Thursday, September 8, 2016

Malia Obama: Photographed With Bong Following Pot Scandal

Summer may be over for college students all over America, but Malia Obama wisely decided to take a year off between high school and her first semester at Harvard, which means the only thing she’ll need to cram for is an introductory course on getting blazed.



And based on recent tabloid coverage of the First Daughter, we’d say Malia is thoroughly committed to her studies.


It all started when video that allegedly showed Malia smoking pot at the Lollaplooza music festival in Chicago surfaced online.



Shortly thereafter, sources claimed that Malia fled a house party moments before cops arrived and found that her fellow revelers had been smoking the demon jazz cabbage.


Hilariously, earlier this week, Malia trolled the haters and concern trolls who are far too interested in the social life of an 18-year-old girl by rocking a homemade “Smoking Kills” t-shirt at the Made in America Festival in Philadelphia.


Now, it seems that the eldest Obama daughter further demonstrated she has zero f–ks to give by partying in the presence of a ginormous bong while rocking the selfsame shirt.


Radar Online has obtained a photo of Malia standing next to a bong (complete with requisite Bob Marley sticker to ensure it won’t be mistaken for a giant test tube), reportedly while attending a Made in America afer-party.


Not only did the site publish the pic, they had a Photoshop expert examine it to make sure it hadn’t been re-touched:



“I have examined the image in detail,” analyst Alan Barry told the site.


“While what has been provided me is a very low resolution image, it is nevertheless clear to me that the image of Malia has not in any way been manipulated using photoshop or any similar software.”


Barry added:


“Specifically, her image was not added or overplayed in anyway to another image to create the final photo,” he said.


“That is, for better or worse, Malia Obama in the photo.”



Cue the Law & Order gong, this case has been blown wide open!


We now know beyond a shadow of a doubt that Malia Obama occasionally hangs out with people who smoke weed.


The only question now is: why should we care?


If you have any insight as to why certain media outlets are attempting to turn this into a thing, please let us know in the comments.