Jax Taylor: Leaving Vanderpump Rules?!

Brace yourselves, because Jax Taylor could be getting his own spin-off.

Vanderpump Rules‘ most intolerable dead-ass and his adorably naive girlfriend, Brittany Cartwright teased what may be plans for their own reality show.

Last week, Cartwright and Taylor shared an Instagram from Bravo’s offices on the Universal Studios lot.

The couple had attended Bravo’s bake-off, in which Bravo employees presented their best baked goods to judge Kathy Wakile from The Real Housewives of New Jersey.

Taylor hashtagged the photo #jaxandbrittany, and Radar Online reports that he and Cartwright are shooting in her native Kentucky.

It’s not confirmed whether or not the show has been picked up or will even air.

Last season, Taylor introduced the cast and viewers to Cartwright, 27, after meeting her in Las Vegas.

Cartwright packed up her life and moved out to Los Angeles to be with Taylor, and tried her best to get hired as a waitress at Sur.

Unfortunately, each time Cartwright came in for an interview, she forgot a resume.  She also failed to cover up enough, to the point where even Vanderpump was horrified.

No matter!  Jax moved her into his apartment straight away, and bought her a pair of fake boobs.

The new season of Rules teases trouble in paradise, though.

“I don’t think things are going well for us anymore,” Taylor tells Cartwright in a preview.

Truth be told, Taylor could be speaking about his relationship with someone else because EDITING, but prior to that, he called out Cartwright for “sitting on the couch for a year while” he takes care of her.

Whatever the case, Taylor and Cartwright have been keeping a lid on the status of the relationship, possibly to stir up interest.

Last month, Taylor appealed to the female viewers by partaking in a discussion with co-star Ariana Madix about tampons and birth control.

“You know what’s f***ed up? You know there is a tax on f***ing tampons?” Madix told her simple friend.

“There’s a tax? But your body automatically… you don’t have a choice!” a drunk Taylor replied.

“That’s f***ed up… they should be free! Just like birth control… but birth control you can get for free and tampons you have to pay for. That’s a little weird.”

Yes, ladies.  Jax Taylor is growing up before our very eyes.

“I’m a total feminist! I’m starting to believe in women’s rights.”

Season five of Vanderpump Rules premieres Monday, November 7th at 9pm on Bravo.

ReadMore…

Lala Kent QUITS Vanderpump Rules!

Lala, we hardly knew ye.

After just one season on Vanderpump Rules the model who proved to have to have a preternatural talent for stirring up a drama (which made her a perfect fit at SUR), Lala Kent has announced that she will not be returning for the show’s fifth season.

View Slideshow: Lala Kent: Best Instagram Pics of Vanderpump Rules’ Newest Star

The 25-year-old model and long-winded speech interruptor made the surprise announcement as only she could, addressing a hater on Twitter in the sassy style she became known for during her brief stint as a reality star.

It started when a fan of the beloved Bravo series tweeted a helpful reminder that Lala is not well-liked by her fellow castmates:

“@lala_kent crazy how @stassi is on vacation with everyone & ur not.. Just goes to show ur still hated as the show goes on.”

Lala responded with as much sass as one can fit into 140 characters:

“@kendallfoxxxay @stassi I have decided to part ways from the show. Thanks bitch.”

She later confirmed that she won’t be returning to the show with a follow-up tweet and a hint that she may have a new project in the works:

“I made the decision to leave the show. I realized it isn’t for me. IT WAS COMPLETELY MY DECISION,” Lala tweeted.

She later added: “#ibelongonVH1”

She followed the cryptic hashtag with an Instagram post addressed to her fans:

“I love you all and thank you all. I’m overwhelmed by the amount of love I gained from such sweet people in such a short period of time.

“The fan base I have has kept me on cloud 9. Stay tuned for Lala’s next move. #upup&away”

It’s unclear what prompted Kent’s departure, but given the amount of drama she experienced during her brief time as a SUR girl, any number of factors could have been to blame:

Lala and James Kennedy were nearly fired by the network after they cursed up a storm on Andy Cohen’s Watch What Happens Live last year.

Shortly thereafter, Lala’s relationship with Jacksonville Jaguars linebacker Hayes Pullard was revealed, despite her efforts to keep it a secret.

We don’t know what her next move will be, but based on the sales for the single she released with James Kennedy, we’re guessing she won’t be giving it a go in the music biz.

We’ll keep you posted, and in the meantime, you can watch Vanderpump Rules online to relive all of Lala’s best moments.

Sigh. Who will tell Kristen to shut up now?

Oh, right – everyone.

View Slideshow: 37 Classic Vanderpump Rules Moments in GIFs

Lisa Vanderpump: Returning to The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Under THESE Conditions

PHEW. 

That was a close one.

Earlier in the week, we were forced to wonder what a season of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills would be like without Lisa Vanderpump.

