By now, you’ve probably heard that Jessa Duggar has named her firstborn son Spurgeon Seewald.
Needless to say, the name is a bit odd, even by the standards of the Duggar family, which previously gave us such gems as Joy-Anna (not to be confused with her sister Johannah), Jinger, and Josh.
(Okay, “Josh” isn’t a weird name, but Josh Duggar is a total freakshow.)
Anyway, Jessa and husband Ben Seewald have explained why they chose the name Spurgeon, but some fans are still feeling mighty confused – and some of them are oddly pissed off.
So here are some of the most memorable comments from around the web. Feel free to offer your own thoughts on the name, just remember that while his parents are fair game, it’s not cool to poke fun at an infant.
Sadly, he’ll probably experience enough of that years from now.
(Once his high school classmates realize he comes from a famously chaste family, you know “Spurgeon the Virgin” will haunt him until his wedding day.)
Anyway, take it away, Internet jerks:
- “Good thing they homeschool cause that poor child. His nickname would be sperm germ or some psycho sh-t the kids these days come up with.”
- “Sounds like the name of a sea vegetable. Poor kid, he’s gonna be bullied.”
- “Good God. I’m starting to think these people pick ugly names for their kids to get attention. First Israel and now this. That poor child!!”
- “So sad, poor kid. Spurgeon Seewald, sounds like the name of Spongebob’s cousin!”
- Congratulations to the Seewald family! That being said, please do not use the nickname “Spurge”. Spurge is dirty slang for the male ejaculation (akin to splooge). Not trying to leave filth on this very clean page, but it does seem this particular audience would be in ignorance of that fact.
That last comment resulted in an interesting conversation about which terms for male ejaculate are considered socially appropriate.
Sigh. Good luck, kid. We’re just gonna call you Elliot, okay?