The world is letting out a long sigh of relief today.
It seems that despite the actress’ previous claims to the contrary, Lindsay Lohan is not pregnant … she just likes claiming she is whenever she’s desperate for attention, You know – like a crazy person!
In case you somehow missed it, Lindsay claimed to be knocked up during a recent social media tirade.
At first, the world dismissed it as the drunken ramblings of someone who long ago went off the deep end.
But then something strange happened…
Michael Lohan confirmed the pregnancy, claiming that Lindsay spoke with him the day after her Insta-rant and verified that she was indeed expecting.
Now it seems Lindsay simply woke up still drunk the morning after, because the evidence that she’s not pregnant keeps piling up.
First, Lindsay was caught smoking by the paparazzi.
We’re not saying she isn’t foolish enough to smoke while pregnant, but after a literal lifetime in the business, we’d like to think she’s savvy enough to not get papped while doing so.
Now, Lindsay’s mom and closest confidant has confirmed that no freckly demon child shall issue forth from her daughter’s woman, as foretold in Revelation.
At least not yet, anyway.
Dina Lohan has spoken with TMZ and confirmed that Lindsay is definitely not expecting.
Apparently, she was just so angry when she thought fiance Egor Tarabasov was cheating on her that she decided to pretend she’s pregnant because … Well, that’s when all logic breaks down.
The good news is, Lindsay can now smoke and drink all she wants.
The fantastic news is, she won’t be responsible for raising another human any time soon.
