Sending one’s boyfriend off to Ibiza is a risky proposition.
It’s sort of like sending Ryan Locthe into 7-Eleven to buy a Slurpee at 2 a.m. You just know he’s gonna get into trouble.
One of the Balearic islands, Ibiza is an archipelago of Spain in the Mediterranean Sea.
Who cares, right? You didn’t come here for a geography lesson, we know.
But Ibiza has become best known around the world for its lively nightclub scene, as nearly every European establishment has a summer outpost there.
Jane Park, a 20-year old resident of Edinburgh, is well aware of this fact.
Her boyfriend, Connor George, is about to head off to Ibiza on a trip with some male friends, but Jane fortunately knows exactly what to do about this:
Make him a t-shirt he must wear at all times.
The shirt has her face plastered on it, along with 20 rules Connor must follow while abroad.
Such as what, you may be wondering?
A few obvious ones:
No speaking to girls.
No photos with girls.
These are just examples of common sense, right?
There’s also the rule that Connor must “avoid eye contact with girls at all times,” which seems like it could be difficult to promise.
What if you just look up and a girl is staring at you?!?
Connor isn’t allowed to be a “wingman,” either, and he can’t get a “tattoo.”
Jane says she’ll chef his “willy” to make sure he abides by this guideline.
The one possible exception? If the tattoo is of her name.
But there’s no exception to this rule: Connor can’t be naked. Not ANYWHERE. Not, presumably, even the shower.
Jane also threatens to check her man’s phone and Snapchat inside and out, so Connor really might as well not even bring the former.
Internet sources say Connor has promised to keep the shirt on at all times.
We’d say this is the strangest display of love and affection that we’ve ever seen.
But check out the photo gallery above.
We’d be lying if we said that.