Tom Hiddleston has a plan, folks.
According to one of our favorite recent stories in The National Enquirer, the actor will soon be quitting his very successful career on the big screen.
How come?
Because he’s going to be a father!
Maybe! Possibly! If you choose to believe this celebrity gossip newspaper’s latest claim, that is.
It all starts with the fact that Taylor Swift has earned over $ 170 million in the past year. She’s the highest-paid celebrity on the planet, Forbes reports.
Therefore, Hiddleston wants to take advantage of the artist and is allegedly scheming to get part of her massive fortune by putting a baby inside of her womb.
“Tom is no fool, he’s going to knock her up fast,” a totally real insider tells the Enquirer. “Taylor is literally the golden goose.”
Yes, literally. Taylor Swift is literally the one and only golden goose.
“Once they have kids, he will be a stay-at-home dad and she will bring home the bacon,” the sources goes on to say, speaking in the way actual people definitely speak and adding:
“I’m sure he will make the occasional film, but when your wife earns that amount of money, why even bother working?”
Seriously… why bother?
Yes, Hiddleston earned his first Emmy nomination this month.
And, yes, he is set to star in a blockbuster next March titled Kong: Skull Island, which he previewed at Comic-Con over the weekend.
But whatever! He can stay at home with his love child and just count Swift’s money instead of working!
We have no legitimate reason not to believe this rumor.
Hiddleston himself says his relationship with Swift is real, shooting down talk that it’s some kind of public relations stunt.
Moreover, Chris Hemsworth says Hiddleston sort of seems happy with Swift.
So there you have it! Case closed!
And if you don’t believe the source material here for some reason, allow Donald Trump to assuage your concerns.
He said last week that The National Enquirer ought to be “respected” and that it probably should have won The Pulitzer Prize many years ago when it broke the John Edwards infidelity story.
What else do you need to know?
Let’s start thinking of a Tom Hiddleston and Taylor Swift baby name right now!