Would she really leave the show that made her famous?

It felt like a strong possibility after Vanderpump met with network executives to discuss her future and how much money it would take to retain her entertaining services for Season 7.

According to the initial report, Vanderpump also had issues with the program’s “negative vibes,” along with the ways in which certain co-stars “ganged up on her.”

In other words: she apparently had issues with everything that makes The Real Housewives franchise into an ongoing hit.

So… is she really out?

View Slideshow: 9 Times Lisa Vanderpump Proved She Was The REAL Sex Monster

Not based on the latest information TMZ has gathered.

Production sources tell that celebrity gossip website that Vanderpump does have a list of demands.

You will not be able to watch The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills online with her as a series regular unless they are met.

However, the demands are not centered around her paycheck.

FIRST, Lisa wants the show to give a platform her work in the LGBT community.

SECOND, she would like a spotlight on all the work she does to combat  AIDS.

THIRD, Vanderpump is seeking publicity for her fight to put a stop to the dog meat market in China.

The insider goes on to say that Bravo higher-ups have agreed to all of these demands and, as a result, Vanderpump will be back in the fold when the series returns.

Lisa didn’t even bring up the issue of other Housewives acting all jealous or mean because she understands this comes with the reality TV territory.

We don’t even know what to say here.

This all sounds way too rational and reasonable and not crazy.

How is Lisa Vanderpump a Real Housewives of Beverly Hills cast member?!?

View Slideshow: Real Housewives All Stars: Who Should Be Cast?

Lisa Vanderpump: Leaving The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills?

What is a cast without LVP?

A jam-packed schedule and her disdain for the venom spewed last season on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills has left Lisa Vanderpump wondering if it’s worth it to continue filming the franchise.

Production sources tell TMZ that Vanderpump met with Bravo executives at one of her West Hollywood restaurants, PUMP last week to discuss her future, and whether or not it includes the Housewives.

The issue, according to sources, isn’t money.

On top of running three restaurants and serving as an executive producer of Vanderpump Rules, LVP isn’t in love with the show’s “negative vibes,” nor is she pleased with the way certain cast members “ganged up on her.”

Vanderpump, an animal rights activist, is also working to put an end to the dog meat market in China, which also takes up a significant amount of her time.

So far, Vanderpump is the only Housewife not to have signed on for season 7.

View Slideshow: The 9 Richest Real Housewives in Bravo History

Vanderpump and co-star Lisa Rinna famously went from close friends to sworn enemies last season, when Rinna accused her of manipulation.

Back in May, Rinna told Andy Cohen that she and Vanderpump had not been in touch since taping the reunion special.

“My current relationship with Vanderpump, I haven’t spoken with her, actually, so I don’t know what it would be, to be honest,” Rinna said on Watch What Happens Live.

“I saw her at the reunion. That was the last time.”

As for Vanderpump, her last blog post for season six left her drained, but able to see things in a different light.

“Clarity has descended, maybe I should’ve retaliated aggressively at the reunion, but I refuse to wallow in the murky quagmire in which they swim,” she wrote.

“It was an arduous few weeks that I emerged from bruised, but emotionally intact as I focus on all the positivities that life has to offer…”

There has been no word from the network on the status of Vanderpump’s contract.  

The reality star herself has not made a statement either.

Do you think it’s a wise move for Vanderpump to leave The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills?

View Slideshow: 9 Times Lisa Vanderpump Proved She Was The REAL Sex Monster

James Kennedy: Vanderpump Rules Star "Too Drunk" To Fly Back From Las Vegas Bash

Go home, James.  You’re drunk.

If not you’re not familiar with British drunk slob kebob James Kennedy from Vanderpump Rules, he is the skinny, tank top-wearing fruit fly who goes around insulting female cast members and irritating Jax Taylor to the point where he wants to punch him in the face.

In fact, James makes Jax look almost likeable.

James is a DJ, and was hired to spin/co-host the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino’s Rehab Pool Party over Memorial Day weekend with Rules co-star, Lala Kent.

According to Entertainment Tonight, James was too sauced to board his Southwest Airlines flight back to Los Angeles on May 30th.

“He and LaLa were screaming at each other in the terminal,” a source told ET.

“It looked like a classic drunken fight between friends…I’m pretty sure it was LaLa telling James to get it together before getting on the plane.”

Lala reportedly yelled, “I hate you” to James and then boarded the plane.

View Slideshow: Lala Kent: Best Instagram Pics of Vanderpump Rules’ Newest Star

“Right before they closed the doors, the airline worker said James couldn’t get on because he was too drunk,” the source added.

“LaLa got on the plane and Raquel stayed back at the airport with James.”

Another source told E! that Kennedy was able to travel on a later flight.

A spokesperson from Southwest Airlines told the entertainment site the have no records of Lala and James fighting.

