Saturday, October 31, 2015

Amy Schumer Hangs "Vacant" Sign from Her Vagina

Amy Schumer is single at the moment.


How do we know this for certain? Because the comedian has told us so, in the most Amy Schumer way possible.



The Trainwreck star accepted the Charlie Chaplin Brittania Award for Excellence in Comedy at the BAFTA Britannia Awards on Friday and made X-rated remarks about her dating life in the process.


Asked if she’s seeing anyone, for example, Schumer replied as follows:


“No. My vagina remains vacant.”


She then said the entrance fee is “at least five dollars,” which is a pretty outstanding deal, really.


Schumer has sort of made it her thing to say outlandish things while accepting trophies.


At the Glamour UK Women of the Year ceremony this summer, she joked that she may weigh 160 pounds, but she can still “catch a dick” any time she wants.


Then again, we doubt she was really joking.


At the Peabody Awards in late May, meanwhile, Schumer made out with Tina Fey in stage. It was hot!


In this case, Schumer went on to joke about the 1971 film Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, telling the audience:


“Watching the movie inspired my boyfriend at the time to take a trip up my chocolate river.”


This was followed by a long pause and then the quip:


“You guys don’t have anal over the pond?”


Man. Amy Schumer is the best. Here are many other reasons why we say this: