Taylor Swift & Calvin Harris: Totally Getting Married!!! (Someday)

Earlier this week, we reported that Calvin Harris had been hanging out with Taylor Swift’s mom, which lead to speculation that the Scottish DJ was asking Mrs. Swift for her daughter’s hand in marriage.

Now, sources have confirmed that Taylor and Calvin are getting married! Maybe. Someday. If they feel like it. Take it away, source:

“No breakup is going to happen,” the insider tells Hollywood Life. “No engagement is imminent, but they have told each other that it ends with them and they will get married.”

Yes, Taylor and Calvin are not engaged, but like many a middle school couple pawing at each other under the bleachers before them, they’ve assured one another that they’re on a one-way trip to Marriage & Babies Town.

But that’s later. For right now, Taylor has finished up her tour, and she and Calvin are looking forward to some sexy time:

“They want to make up for lost time,” says the source. “The two want to spend a week in bed together because they’ve really missed being a couple, and really missed their intimacy with one another.”

Once they’re finished making blonde, blue-eyed, platinum-selling babies, Taylor and Calvin are apparently planning on hanging out with Selena Gomez and Niall Horan who (according to this same anonymous insider) are totally a couple!

“Taylor would love to go on a double date with Selena and Niall,” says the source. “It’s just a matter of time. She’s really excited and happy for them.”

We’re beginning to think the source has just been reading Taylor’s dream journal, but whatevs. We like this version of reality. 

View Slideshow: 13 Famous Dudes Who Have Dated Taylor Swift

Calvin Harris: Hanging With Taylor Swift"s Mom, Asking Permission to Propose?!

There was a time when you couldn’t turn around without seeing photos Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris all loved-up together.

Back in October, however, the relationship seemed to cool. 

Calvin was accused of cheating on Taylor (at “happy ending” massage parlors, no less); Taylor went back to spending most of her time with her ever-expanding “squad;” and the couple wasn’t photographer together for over two months.

It was widely assumed that Calvin and Taylor had broken up, and we would soon be treated to an album’s worth of breakup songs in which Taylor likened herself to a discarded and forgotten plaything – a Hobbes to Harris’ Calvin, if you will.

Now, however, in what can only be described as a Swiftmas miracle, Calvin and Taylor have reconciled, and it looks as though they might be ready to take the next step in their relationship.

Several sources have reported that Calvin was in attendance at Taylor’s 26th birthday party last week. 

Even more interesting is the fact that Calvin was spotted in what appeared to be a private conversation with Taylor’s parents.

Naturally, this has led to speculation that he was asking their permission to propose to Taylor, and unlike the many previous rumors about Taylor getting engaged, this one isn’t all that ridiculous.

She’s 26; he’s soon to be 32; they’ve been dating for a decent length of time…

Taylor may pretend she doesn’t care if she ever gets married, but have you listened to her lyrics? that girl was born to squeal at the sight of an impossibly huge princess-cut diamond.

Get ready for the wedding of 10,000 bridesmaids!

View Slideshow: Taylor Swift Instagram Photos: This Singer Has Style!

Taylor Swift & Calvin Harris: "Going Strong" in Wake of Cheating Rumors, Source Says

If you were anywhere near social media yesterday, you no doubt heard the rumor Taylor Swift had dumped Calvin Harris because of his fondness for massage parlors.

That may sound like a strange reason to end a relationship, but you see, these weren’t just any old massage parlors.

No, sources were claiming that Calvin had been receiving “happy endings” from a Hollywood establishment that specializes in the old rub-and-tug.

Naturally, no one wants to hear that their boyfriend is paying for handies while they’re out of town, but Harris has vehemently denied that there’s any truth to the rumors, and at least one source says Taylor believes him.

“They are happy and going strong,” an insider tells People magazine, adding that the rumors are, “absolutely untrue.”

Last night, Harris took to Twitter to deny the rumors and threaten to sue anyone reporting the “happy ending” story as fact:

“It’s not going to be a ‘happy ending’ for everyone I sue for defamation of character for all these bulls–t stories bye bye,” wrote the irate Scottish DJ.

Taylor favorited the tweet, which we suppose is an indication that she’s still in Harris’ corner.

Still, it’s odd that she hasn’t spoken publicly about the rumors.

Knowing Taylor, it’s possible that she’s planning to write a song about the Hand Job Scandal of ’15 – or maybe that’s what “Shake It Off” was really about all this time.

View Slideshow: Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris: So in Love!

Calvin Harris Threatens to Sue Over Hand Job Allegations

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Taylor Swift-Calvin Harris Breakup: Was the Singer"s Squad to Blame?

Earlier today, we reported that Taylor Swift has dumped Calvin Harris, and the ex-couple is currently doing their best to keep the story out of the press.