Then again, this is Las Vegas.  Southwest probably sees this kind of thing happen all the time.  Their policy probably allows for drunken antics to take place so long as no one is killed, vomits on gate agents or holds fast food employees hostage.

James has a history of surly drunkeness on Vanderpump Rules.  On one episode, he got into a fight with an employee from Sur’s sister restaurant, Pump, which got him fired as a DJ and demoted back to his position as a bus boy.

He cried.  It was awkward.

Neither James nor Lala have commented about the incident, most likely because they’re both still hungover.

View Slideshow: Celebrities Who Were Placed Under Arrest in 2016

Lisa Vanderpump: Yolanda Foster is LYING About Her Kids Having Lyme Disease!

It’s been almost four years since Yolanda Foster was diagnosed with Lyme disease, and while she’s made significant strides with her treatment, her Real Housewives of Beverly Hills castmates are no closer to believing the former model was ever to sick to begin with.

Back in October, Yolanda revealed that two of her kids also have Lyme disease and now Lisa Vanderpump is calling BS on that claim as well.

So if you were sick of the “Is Yolanda a big old faker?” storyline on the last season of RHOBH, you may want to skip season seven, which is currently filming.

According to TMZ, Vanderpump recently asked Yolanda’s first husband, Mohamed Hadid, about his kids’ health in front of a group of mutual friends (and a Bravo camera crew, of course) and it did not go over well.

In fact, the site is reporting that Mohamed has ended his 20-year friendship with Lisa as a result of her persistent suspicions about his kids’ health.

Things have gotten so bad that Mohamed refuses to set foot in any of Lisa’s three restaurants, which means he has to turn on his TV to see SUR bartender/human petri dish Jax Taylor. Sad.

As for whether or not 19-year-old Bella Hadid and 16-year-old Anwat Hadid are actually sick, well…we have no idea.

But with this sort of thing, it’s best to err on the side of caution and not accuse people of faking it for attention.

Watch The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills online for more of the ongoing Lyme disease drama.

Lisa Rinna Blasts Lisa Vanderpump For Trash-Talking Yolanda Foster

If you’re only familiar with Lisa Vanderpump as the sage boss/life coach on Vanderpump Rules, you may not realize that on the show that made her famous, Vanderpump is just another drama-addicted frenemy on one of TV’s most dysfunctional casts.

The bulk of this season’s drama has centered around the controversy over Yolanda Foster’s Lyme disease diagnosis. 

Specifically, the question of whether or not Foster is only pretending to be sick has been a hot topic in recent months.

It may seem like a bizarre accusation, but there’s ample evidence to suggest that Yolanda might not really be ill.

Foster’s own ex-husband has hinted that she’s faking it, and the former model has stated that two of her children are also infected, which would make for a bizarre coincidence, as the disease is tick-borne and not contagious.

Anyway, just about all of the ladies have stated that they believe Foster is faking it at one point or another, and now the controversy is tearing the group apart.

The drama is currently being re-hashed in one of those multi-episode reunion sagas that have become a trademark for Bravo.

This week’s installment features a battle of the Lisas, as Rinna (formerly a Foster-Lyme disease truther) blasts Vanderpump for comments she allegedly made behind Foster’s back:

View Slideshow: 9 Times Lisa Vanderpump Proved She Was The REAL Sex Monster

“We’re at my birthday and you came…I was thrilled to see you,” Rinna tells Foster at the reunion.

“You came with no makeup. You left. [Vanderpump’s husband] Ken had said you looked terrible and [my husband] Harry said, ‘You know what? That’s not OK. This woman is sick and we need to stand by her.’”

Vanderpump weakly defends herself, saying, “Ken didn’t say she looked terrible to her face…he was observing that she didn’t look good,.”

Rinna then cuts her off and accuses her of attempting to use Foster’s illness as grist for the drama mill:

“Harry said, ‘We need to support this woman whether she’s sick or not.’…And you go, ‘There goes our ‘f–king’ story line.’”

Rinna may think that’s a shocking allegation, but it’s actually the kind of initiative that lands you your own show.

Watch The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills online to get caught up in time for The Reunion: Part 19.

View Slideshow: 10 Craziest Moments in Real Housewives History

James Kennedy: The Vanderpump Rules Cast is SO Jealous of Me!

What a delusional little twit.

I would feel sorry for Vanderpump Rules Brit James Kennedy, but he runs his mouth so often that it"s almost impossible.

On last night"s reunion, Kennedy started going at it with Jax Taylor, claiming that the elder gent was jealous that he has dreamz of playing at Coachella.

Taylor found this amusing, telling Kennedy not to worry because he doesn"t "wanna be a DJ," which – he pointed out – involves nothing more than pressing a button on a computer.

Kennedy then told Taylor he wanted to punch him in his "fat throat."

Classic.

While I do admire Kennedy"s ability to dream big, his arrogance will be his undoing.  

