Kourtney Kardashian: It"s Time For a Butt Lift!

On Sunday night, the Keeping Up With the Kardashians ten-year anniversary special aired on the E! network.

It was a time to reflect on how far the first familt of reality television had come, as well as to ponder the qualities that have made them such an irresistible draw to so many millions of Americans.

There’s Kris Jenner’s talent for marketing, the sisters’ impressive social media prowess, that one-of-a-kind family dynamic, and of course, their butts.

Obviously, Kim has the most famous backside of them all, but her sisters are no slouches in the ‘donk department.

We don’t want to get into a debate over whose butt is the best, because that’s like choosing your favorite Beatle.

There’s something for everyone, and there’s no wrong answer, unless you say Ringo or Khloe’s.

(Sorry, but they’re both too fake for our taste. Ringo’s not even his real name!)

That said, we think anyone creepy enough to compose an actual list would put Kourtney’s ass in one of the top spots.

But that doesn’t mean there isn’t room for improvement.

According to Radar Online, Kourt has already scheduled a butt lift procedure for sometime in the very near future.

That might seem strange, as Kourtney’s bikini photos never disappoint, and she seems to pride herself on being one of the least “enhanced” Kardashians.

But apparently, at 38 and after three kids, Kourt feels it’s time for a little preemptive maintenance work.

“Kourtney is sticking religiously to the ‘body plan,’ and according to her calendar, it’s time for a butt life,” says one insider.

Take a moment to pause and imagine an actual wall calendar with “BUTT LIFT!!!” written in red marker on today’s date.

That’s funny stuff.

Anyway, it seems it was alway Kourt’s plan to have work done before she starts noticing signs of age.

“Kourtney doesn’t want to patch herself up as she goes, like other Hollywood stars,” says the source.

And because she’s a Kardashian, it stands to reason that Kourtney is addressing the problem butt-first:

“Her butt is her pride and joy,” says the insider.

“She’s worked hard to keep it natural, but now it’s time for a little surgical help.”

Hey, with how big of a role butts have played in her family’s empire, we can’t blame her.

Plus, it might help make Scott Disick jealous, and that’s always a bonus.

View Slideshow: 42 Photos of Kourtney Kardashian Showing Scott Disick What He’s Missing

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"Big Brother" Star Jessica Graf Doesn"t Wanna be Prodded About Butt Poking

“Big Brother” star Jessica Graf — aka the anal invader — wasn’t feeling all the nudging about her butt poking … so she bailed. We got Jessica — flanked by fellow co-star and bf Cody Nickson — outside Clifton’s Thursday night in downtown…

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"Big Brother" Star Jessica Graf Doesn"t Wanna be Prodded About Butt Poking

“Big Brother” star Jessica Graf — aka the anal invader — wasn’t feeling all the nudging about her butt poking … so she bailed. We got Jessica — flanked by fellow co-star and bf Cody Nickson — outside Clifton’s Thursday night in downtown…

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Jenna Dewan Tatum: Mom-Shamed for Showing Her Butt!

If you listen to enough internet commenters who concern-troll celebrities, mothers shouldn’t eat anything (but also shouldn’t be “too thin”) and also should always look their best without ever looking “too good.”

This time, the celebrity getting unfairly slammed is none other than the beautiful and talented Jenna Dewan Tatum.

Her “crime” this time? Showing her butt.

Jenna Dewan Tatum is an actress, an exceptional dancer, and yes, she’s also a mom.

And guess what: she has a butt.

Barring an extremely rare birth defect or a horrifying injury, just about all humans have butts.

(Yes, even your friend who laments that they “don’t even have an ass”)

Channing Tatum’s bragged about her naked body before, so it can’t really be that surprising.

But when Jenna posted this photo to her Instagram, mom-shamers swarmed the comments to give her a hard time.

She looks so great!

Like, of course she does. But still.

Okay, done admiring her spectacular glutes?

Then we can move on.

So, this was part of Jenna Dewan Tatum’s “cheeky balcony” photo series on Instagram.

So far, there are just the two pictures in the series. We hope that the hateful responses haven’t discouraged Jenna from continuing with it.

Firstly, because no one should be discouraged from doing what’s fun or enjoyable for them because of other people’s hate.

