Friday, May 13, 2016

Leonardo DiCaprio is Banging a Blonde Model Named Ela Kawalec

Well, he did it.


Leonardo DiCaprio has banged so many blonde models that we’re officially out of jokes about how unsurprising it is that Leonardo DiCaprio is banging a blonde model.



Last we checked in on Leo, he was “dating” Chelsey Weimar, a 19-year-old postal worker. Just kidding, she’s a model.


Prior to that, he was banging Roxy Horner, who was destined to briefly date DiCaprio from the moment her parents christened her Roxy Horner.


We hate to shock you to your very core without warning like this, but Roxy earns her living as a model.


We’re beginning to think that Leo allowed that bear in The Revenant to get a little frisky just for a change of pace.


You might think that having sex with blonde models is something Leo would eventually get sick of…Actually, no. You would probably never think that at all.


Anyway, here’s his latest flavor of the month – a Polish model named Ela Kawalec.



Page Six is reporting that Leo and Ela were spotted acting “couply” (whatever that means) at NYC hotspot Bodega Negra Wednesday night.


“They were dancing,” says one witness. “Leo was dancing with her in his arms and canoodling. They were doing their thing, bumping and grinding.”


Bumping and grinding? Who is this source, 1993 R. Kelly?


Anyway, Ela is an up-and-comer with only about 1,000 Instagram followers, so we’re pretty sure what Leo’s doing for her career actually qualifies as charity work.


Can someone get the Nobel committee on the phone?


Screw the Oscar; this man needs to get shortlisted for the Peace Prize ASAP!