He is not, as the cast points out, the "white Kanye West," nor should he aspire to be like the rapper (we have one Kanye West.  No need to duplicate.).

To make matters worse, Kennedy tweeted that he wished host Andy Cohen would have talked about his album more.

"Still think the pump album was somthing we should of talked about more @Andy – love u tho mate, thanks for dealing with all of us for hours," he wrote.

We saw the music video for "Don"t Look Down," mate.  We"re good.

Watch Kennedy curse out nearly each and every one of his co-stars below.  It"s entertaining as he*k.

Vanderpump Rules Reunion Recap: James vs. Jax!

Stassi finally faced Lisa head-on last night on the Vanderpump Rules reunion, James unleashed a tirade at Jax and whoa. Just whoa.

Grab a hat and hold the f–k onto it, people …

Watch Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 23 Online

On part three of the reunion, or Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 23, the two women came to blows about that sex tape thing.

Specifically, how the Stassi Schroeder sex tape fallout was handled and who did what (or should have or should not have done what).

If you watch Vanderpump Rules online, you know Lisa stepped in, but apparently, she never actually made Stassi’s ex hand over the tape.

Now, Stassi is obviously pissed and fearful that he will release it one day. If nothing else, maybe he’ll threaten to for a Season 5 storyline.

Meanwhile, Katie Maloney explained the return of “Tequila Katie,” while Ariana Madix kept hammering away at Kristen Doute’s comedy.

Ariana was being a little harsh, yet spoke for us all when she asked Kristen if she just decided one day to be funny after being so psycho.

She really is a little out there. Witness Kristen and James Kennedy’s one-night stand, in which case she claimed they boned in his car.

James, contrarily, said he bent her over the hood.

So she may or may not be a pathological liar as usual, but either way, she has sex with James Kennedy, which means she truly needs help.

Not to be outdone, James also outed Lala Kent for giving rim jobs, offered to whip out his penis and punch Jax Taylor in his “fat throat.”

Good times all around last night on Bravo, no?

“You’re jealous, mate. I said it once I’ll say it again ’till the day I die,” James said to Jax, hilariously adding, “I’m not going into detail.”

He did say he has a bigger penis, though. FYI.

Willing to pull it out to prove this after getting a “half-chub,” James informed his rival that he is basically a no-talent washed-up hack.

“I’ve got ten times more talent in the bag than this guy could ever dream of,” James said. “I’m trying to do Coachella one day and big things.”

Big things, people. Big. Not half-chub things.

View Slideshow: 37 Classic Vanderpump Rules Moments in GIFs

Vanderpump Rules Reunion Recap: James vs. Jax!

Stassi finally faced Lisa head-on last night on the Vanderpump Rules reunion, James unleashed a tirade at Jax and whoa. Just whoa.

Grab a hat and hold the f–k onto it, people …

Watch Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 23 Online

On part three of the reunion, or Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 23, the two women came to blows about that sex tape thing.

Specifically, how the Stassi Schroeder sex tape fallout was handled and who did what (or should have or should not have done what).

If you watch Vanderpump Rules online, you know Lisa stepped in, but apparently, she never actually made Stassi’s ex hand over the tape.

Now, Stassi is obviously pissed and fearful that he will release it one day. If nothing else, maybe he’ll threaten to for a Season 5 storyline.

Meanwhile, Katie Maloney explained the return of “Tequila Katie,” while Ariana Madix kept hammering away at Kristen Doute’s comedy.

Ariana was being a little harsh, yet spoke for us all when she asked Kristen if she just decided one day to be funny after being so psycho.

She really is a little out there. Witness Kristen and James Kennedy’s one-night stand, in which case she claimed they boned in his car.

James, contrarily, said he bent her over the hood.

So she may or may not be a pathological liar as usual, but either way, she has sex with James Kennedy, which means she truly needs help.

Not to be outdone, James also outed Lala Kent for giving rim jobs, offered to whip out his penis and punch Jax Taylor in his “fat throat.”

Good times all around last night on Bravo, no?

“You’re jealous, mate. I said it once I’ll say it again ’till the day I die,” James said to Jax, hilariously adding, “I’m not going into detail.”

He did say he has a bigger penis, though. FYI.

Willing to pull it out to prove this after getting a “half-chub,” James informed his rival that he is basically a no-talent washed-up hack.

“I’ve got ten times more talent in the bag than this guy could ever dream of,” James said. “I’m trying to do Coachella one day and big things.”

Big things, people. Big. Not half-chub things.

View Slideshow: 37 Classic Vanderpump Rules Moments in GIFs

Vanderpump Rules Reunion Recap: Ariana vs. Scheana! Stassi vs. Lisa!

On the second part of Vanderpump Rules’ Season 4 reunion special, Scheana Marie and Ariana Madix explored their rocky friendship.