That’s not surprising, as the rumors circulating online today, are pretty embarrassing for both parties.

First we heard that Caylor called it quits because of Harris’ fondness for “happy ending” massage parlors. 

Now, sources are claiming that Taylor’s famous “squad” might be to blame for the breakup.

It seems Taylor’s girlfriends are such a major part of her life that Calvin eventually got frustrated by the lack of alone time.

“It seems to bug him that her friends always appear to be around whenever they hang out,” an insider tells the UK’s Metro magazine.

The source claims that between the media and the squad, life with Taylor was simply too much for Harris to handle.

“Calvin has found the circus surrounding their relationship overwhelming,’ the insider claims. ‘It was incredibly intense so they’ve taken a step back and are cooling things off.”

Apparently, part of the problem was that both the press and Taylor’s chick clique were frequently buzzing about rumors that Harris and Swift were engaged.

“Talk of them marrying freaked them both out, neither is ready and suddenly having all this speculation took its toll,” says the source.

It probably didn’t help that Calvin’s preferred method of coping with the stress of a public relationship involved frequenting Thai massage parlors. Just sayin’.

View Slideshow: Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris: So in Love!

Taylor Swift DUMPS Calvin Harris Over His Love of "Happy Ending" Massages?!

Last month, Calvin Harris was spotted leaving a Thai massage parlor known for providing its clients with “happy endings.”

Taylor Swift was busy welcoming various celebrities on stage as part of her seemingly never-ending 1989 Tour, and it seemed that she wasn’t bothered by her boyfriend’s fondness for rub-and-tug establishments.

Now, however, Radar Online is reporting that Taylor quietly dumped Calvin over the weekend after realizing that there was more than just massages going on inside that parlor.

No stranger to cheaters, Taylor reportedly had her suspicions from the start, but Calvin was able to convince her that his $ 40-a-pop (tee-hee) sessions were no more unseemly than a visit to the chiropractors.

“When the photos got posted on Radar, said to him, ‘What the f–k?” says one insider. “He lied to her. He gave some bullish-t excuse that his masseuse was sick and he needed his shoulder worked on.”

As more facts came to light, Taylor reportedly realized that Calvin was just the latest in her string of philanderering boyfriends, and she firmly gave him the boot.

Sources say Harris has been desperately trying to fix the situation, but Taylor has remained firm in her insistence that it’s over.

“He wanted to fly in to see her [on tour] and repair things, but her assistant called gave her a firm ‘no,"” says one insider. “Instead he went to Vegas with his bros.”

That’s one way to get over being dumped.

Of course, we all know how Taylor handles breakups. Get ready to hear a multi-platinum song about what a piece of sh-t you are, Calvin!

View Slideshow: Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris: So in Love!

Taylor Swift DUMPS Calvin Harris Over His Love of "Happy Ending" Massages?!

Last month, Calvin Harris was spotted leaving a Thai massage parlor known for providing its clients with “happy endings.”

Taylor Swift was busy welcoming various celebrities on stage as part of her seemingly never-ending 1989 Tour, and it seemed that she wasn’t bothered by her boyfriend’s fondness for rub-and-tug establishments.

Now, however, Radar Online is reporting that Taylor quietly dumped Calvin over the weekend after realizing that there was more than just massages going on inside that parlor.

No stranger to cheaters, Taylor reportedly had her suspicions from the start, but Calvin was able to convince her that his $ 40-a-pop (tee-hee) sessions were no more unseemly than a visit to the chiropractors.

“When the photos got posted on Radar, said to him, ‘What the f–k?” says one insider. “He lied to her. He gave some bullish-t excuse that his masseuse was sick and he needed his shoulder worked on.”

As more facts came to light, Taylor reportedly realized that Calvin was just the latest in her string of philanderering boyfriends, and she firmly gave him the boot.

Sources say Harris has been desperately trying to fix the situation, but Taylor has remained firm in her insistence that it’s over.

“He wanted to fly in to see her [on tour] and repair things, but her assistant called gave her a firm ‘no,"” says one insider. “Instead he went to Vegas with his bros.”

That’s one way to get over being dumped.

Of course, we all know how Taylor handles breakups. Get ready to hear a multi-platinum song about what a piece of sh-t you are, Calvin!

View Slideshow: Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris: So in Love!

Holly Madison Defends Baby Name, Zings Crystal Harris

Holly Madison is at it again, but she’s not taking Hugh Hefner to task this time. Rather, she’s defending her baby’s name … and taking a dig at Hef’s wife.

As a new mom, the 35-year-old Madison said she faced severe criticism, not because of her Playboy past, but for naming her daughter Rainbow.

“Oh, yeah. I got flooded with stupid commentary on social media,” she said. “It’s definitely a unique name. I like unique names.”

“I wouldn’t have picked it if were common. But, growing up, there was a girl in my class named Rainbow. I grew up in Oregon.”