But also just because she looks amazing and every photo of her is just a blessing.

These are classy, beautiful photographs of a talented and gorgeous woman.

So, naturally, the mom-shamers swooped in. Apparently, you’re not allowed to have a body anymore after you have a child.

Negative comment after negative comment said just about the same thing.

What varied was the level of direct rudeness.

“You have a kid . . . Shame on you.”

That one sounds like Jenna’s being shamed for being a mother, period.

“She’s a mother and married. Smh, disappointed at Jenna.”

Oh boy, that one’s mom-shaming and wife-shaming. A real twofer.

(Not that it would matter if he did, but Channing Tatum clearly doesn’t mind … and there’s a more-than-decent chance that he took the photo himself)

“Of course she is hot but poor Everly. What signals is she sending to her young daughter? Mummy’s bum is all over the net haha. Lead by example.”

Thanks, consummately British mom-shamer. (Mum-shamer?)

She’s not texting her butt to her 4-year-old daughter. Everly won’t be old enough to sign up for any social media for another 9 years.

And by that point, if not already, Everly will be mature enough to accept the fact that her mother has a butt.

(Unlike these commenters)

“Beautiful, but you are a mother. Be a role model for your daughter.”

Being confident in her beautiful body and showing exactly as much of it as she likes is a great way to role model for her daughter.

(This, by the way, was a photo that Channing Tatum had previously shared)

Jenna Dewan didn’t reply directly.

Too many celebrities get bogged down trying to respond to trolls.

This gives them exactly what they want, more often than not.

Instead, Jenna just shared some words of wisdom that seemed to be aimed at the trolls.

“You can tell who the strong women are. They are the ones you see building up one another instead of letting each other down.”

That’s not exactly a subtweet … but it’s something.

Jenna Dewan Tatum is a delight. We’re glad that she has a husband who’s worthy of her.

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Jessica Simpson Celebrates Husband"s Birthday with Butt Pic!

Eric Johnson is a very lucky man.

It’s his birthday, but he has a lot more to celebrate than turning 38. For example, his wife is one of the most gorgeous women on the planet.

And Jessica Simpson honored her husband on his birthday by flashing her butt for the world to see. Marriage goals, right?

You know, our first thought when we saw the picture below was:

“These buns are made for walking.”

That’s not a song that’s original to Jessica Simpson, but to those of us born after 1980, she was our introduction to “These Boots Are Made For Walking.”

(Specifically, her Pizza Hut “these bites are made for poppin"” commercial where she feeds a pizza bite to a boy who’s, like, 14, which is one of the cringiest things that we’ve ever seen on a commercial … which is saying a lot)

Anyway, Jessica Simpson is drop-dead gorgeous.

She’s married to Eric Johnson, whom we mostly know as “Jessica Simpson’s husband,” but he’s also some sort of sportsball player (the one with the ball shaped like Hey Arnold‘s head).

They’re all around a cute couple and we love stories about them and their kids.

But this photo is … considerably less family-oriented.

That’s quite a birthday outfit, if still a far cry from a “birthday suit.”

Also, Eric Johnson is holding two mugs of two different-looking beers.

(We refuse to say that he’s “double-fisting” the beers, especially in this context, but also in any context … please don’t make us explain why)

Maybe he’s holding Jessica Simpson’s drink for the photo, maybe he’s just living his best life because it’s his birthday.

Commenters felt a range of emotions in response.

“Girl, there’s a time and place for everything but… ‘Oh no Baby what is you doing?!’”

We love the Oh no baby what is you doing meme, but this really isn’t the place for it. Let her live her life.

“Highly inappropriate. Should be behind closed doors.”

It’s literally just her butt. Her head is clearly turned to the side and other people are present.

She’s not, like, fellating him.

Chill.

This is not even the first time this year that Jessica Simpson has celebrated a birthday in a way that included her butt.

Jessica Simpson flashed her 37-year-old butt on Instagram back in July.

Oh, and she was topless.

Don’t you feel grateful to live in the age of social media?

Remember, unlike genitals and the “dreaded” lady-nipples that can apparently scar minds or something, butts are totally allowed on Instagram.