Also, Stassi Schroeder and Lisa Vanderpump had it out, while Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright gave us an update on their relationship …

Watch Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 22 Online

When the second part of the reunion, a.k.a. Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 22, picked up where last week’s absurdity left off …

Brittany explained her dubious decision to move in with Jax (or associate with Jax in general) despite all that we all know about him.

Jax acknowledged that he does “stupid s–t,” the understatement of all time, but called Brittany his rock. Which he might even marry.

“Maybe he can steal her a wedding ring,” Tom Sandoval said.

Speaking of marriage, “I really, truly wanted Katie to abandon all hope,” Tom Schwartz said of his unorthdox proposal to Katie Maloney.

She totes loved it, but they didn’t consummate it that night.

Or for the next 14-15 nights, now that you mention it.

“We technically should have had sex that night, but I went to put taquitos in the oven, and [Katie] passed out after I got back,” Tom said.

A hopeless romantic, that Tom Schwartz.

In all seriousness, he said that he looks to Scheana and Mike Shay’s marriage for inspiration, as they’ve been through hell and back.

Scheana has also been through a different kind of turmoil with Ariana, with whom she has an … interesting, complex friendship dynamic.

Ariana mentioned the fact that Scheana Marie bashed Tom Sandoval to Ariana’s mom via text while they were in Hawaii on vacation.

Lala Kent said it best, “If someone did that to me and my mom, I best believe someone would be going down, and it would be you.”

Not going down in the hot sense, either.

Katie, for her part, feels like Ariana thinks she’s too good for everyone, while at the same time carries herself like a “Debbie downer.”

Ms. Madix fired back that “this is the most toxic environment I’ve ever witnessed in my life,” before everyone ganged up on Ms. Kent.

According to Katie, Lala is a rude, immature, shady liar who can’t make any friends. She has no problem landing boyfriends, however.

View Slideshow: Lala Kent: Best Instagram Pics of Vanderpump Rules’ Newest Star

As for Jax and Lala’s weird relationship, we all know he lied to Lala about Brittany coming into town to try to get her to go out with him.

Brittany, obviously, was not happy.

Jax denied, however, saying certain flirty things to Lala, while Lala just wanted him to own it because she owned up to flirting back.

This is middle school at its best.

One thing both of them agreed on is that if they had wanted to bone, they would bone, since we know both enjoy that act personally.

Okay, hard to argue that point.

Meanwhile, Stassi Schroeder appeared to explain why she decided to return back to the Bravo show after leaving for 12 installments.

Stassi claimed she had to “have a rock-bottom moment” to work on herself and finally turn things around and make it right with the group.

Was the group having it?

Not Jax and Tom Sandoval, who felt that Stassi had ulterior motives for returning, and zeroed in on Kristen Doute because she’s weak.

They don’t mean she’s weak in the physical sense – Kristen can deck people as hard as anyone – but emotionally. Easiest to manipulate.

Tom Sandoval was mad about the way Stassi treated Katie, but Stassi feels that Tom is out to get her and just has a weird vendetta.

Lisa just can’t take it.

“I think that if there wasn’t this show, none of you would have ever heard from Stassi Schroeder again,” Lisa said, and well, she’s right.

She, too, is pissed about the way Stassi spoke about her on camera, and we’re guessing Stassi’s apology fell upon deaf ears Monday.

“I feel that you hold things over my head, like I owe the rest of my life to you all of the time, and I feel like that’s not fair,” Stassi said.

Wait, what’s that … can you hear something? Somewhere, the world’s smallest violin is playing a sorrowful ode to Stassi Schroeder.

View Slideshow: 37 Classic Vanderpump Rules Moments in GIFs

Lisa Vanderpump & Eileen Davidson: Feud Over Dog Joke Heats Up!

Lisa Vanderpump and Eileen Davidson are locked in something bigger than a feud. 

In fact, it’s basically the Battle of Beverly Hills between these two. Neutrality is no longer an option. Pick a side or get blown to bits in the crossfire!

Okay, maybe were being a bit over-dramatic, but seriously, Lisa and Eileen do not like each other these days.

And it all started over some Chinese dogs neither of them has ever met.

Allow us to explain:

Last year, Lisa hosted a fundraising gala to raise money to prevent the mistreatment of dogs at the annual Chinese Yulin Festival.

Eileen skipped the soiree due to a prior engagement.

Last week, Davidson made a joke about Vanderpump’s love of dogs and all hell broke loose.

Now, Radar Online is reporting that the feud has gotten so bad the ladies are refusing to film together, and Lisa is demanding that Eileen make things right. 

“Eileen has still not apologized,” says one insider.

“Eileen told the other housewives that all she really meant by the comment was that Lisa should perhaps use her social platform to help actual humans instead of animals.”

The source adds that Lisa refuses to budge on the issue, and the situation has gotten so bad she’s requested that producers gve Eileen the boot.

“Lisa does not want to work with her again next season. She wants her gone,” says the insider.

