Trey Pearson is a Christian. And he’s a rock star. And he’s gay.
Growing up in a religious family, he tried to deny his sexuality his entire life, but Pearson has finally come to terms with who he is.
The front man for rock band Everyday Sunday has just come out, and is opening up about his journey in a heartfelt letter.
“I finally decided to come out because I couldn’t keep trying to be something that I wasn’t,” he told Religion News Service.
He shared that he grew up believing that being gay was a choice, so he followed a straight lifestyle thinking it was the right thing to do.
“I never wanted to be gay,” he told (614) Magazine. “I was scared of what God would think and what all of these people I loved would think about me; so it was never an option for me.”
He wound up marrying a woman and having two children with her, but recently realized he “was never going to be who my wife needed me to be.”
He recently wrote a letter to fans, explaining his decision to come out:
“These last several months have been the hardest – but have also ended up being the most freeing months — of my life.
“To make an extremely long story short, I have come to be able to admit to myself, and to my family, that I am gay.
“I grew up in a very conservative Christian home where I was taught that my sexual orientation was a matter of choice, and had put all my faith into that. I had never before admitted to myself that I was gay, let alone to anyone else. I never wanted to be gay.
I was scared of what God would think and what all of these people I loved would think about me; so it never was an option for me. I have been suppressing these attractions and feelings since adolescence. I’ve tried my whole life to be straight. I married a girl, and I even have two beautiful little kids. My daughter, Liv, is six and my son, Beckham, is two.
“I had always romanticized the idea of falling in love with a woman; and having a family had always been my dream. In many ways, that dream has come true. But I have also come to realize a lot of time has passed in my life pushing away, blocking out and not dealing with real feelings going on inside of me.
I have tried not to be gay for more than 20 years of my life. I found so much comfort as a teen in 1 Samuel 18-20 and the intimacy of Jonathan and David. I thought and hoped that such male intimacy could fulfill that void I felt in my desire for male companionship. I always thought if I could find these intimate friendships, then that would be enough.”
He goes on to explain that he thought once he was married, everything would fall into place. He committed himself to his wife and family, but he eventually realized he was living a lie, and it wasn’t fair to his loved ones.
“I am never going to be able to change how I am, and no matter how healthy our relationship becomes, it’s never going to change what I know deep down: that I am gay.”
He is grateful for his wife for being supportive throughout the process, and hopes that fans will still love and accept him.
“I hope people will hear my heart, and that I will still be loved. I’m still the same guy, with the same heart, who wants to love God and love people with everything I have.”