There are even Instagram accounts dedicated entirely to butts.

Or … so we hear.

Jessica Simpson doesn’t always make sense, but she doesn’t have to.

She’s gorgeous and she’s happy, and that’s what matters.

Also, remember the craze where everyone was either sampling or covering “You Spin Me Right ‘Round” about a decade ago?

(It was the result of a viral video called “Meatspin;” do not look it up)

Jessica Simpson had the best of them and she even rewrote a lot of the lyrics.

Point is, she’s a treasure, and we look forward to her celebrations of even more birthdays in the future.

View Slideshow: Jessica Simpson and Eric Johnson Make Out Photos!

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Ariel Winter to Levi Meaden: Happy Birthday! Here"s a Butt!

If you follow Ariel Winter on Instagram, you may feel that you know the actress pretty well.

After all, whether it’s bikini pics, or outrage over tabloid rumors, Ariel isn’t shy about sharing.

But something that doesn’t always come across in her posts is her irreverent sense of humor – a quality she clearly shares in common with her boyfriend, Levi Meaden.

Meaden celebrated his thirtieth birthday over the weekend, which kicked off a new round of fretting and pearl-clutching over Ariel and Levi’s age difference.

But the couple didn’t seem bothered by the deluge of concern-trolling.

In fact, they seemed more in love than ever over the course of a weekend that included a birthday blowout and a stop by the 2017 Emmy Awards.

(It’s easy to forget, since she’s more famous for her social media presence than her acting these days, but Ariel is still on Modern Family, soon to begin 479th season on ABC.)

Ariel didn’t leave the ceremony with any new hardware for her mantel, but the girl definitelty deserves Hostess of the Year honors for throwing a birthday party that made the Emmys look like a snooze-fest in comparison.

And how did she accomplish that?

With a whole lot of latex and one seriously suggestuve cake.

(Not trotting out Sean Spicer for a gag about all those times he tried to swindle the American people and undermine the foundations of our democracy probably helped, too. Take note, Emmy producers.)

First the dress.

Latex is apparently Ariel’s favorite fabric these days, and we’re certainly not complaining.

If she’s happy to sweat out late summer in LA in a dress made from recycled Trojans, we’re happy to enjoy the view.

As for the cake …

Remember what we said about Ariel’s irreverent sense of humor.

Yes, in the fashion of so many Millennials these days, Ariel invited her boyfriend to eat some ass.

She posted the above photo on Snapchat, with a caption reading:

“He likes the cake ;)”

Actually, he looks a little unsure about the cake.

But hey, he was probably the only person at the Emmys who could say he’d eaten an ass-shaped cake in the past 48 hours.

Don’t try to steal his thunder, Spicer! We’ll know you’re lying!

View Slideshow: Ariel Winter: The Hottest Pics of an Internet Legend in the Making

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Ariel Winter: I"m Not a Whore, I Just Like My Butt!

Don’t you just absolutely love Ariel Winter?

Of course you do — what’s not to love?

That’s a serious question, by the way.

Because from where we’re sitting, we honestly can’t see one single major flaw with this amazing lady.

Ariel is so beautiful, and she’s so, so talented — we’ve been seeing proof of that in all the years that she’s been on Modern Family.

We also know that she’s ridiculously strong, because let’s be real, it must have taken so much for her to be able to get through her family issues.

Just think: she survived her mother’s insane rules and restrictions from the time she was a toddler.

She wasn’t allowed to have friends that were girls because they were “competition,” she was fed a very restrictive diet while she was a growing child so that she wouldn’t gain weight.

According to court documents in the case against her mother, she was physically and emotionally abused, so much that she was placed in her older sister’s custody when she was 14 years old.

And then, when she was just 15, she was emancipated.

Imagine working a full-time job and being responsible for your entire wellbeing at just 15 years old. Really just think about it.

Are you getting a healthy sense of appreciation for this girl yet?!

Besides all the character she’s shown in dealing with all those problems with so much grace, she’s also a total champion when it comes to her haters.

Because, in case you hadn’t heard about it, Ariel sometimes wears tight and/or revealing clothing.

And there are plenty of people who just love to criticize her for that.