“A lot of hippies went [there] to start families. There was a girl at school named Rainbow. I was so jealous and I wanted it to be my name.”

“So it’s definitely unusual, but it’s a name. It’s not like I called her Coffee Table. People love to say, ‘That’s a stripper name."”

“But I’ve spent a lot of time in Vegas and strippers aren’t named Rainbow. They’re named Amber, Crystal and Jessica.”

Hugh Hefner, Madison’s infamous Playboy founder ex, went on to marry Crystal Harris after Holly broke things off with him.

Intentional, subtle shade on Holly’s part?

Maybe, maybe not. But she’s not wrong about the name. No offense to Crystals across the nation and world. We still love you.

Madison, who has taken Hef to task for trying to buy her for $ 3 million and subjecting her to sick orgies, says he is not in her life now.

“Absolutely not,” Holly said. “When I left the mansion we were cordial for a while but eventually I opened my eyes to what kind of person he was.”

“We haven’t talked for years.”

Madison said she penned Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and Cautionary Tales of a Former Playboy Bunny for her daughter.

“I wanted my side of the story out there. I never had a voice. It was always shaped by the TV show or by Playboy or Hef himself,” she says.

“But I want my daughter to know why I made the decisions I did. Since writing the book, I’ve had a lot of practice defending myself.”

Talking about “the choices I made,” Madison says, has been cathartic and “good practice for discussing those decisions with her.”

As for Rainbow following in her footsteps?

“I would not be OK with it,” she insisted.

“When she is an adult, she will be able to do what she wants, but from Day One I’ve tried to raise her to know she has value.”

“She has value. Her body parts have value, and she doesn’t have to do something cheap or tawdry to get attention.”

“If she wanted to – God forbid – I would tell her my whole experience with it and I’d be honest that it wasn’t what I thought it would be.”

Taylor Swift: In Love With Calvin Harris, Calls DJ By His Birth Name

Well, it’s official: Taylor Swift is in love.

We know – Taylor is pretty much always in love, and she lives to scribble her future married name all over the pages of her Lisa Frank notebook, but this time it’s, like, totally for real, you guys.

A source tells Us Weekly that while Taylor has dated a lot of famous dudes, she feels more strongly about Calvin Harris than about any of her previous boyfriends. 

In fact, things are moving so quickly (dare we say – swiftly?) between the lanky lovers that Taylor calls Calvin by a name usually reserved for his family and childhood friends.

“Taylor always calls Calvin by his birth name, Adam, and never Calvin in private,” an insider tells Us. “Taylor gets all dressed and glammed up whenever she is going to see him to look her best.”

Well, so much for those rumors that Taylor and Calvin are faking their relationship. Or should we say – Taylor and Adam Richard Wiles?

In other news, we’d like to nominate Calvin for the Lamest Stage name of All-Time Award. C’mon, dude, your nom de DJ should be something cool – preferably something with “Ice” in it.

Anyway, the source continues to gush about the relationship between Taylor and Adam/Calvin, possibly in response to rumors that they’re having problems as a result of Harris being caught receiving a “happy ending” massage in LA last week.

“She’s head over heels,” the source continues. “She hasn’t been in love like this before!”

There you have it. When you feel that passionately about someone, it doesn’t matter what their name is…or what kind of massages they enjoy.

View Slideshow: Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris: So in Love!

Calvin Harris: Taylor Swift"s Boyfriend Accused of Receiving "Happy Ending" at Thai Massage Parlor

Taylor Swift may have sang about a “Love Story,” but we don’t think this is the sort of happy ending she had in mind.

Radar Online has photos of Calvin Harris leaving a Thai massage parlor in LA with a rather satisfied look on his face.

Taylor, of course, is currently thousands of miles away, touring the Midwest on her 1989 tour.

It’s worth noting that the rub-and-tug Harris sleepily moseyed out of today is the first result that comes up in a Google search for “best Thai massage happy ending.”

However, in Calvin’s defense, many of the business’ Yelp reviews come from pissed-off men who did not, uh…find the release that they were looking for.

If it turns out Calvin was receiving a full frontal massage, it’ll be the latest in a long line of strikes against a dude who once seemed to be Taylor’s perfect match.

Last month, Calvin went off on Zayn Malik in what he probably thought was a chivalrous defense of Taylor’s virtue, but came off more as bizarre temper tantrum.

Shortly thereafter, Calvin attacked Avril Lavigne on social media, again because of some perceived slight against Swift.

His publicist denies the feud, it’s interesting that Swift brought Lavigne on stage just a few days later to show the world that there’s no bad blood. 

Calvin Harris: Appropriately tall and blonde Prince Charming, or pervy unenthusiastic hand-job aficionado? You be the judge.

View Slideshow: Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris: So in Love!