Can you believe it?
No, neither can I.
Prince Harry has gone and impregnated some 19-year-old with his Anglo-German sperm, claims Life & Style.
“Harry’s hard partying has finally caught up to him,” some source allegedly told the magazine. “A 19-year-old blonde claims she’s pregnant with his child.”
A royal love fetus gestating in some girl’s uterus (name unknown, of course), and Her Majesty is not amused.
“Harry getting a one-night stand pregnant has been one of Queen Elizabeth II’s worst fears,” the insider told the rag. “An illegitimate child won’t get the same reception.”
Go on!
My three favorite quotes:
1. “The Queen adores Harry, but she would do everything in her power to keep the child a secret.”
Well, that won’t do!
2. “He’s a decent man, and would want to marry the girl and try to make it work. It’s the right thing to do.”
Chivalry is not dead!
3. “Harry could be forced to give up his title as prince.”
Listen, if Prince Albert can get away with it, why can’t Hazza?
These types of stories (see also: “Kate is pregnant with octuplets and is accepting free diapers from Costco”) are such fun to peruse in the checkout line at Ralph’s, but here’s a little tip from me to you: If you don’t see it mentioned via any of the royal palace social media accounts, or you can’t seem to find one credible source that’s chasing the story, consider it dumb. Consider it false. Consider yourself DUPED.
