate of the Sarah Palin School of Rhetoric:

She uses words without understanding their meanings, mutters expressions that make sense only to her, and changes topics rapidly in an effort to move on before anyone can point that what she just said makes no sense.

Amazingly, however, Farrah is capable of occasional flashes of intellect.

By which we mean she sometimes uses words in an order that wouldn’t cause the average English teacher’s head to explode.

Farrah recently appeared on Dr. Drew’s podcast, and the medical-professional-turned-MTV-quack was effusive in his praise of Ms. Abraham’s eloquence and astuteness.

He even went so far as to concur with Farrah’s insights about her mother’s mental state.

Granted, Dr. Drew is about as much of a respected medical professional these days as doctors Dre, Pepper, and Who, but it’s still surprising to hear him publicly agree with a reality star’s diagnosis of a different reality star.

(We won’t even bother delving into the question of whether or not it’s ethical for Drew to do so.)

Drew began his prying into the psychological state of Debra Danielsen (who wasn’t there to defend herself, BTW) by buttering Farrah up with a few well-chosen compliments.

“Farrah you say some of the most profound stuff sometimes and I’m sorry that a lot of it doesn’t get on TV,” a fawning Drew told Farrah before basically announcing to the world he’s given up on being taken seriously by the medical community.

“I was just looking at your mom and have gotten to know her over the years too and I’m just worried there’s something psychiatrically going on there that’s not being properly managed. Am I on to something?” Drew asked.

(Yes, a doctor just asked Farrah Abraham if he’s “onto something” with his assessment of a third party.)

“I guess she dates a doctor so there that goes,” Farrah initially demurred.

I’m thinking there’s something really there that you’ve been pounding against your whole life and your mom isn’t aware it’s there and it’s of a psychiatric nature,” Drew persisted, before asking again:

“Am I on to something here?”

“That is what it is. That’s what I know now and I’m done with conversations and I’m done with fighting the uphill battle,” Farrah said, adding:

“I’ve researched so much about my mother that I think she has Asperger’s and has some other things.”

Asperger’s is a milder disorder on the autism spectrum. It can be difficult to diagnose, but that didn’t stop Drew from doing exactly that on a freakin’ podcast.

Believe it or not, Drew continued to goad Farrah from there, pushing her to play another game of armchair psychiatrist:

“What do you think besides Apserger’s? Because I agree with you,” he told Farrah.

Farrah says she “forgot the other stuff,” leading Drew to prompt her:

“I’m not her doctor but I’ve been concerned there’s something on the schizoaffective spectrum.”

View Slideshow: Farrah Abraham: A Ridiculous, Sometimes X-Rated Life in GIFs

Farrah and Drew go on to conclude that Debra is in need of serious psychiatric help, but neither goes so far as to point out that if that’s true, she probably shouldn’t be on a reality show.

Look, we’re not saying Deb deserves to win mother of the year, but as far as we know, she’s never, say, talked about her 8-year-old daughter’s future sex tape.

We don’t want to imply that Farrah is mentally ill, but we will say that her pathologizing someone else’s bizarre behavior is a serious pot-kettle situation.

ReadMore…