She’s been called a whore, a slut, and some people have theorized that she’s literally a prostitute because she wears short shorts and low-cut tops.

It’s a little insane, to say the least.

But because of all that strength and character we mentioned earlier, Ariel is pretty good at dealing with that level of body-shaming and slut-shaming.

And she proved that in her new interview with the Hollywood Reporter.

At one point, she discussed her Modern Family character, Alex, who is known for her intelligence and who doesn’t share Ariel’s fashion sense.

“I do wish,” she said, “we could get out of the stigma that girls who are smart have to dress down and not care about appearance.”

“If you want to wear a short skirt and show your body like I do,” she explained, “it doesn’t mean you’re a whore. And it doesn’t mean you’re not one.”

“People call me stupid because I post photos of my butt when the real thing is, I love my butt. I love butts!”

Finally, a voice we can get behind.

“Why stifle yourself because other people can’t handle it?” she asked.

This isn’t the first time she’s spoken out about this topic, but it’s always such a treat to hear, isn’t it?

View Slideshow: Ariel Winter: The Hottest Pics of an Internet Legend in the Making

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Ariel Winter: I Don"t MEAN to Show My Butt All the Time!

Ariel Winter is known for her acting skills, her outspoken feminism, and also for being gorgeous.

She shares a lot of photos and she’s in the public eye a lot, so her looks get noticed. It helps that she wears a lot of stuff that shows off her curves.

But now Ariel Winter says that she doesn’t actually mean to be showing her butt as much as she does. Which is a bit of a surprise.

It might seem like Ariel Winter has been on television forever, but the Modern Family star is 19 years old.

She just happens to have been a child actor before she was an adult actor.

Almost ten months ago, Ariel Winter stirred up controversy by dating Levi Meaden, who turns 30 one week from today.

(Ariel and Levi just head their 9 month anniversary last month)

Even though they’re both adults, neither of them are old enough to be each other’s parent or whatever, their relationship got and still gets a lot of criticism.

Especially after Levi moved in with Ariel.

In part, maybe it’s because of their age gap, though less than 11 years isn’t the hugest age gap in the world, especially considering that they’re both hot.

(You know that it makes a difference in everyone’s minds if they’re both hot)

We suspect that the biggest “outrage” behind Ariel dating Levi isn’t their age difference or their disparate levels of fame.

It’s that a bunch of people thirst after Ariel and are mad that she’s dating somebody else.

Ariel Winter hasn’t been shy about showing off her butt.

It’s not unusual for her to just let her peach hang out in a bikini.

(Social media is a true gift)

But while we’ve also seen her badonkadonk whens he’s sporting daisy dukes and not much else, apparently she doesn’t just wear daisy dukes as an excuse to flaunt her butt.

In fact, the glimpses of her butt cheeks that people get when she’s wearing those cutoffs aren’t intentional at all.

Recently, Ariel Winter was spotted in daisy dukes while out and about.

They did basically nothing to conceal her butt, of course. That posterior cannot be tamed, clearly.

But yesterday, Ariel tweeted out that this isn’t deliberate.

“I literally do not try and show my ass when I wear shorts…my ass just eats them up and then I don’t notice…awkward af.”

(Note that “af” means “as f–k,” basically just meaning “very” in youthful parlance shared by Millennials and those members of Generation Z who are of tweeting age, though Ariel is definitely a Millennial)

In the past, Ariel has made some stellar points about body positivity, slut-shaming, and very specifically about how showing her butt isn’t a big deal.

And she’s right, it isn’t.

Barring some really rare birth defects or truly tragic accidents, everybody has a butt.

Yes, even the folks who lament that they “have no ass.” They have a butt, it’s just not particularly large or shapely.

Though Ariel Winter’s twerking shows that she knows the effect that her butt can have, she’s defended herself and her shorts-wearing before, saying that she’s not a whore for wearing short-shorts, basically.

That’s true. The clothing that you wear doesn’t make you promiscuous or a sex worker. And neither being promiscuous or sex workers are a bad thing.

We would point out that we’d advise everyone, not just Ariel Winter, to be conscious of how much of their bodies their clothing might reveal.

Show as much as you like, sure, but if you don’t want the parking lot to see your derriere when you put away your groceries, keep that in mind when you pick out your outfit for that day.