Watch The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills online to see more mountains made out of molehills.

View Slideshow: 9 Times Lisa Vanderpump Proved She Was The REAL Sex Monster

37 Timeless, Iconic Vanderpump Rules Moments in GIF Form

Vanderpump Rules has brought us so much joy, sex, pain, heartbreak, sex and cringe-worthy awkwardness (and sex) over four seasons.

As we eagerly await its reunion, and its return next winter, here are some of the Bravo show"s most memorable moments … GIF style!

1. Stassi Schroeder Hits Kristen Doute

Stassi Schroeder open hand slaps Kristen Doute on Vanderpump Rules. It was such an epic moment, it’s worth watching on endless loop.

2. You’re 31 Years Old!

James Kennedy hits Tom Sandoval where it hurts. Then gets literally hit in response.

3. B!tch Go the F–k Home!

Ariana Madix sums up what we’re thinking so many times when we watch Vanderpump Rules.

4. We Are Deffo Boning!!

James Kennedy is excited about getting it in. Of course, later he will be trashing his girlfriend of choice in public, but whatever. Carpe diem.

5. Kristen Doute Drinking

Kristen doing what she does best. If she could only get paid to booze…then she wouldn’t have to worry about getting fired from SUR!

6. Lisa Vanderpump Enjoys Wine

Lisa likes to practice moderation. Yes, by SUR standards, she’s moderate.

View Slideshow

Vanderpump Rules Reunion Recap: Everyone Hates Kristen!

Under assault from multiple co-stars, Kristen Doute got slapped down (figuratively) on part one of the Vanderpump Rules reunion last night.

Meanwhile, Mike Shay made a memorable appearance as well …

Watch Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 21 Online

Technically Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 21, then reunion touched on many contentious issues that defined an iconic season. 

If you watch Vanderpump Rules online, then it was no surprise to you when Ariana Madix and James Kennedy both came at her. Hard.

There was a point (okay, there were many points) in which Kristen and James were co-dependent and in love with each other this year.

Since then, though … they’re not feeling one another.

Jax Taylor, for his part, accused James of using Kristen to get on the Bravo and she agreed with that assessment. But it cuts both ways.

Tom Sandoval said Kristen was the one using people, and only started boning James to get back at him. Can both theories be true?

According to Tom, he and James were about to move in together until Kristen swooped in and began dating the DJ and SUR busboy.

Clearly, they are unstable messes who use people.

As for Kristen’s recent apology tour, Ariana took her to task for offering a mea culpa she doesn’t truly mean after everything she did.

Tom Sandoval concurred that Kristen’s words don’t mean anything and that Doute was extremely casual and cavalier about all this.

Kristen said she has “no filter” and is “real” as one can be, though Tom said the only real thing about her is her efforts to break people up.

James’ parting shot? That he looks forward to watching Kristen take a massive s–t on all of them, so then he can say, “I told you so.”

Classy group of people we’re dealing with here.

As for the recovering Mike Shay, Andy Cohen actually hit Scheana Marie for being so ignorant about her husband’s addiction issues.

Scheana, who suggested that Mike just get a few drinks to get a buzz but then call it a night at one point, cried on the Bravo stage.

She said she didn’t know much about addiction, so she looked like a b!tch as a result. Maybe so, but they seem better these days.

Mike said he hasn’t had a drink in three months, though Lisa Vanderpump is skeptical that he has kicked his pill habit for good.

Will his sobriety last? Will his marriage? Stay tuned.

View Slideshow: 31 Classic Vanderpump Rules Moments in GIFs

Lisa Vanderpump & Eileen Davidson: Feuding Over Dog Killing Joke!

Just when we thought the feud between Lisa Vanderpump and Eileen Davidson was beginning to die down, it looks like the hot-tempered Housewives are at it again, thanks to a joke that Eileen made on her blog this week.

The ladies recently finished filming The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion show, and now they’re already back to work shooting a new season of the show.

Eileen has been documenting the experience on her Bravo blog, and it seems she royally pissed Lisa off while joking about a trip the ladies will be taking:

“Next week all of us, and our issues, are packing up and headed to Dubai,” Eileen wrote. “I wonder if there are any dogs there I can murder?” 

The comment was a reference to Lisa accusing Eileen of not caring about dogs being murdered in China after Davidson skipped an anti-animal cruelty charity event organized by Vanderpump.

Eileen has gone on record as saying she simply had a prior engagement, but clearly it’s still a touchy subject.

“Lisa and many of her fans were aghast after reading Eileen’s blog post,” one insider tells Radar Online. 

“Making light of Lisa’s passion to stop the barbaric torture of dogs at the Chinese Yulin Festival is just going too far!

“Everyone who knows Lisa knows that she has had many sleepless nights over her efforts so save these dogs from being murdered.”

It’s tough to take sides on this one, because Lisa’s work is certainly admirable, but Eileen’s joke really wasn’t that bad.

