Friday, March 11, 2016

Khloe Kardashian to Ciara: Have Sex With Russell Wilson Already!

As you may have heard, Ciara is dating Russell Wilson.


Actually, maybe “dating” isn’t the right word. Maybe we should say “going with” like middle-schoolers, or “courting,” a la the Duggars, because Russell and Ciara’s relationship is a completely sexless affair.



Yes, it’s hard to believe, but Russell had more contact with his center’s butt last season than with any part of Ciara.


It’s a bit strange that they’re saving themselves for marriage, as Russell is divorced and Ciara has a kid with Future, so it’s not like either of them is pretending to be a virgin.


Even so, Wilson says God told him not to have sex with Ciara, and he’s just doing as he’s told. 


But as Khloe Kardashian pointed out this week, Wilson might be mistaking his own idiocy for a heavenly command:


“They should be having sex,” Khloe said on the most recent episode of Kocktails With Khloe.


“With all due respect to Ciara, she has a baby. It’s not like we don’t know if she is a virgin or not … None of us would know about it if they weren’t publicly telling us that they are practicing celibacy, so who are you trying to prove this to? Is it a look?”


Not surprisingly, Wilson and Ciara were not thrilled with Khloe telling them what to do with their sex lives, which led to Khloe issuing the following semi-apology on Twitter:


“I love and adore Ciara! I respect her on many levels. Was freely discussing my views on celibacy & people twist & turn everything to create a feud.”


Uh, yeah, that’s some pretty shoddy backpedaling, Khloe. 


We might buy that explanation if Khloe hadn’t brought up the topic on her show, then immediately called out Ciara by name.


We can’t believe we’re saying this, but Khloe should take a lesson from her brother-in-law, Kanye West, and learn to stick by her trash talk.