View Slideshow: Ariel Winter: The Hottest Pics of an Internet Legend in the Making

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Kristin Cavallari: Jay Cutler Butt Pic Was Shot at Nude Beach!

There’s more to that Jay Cutler butt pic than meets the (brown) eye … so says Kristin Cavallari!  Turns out, the famous Jay Butt-ler pic was taken during an outing to a nude beach during a romantic trip to Mexico back in March. Cavallari…

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Ariel Winter: Watch Me Work Out My Butt!

Ariel Winter"s glorious peach is a paragon of butts, but Ariel"s caboose didn"t just fall out of the sky.

She works for that. She earns that excellence through hard work.

Don"t believe us? Watch this video of Ariel Winter working out her butt and see for yourself.

Ariel Winter and her boyfriend, actor Levi Meaden, headed over to the gym for some exercise.

We"ll assume that they did other things, but the video that Ariel chose to share with her fans and followers was of her butt.

(And you can probably go out on a limb and guess that it was Levi who filmed her butt instead of what we can only imagine would be a very awkward gym employee)

Ariel Winter posted the video of her workout and added the caption:

"Working the [peach emoji] with @mackfit [devil emoji]"

The peach emoji has become as symbolic of butts as the eggplant emoji is representative of penises.

In fact, the peach emoji is so universally understood to represent butts that people sometimes just say "peach" when talking about someone"s butt.

When you see a butt like Ariel Winter"s, it"s pretty clear why people see parallels between a shapely badonadonk and the shape of a peach.

(Especially since the peach emoji, in its various forms, tends to resemble a butt — remember the outcry when one version of the peach emoji was temporarily altered to be flat? People wanted it looking more like a butt)

In the video, Ariel Winter supports herself with her arms and keeps her legs extended, using her butt muscles (mostly) to move her legs around while also using her abs to hold herself aloft.

Her feet are locked into these little sliding pads that run along the floor smoothly, making her muscles work harder thanks to a relative lack of friction.

She"s also wearing some special, shiny workout pants that look like they"re from a "90s scifi series that could have had a better wardrobe budget.

Color us intrigued.

It"s good that Ariel and Levi have activities like this that they can do together that are only public activities if they want them to be.

The couple"s come under fire for their age gap, even though their both adults.

Ariel is 19 and Levi Meaden will turn 30 in … two weeks.

Again, though, they"re both adults and they make each other happy. What more exactly do people need?

Ariel Winter and Levi Meaden moved in together back in May, after they"d been dating for, what? Half a year?

Some felt that Levi was taking advantage of Ariel.

In part because of her youth.

In part because she"s much more famous and successful, though they are both actors.

Honestly, we"ve seen no evidence of that.

Really, critics of their relationship are people — like, regular Instagram followers or whatever — who like to imagine that they have a shot with Ariel.

Therefore, they love her but they hate Levi Meaden.

We guess that jealousy of celebrity relationships is kind of normal … but we"re glad that Ariel"s found some happiness after facing such a rough childhood.

And now she has the ideal workout buddy who, obviously, is more than happy to film her glorious derriere for her fans.

Anyway, here you go:

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Taylor Swift Butt Groper David Mueller, I Can"t Get A Job!

The ex-radio DJ who lost big in the Taylor Swift ass-grabbing trial is desperate for a gig in radio — so much so … he’ll work for free. David Mueller says he’s put plenty of feelers out, but so far no bites. He’s so desperate he’s…

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Taylor Swift, Singer Scores Winning Verdict in Butt Grab Trial

Taylor Swift just got very important new fans … and they just unanimously gave her a huge win in her butt groping trial. The jury ruled David Mueller did indeed commit sexual assault by grabbing her butt at a meet and greet after a 2013…

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Nicki Minaj: Check Out My Bare Butt! I Love Being a Stripper!

When you’re rocking a new outfit, you want to snap some selfies to show off your look to all of your friends.

That’s even more the case for celebs, who want to flaunt their looks to fans.

Nicki Minaj didn’t stop at one selfie, though — she included a butt selfie in the mix, which totally upstaged her outfit. You know that a Nicki belfie is going to be absolutely legendary.