Sounds like Lisa is just angry that someone’s challenging her status as the alpha in the group.

Watch The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills online to see more mountains made out of molehills.

View Slideshow: 11 Most Obnoxious Quotes From The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 20 Recap: Touch in Public

Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 20 saw Lisa host one of the most anticipated events of the year to fete Katie and Tom’s engagement.

Of course, if you watch Vanderpump Rules online, you know there was major drama surrounding the guest list, and that’s not even all …

Watch Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 20 Online

We can’t believe we have to wait a week for the big reunion after the debauchery that was Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 20. 

Speaking of reunions, though … Stassi Schroeder and Jax Taylor held a mini-get together of their own, and it was actually civil.

Those two clearly have a spot soft for one another – even Lisa Vanderpump says they’re a great fit – and are totally gonna bone.

Maybe. Probably. Eventually. Totally. Again. At some point.

Of course, Jax is dating Brittany Cartwright at this point, and after he returned from court in Hawaii, he let her have it over some things.

Jax Taylor, of all human beings, telling someone he’s been giving so much and he’s not getting enough back in return is just … wow.  

It would be hilarious if he weren’t delusional and serious.

Fortunately (we suppose), Jax didn’t lash out at her by banging Stassi and instead took Brittany home to try out her new boobs. Aww!

Meanwhile, you knew that when Tom Schwartz and Katie Maloney’s engagement party went down, Stassi was going to wreak havoc.

Stassi and Kristen Doute showed up uninvited to stir up s–t, while the bride-to-be called out Lala Kent for trying to cut off her speech.

Later, at the after-party at SUR (yes, the engagement party had an after party), Lala shoved Kristen after she called her a walking STD.

Good times on Vanderpump Rules as always, people.

This cat fight would be much more entertaining if they weren’t beefing over that douche James Kennedy, but that’s neither here nor there.

Speaking of James, he got into an argument with Jax over accusations that he treats women badly. Yes … James is worse than Jax.

Lastly, Tom Sandoval performed his new song, “Touch In Public,” which officially rated a solid 8.5 on the Unintentional Comedy scale.

Bring on the reunion!

View Slideshow: 31 Classic Vanderpump Rules Moments in GIFs

Ariana Madix: I"m the #1 F--king Girl on Vanderpump Rules!

If you watch Vanderpump Rules online, you may recall the scene from earlier this season when Jax Taylor, crazy-eyed with liquor and cocaine rage, declared himself “the number one f–king guy” in his group of friends.

Earlier this week, past and present SUR-vers Stassi Schroeder, Kristen Doute, Scheana Marie and Katie Maloney appeared on Watch What Happens Live, where host Andy Cohen asked the viewers to vote on who should hold the title of “Number One F–king Girl” in the Vander-bunch and the result may surprise you:

Yes, winning by a wide margin with a shocking 39% of the vote was none other than Ariana Madix, who not only hasn’t been on Vanderpump as long as the other ladies, but also wasn’t a guest on WWHL at the time the voting took place.

If you don’t watch the show, then we really can’t help but wonder why you’re reading this article, but to put it in terms non-PumpKids might understand, that would be like if Ben Carson threw his hat back into the ring and suddenly dominated the GOP primaries.

Yes, in this analogy Ben Carson goes from soft-spoken neurosurgeon to sharp-tongued LA hipster.

We’re not sure who everyone else would be, but Kristen is definitely Trump.

Anyway, it was something of an unexpected victory, but well-deserved by Ariana, who took to Twitter to thank fans.

Of course, this isn’t Ms. Madix’s only honor in recent months. OK! magazine recently named Ariana and Tom Sandoval the sexiest couple of last year.

Clearly, the people love Ariana, who may have edged out Stassi as the smartest, sassiest blonde on Vanderpump.

The girls’s got a bright future. We doubt she’ll have to spend her nights getting bumped around behind the bar by a sweaty, coked-out felonious co-worker much longer.

Ariana Madix: I"m the #1 F--king Girl on Vanderpump Rules!

If you watch Vanderpump Rules online, you may recall the scene from earlier this season when Jax Taylor, crazy-eyed with liquor and cocaine rage, declared himself “the number one f–king guy” in his group of friends.

Earlier this week, past and present SUR-vers Stassi Schroeder, Kristen Doute, Scheana Marie and Katie Maloney appeared on Watch What Happens Live, where host Andy Cohen asked the viewers to vote on who should hold the title of “Number One F–king Girl” in the Vander-bunch and the result may surprise you:

Yes, winning by a wide margin with a shocking 39% of the vote was none other than Ariana Madix, who not only hasn’t been on Vanderpump as long as the other ladies, but also wasn’t a guest on WWHL at the time the voting took place.

If you don’t watch the show, then we really can’t help but wonder why you’re reading this article, but to put it in terms non-PumpKids might understand, that would be like if Ben Carson threw his hat back into the ring and suddenly dominated the GOP primaries.