We’re actually going to lead with the belfie.

(No, we’re not terrible as spelling belfry or whatever — a belfie is a butt selfie, or a selfie that includes your butt, which can be taken up high to show your butt over your shoulder or it can be taken … like this one, below)

When we first saw Nicki Minaj, which was maybe back in 2009, we were taken aback by how stacked her badonkadonk is.

Like, there’s a reason that she laughs and taunts “Yeah, he looooove this fat ass!” in her song, “Anaconda.”

She knows from experience that people love her butt.

She doesn’t just mean sex partners — she means her fans.

And with this belfie, she’s giving the people what they want:

Nicki Minaj did not include a caption with this pic.

Frankly, this photo didn’t need one.

Her ass can speak for itself, you know?

(We’ll talk about the outfit in a moment, because it is so much)

She also shared another image — this time, of the same outfit as viewed from the front:

This time, Nicki posted a caption:

“New stripper boots, who dis? I love being a stripper.”

Now, we don’t think that Nicki Minaj is announcing that she’s diversifying her career by going into any kind of sex work, including stripping.

But that’s a great outfit and those are some outstanding boots.

We hope to one day live in a time when wearing boots like that is routine, and you might go shopping or to dinner and see people wearing boots that are that level of extra.

(The rest of that outfit, admittedly, might be a little too, uh, butt-tastic for a restaurant … we say that at the risk of sounding like prudes)

Also, from this pic, it sure doesn’t look like Nicki Minaj is pregnant.

We all knew that Nicki looks incredible.

Her legs, her butt, her whole figure — Nicki has never been shy about that.

While her outfit is new, our only real takeaway from these pics that we didn’t know before was that Nicki really needs to clean her mirror.

Those little flecks of dust or whatever are hella distracting from an otherwise mind-blowing, jaw-droppingly hot photo

(Use glass cleaner, though! Rubbing them with your hands will make it so much worse)

Still … we’re sure that plenty of folks never noticed the dust.

Nicki Minaj belfies have a way of consuming all of your attention.

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Taylor Swift Scores Win In Butt Groping Case

Taylor Swift just scored a big win in her butt groping trial … the judge threw out DJ David Mueller’s case against her. Mueller sued Swift, her mom and management team in 2015, saying they cost him his job after Swift alleged the DJ grabbed her…

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"Big Brother" Sexual Hijinks, Butt Poking Rampant, "You Punched My Vagina!"

The “Big Brother” house is a cauldron of sexual shenanigans … or so it seems judging from the 24-hour live feeds. It’s shocking … a male cast member grabbing Jessica Graf’s vagina, women butt poking men, men butt poking women, men butt poking…

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Taylor Swift Drawn Terribly In Court Sketches for Butt Groping Trial

Taylor Swift took the stand to testify this week in her butt groping trial — but from the way she was drawn in court sketches … you’d never know it was her. Sketches show Taylor in what appears to be a floral top, under an updo with loose curls…

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Taylor Swift"s Butt Groping Trial: "He Latched On to My Bare Ass"

Taylor Swift has come out swinging at her butt groping trial — testifying that a Denver radio DJ “grabbed my ass underneath my skirt” while posing with Swift for a photo and stayed “latched on” to her bare ass.  The singer is currently on…

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Ex-"Big Brother" Stars Rachel Reilly, Meg Maley Downplay Butt Poking Among Roommates

Rachel Reilly and Meg Maley are walking contradictions — on the one hand, they say a man pulling unwanted butt poking’s a big deal … but a woman doing it just ain’t. We got the ex-“Big Brother” stars Wednesday in WeHo and asked…

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"Big Brother" Houseguests Furious Over Unwanted Butt Poking

Several “Big Brother” competitors are claiming their butts are being violated by a fellow houseguest for weeks — who’s been captured on video jamming her fingers into various dumpers without consent. The anal invader is Jessica Graf — whose…

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Taylor Swift Wants $1 in DJ Butt Grab Lawsuit

Taylor Swift’s not duking it out in court with the DJ who allegedly grabbed her butt for the money — she’s doing it to set an example for others to say NO to ass grabbing. Taylor’s in court Tuesday with her lawyer, who just said in opening…

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