Yes, in this analogy Ben Carson goes from soft-spoken neurosurgeon to sharp-tongued LA hipster.

We’re not sure who everyone else would be, but Kristen is definitely Trump.

Anyway, it was something of an unexpected victory, but well-deserved by Ariana, who took to Twitter to thank fans.

Of course, this isn’t Ms. Madix’s only honor in recent months. OK! magazine recently named Ariana and Tom Sandoval the sexiest couple of last year.

Clearly, the people love Ariana, who may have edged out Stassi as the smartest, sassiest blonde on Vanderpump.

The girls’s got a bright future. We doubt she’ll have to spend her nights getting bumped around behind the bar by a sweaty, coked-out felonious co-worker much longer.

Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 19 Recap: Effing James and Kristen!

On Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 19, Katie Maloney tried to force Lisa Vanderpump to have her engagement party at Villa Rose.

Meanwhile, James Kennedy banged Kristen Doute. On his BMW.

Watch Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 19 Online

If you watch Vanderpump Rules online on the reg, you know Katie and her co-stars have … interesting relationships to say the least.

Lisa sorta gave in, but had A LOT to say when Katie persisted that Stassi Schroeder and Kirsten Doute should be on the guest list.

The HBIC let Katie use Villa Rosa as long as she uninvited Kristen and Stassi. Those two understood … and then talked about crashing it.

That move should go over incredibly well, don’t you think?

Probably the #1 takeaway from the night was the fact that James Kennedy and Kristen Doute stopped fighting and were horny AF.

When they went back to her apartment to get it in, Stassi was sleeping in her bed, so … they resorted to railing each other on the BMW.

Not in, on. These two know how to keep it classy. And then break up in epic fashion and bang other people immediately as revenge.

Co-dependency is real, people. As is rampant narcissism.

Incredibly (or perhaps not, considering it’s these two), James had just admitted that he did sleep with Jenna before his split with Kristen.

He laughed about it. She cried about it and stormed out.

Yet, somehow, they were slapping bodies before we knew it … after which he told horny side piece Lala Kent about it, and she got jealous.

Just another day in the life of James Effing Kennedy.

While all this was going on, Jax Taylor was forced to take a red eye to Hawaii to face the consequences of sunglasses theft. In person.

Faced with a looming criminal case, Jax plunged into an existential crisis, and he began questioning everything in his sad, lonely life.

That includes his romance with Brittany Cartwright.

You’d think he would be inclined to get more serious after taking a long, hard look at his life, but he … told her he’s not a fan of marriage.

Obviously, she was far from pleased, but in Jax’s mind, he paid for her fake boobs, so she should at least be happy with that. #Logic.

Elsewhere, Tom Sandoval shot a music video in order to kick start his music career, but whether he makes it big is a different story.

Think he’s got what it takes to be a star?!

Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 18 Recap: Too Little, Too Late

Last night, on a drama-filled Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 18, Stassi Schoreder learned the answer to Justin Bieber’s eternal question:

Yes, in some cases it actually is too late to say sorry.

Watch Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 18 Online

Picking up where we left off the previous Monday, Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 18 found tensions peaking amongst the cast.

Never was this more true than with fallen icon Stassi.

Despite apologizing to Katie Maloney for being a bad friend, the latter said it was “too little, too late,” which brought the former to tears.

When Stassi told her (ex) friend that their bond was one of, if not the best she’s ever had, Tom Schwartz’s fiancee laid the smack down.

“No s–t, because your friendships are fluff with people,” Katie said. “I don’t think friends are disposable, period, or people are disposable.”

“I’m sorry, but I was a f–king amazing friend to you.”

After Stassi said she was “wrong” for her actions, Katie snapped, “Great, but too little, too late. I’ve got obviously amazing people in my life.”

“You know,” she said in a point that’s awfully hard to refute, “I just wouldn’t have time to go through that again. I would be a damn fool.”

Stassi had been kind of a d–k to peeps for years, so it’s easy to see why the instant reaction wasn’t “forgive and forget” on Katie’s part.

After a lengthier conversation, however, Katie did agree to work toward a reconciliation with Stassi – incrementally, and organically.

We’ll see how well those efforts take over time.

Elsewhere, Scheana Marie worried that she’d lose her best friend because of these developments, though Katie assured her otherwise.

For her part, Katie put Tom Schwartz on blast defending Ariana Madix after a few too many drinks, and told him to take his ring back.

Oh yes, it got a little heavy at their apartment. Wonder if there were any strings attached to that demand. (See what we did there?!)

Luckily, they chalked it up to tequila and put that behind them, while Jax tried his hand at babysitting for Peter’s girlfriend, and … wow.

One couldn’t realistically expect Jax Taylor to take good care of another human being, but still. Every rule was broken from the onset.

Check out the episode above in full to see.