Jenelle Evans: Drunk at MTV Movie Awards After-Party?

Jenelle Evans still has her share of problems, but one thing the Carolina Hurricane has prided herself on in recent years is the fact that after a near-fatal battle with addiction that included multiple stints in rehab and an arrest for heroin possession, she was able to get sober.

Now, it looks as though Jenelle may have fallen off the wagon over the weekend while partying after the 2016 MTV Movie Awards.

Several sources are reporting today that Jenelle was visibly intoxicated at a star-studded after-party that she attended with boyfriend David Eason on Saturday night.

Evans reportedly stumbled while walking to her chauffeured car at the end of the evening and was saved from hitting the ground by Eason.

Jenelle last checked into rehab in 2014, and was believed to be sober ever since.

Now fans are wondering if Saturday night saw a momentary lapse in judgment from Jenelle, or if she’s been lying about her sobriety for the past two years.

Many are blaming Eason for Jenelle’s apparent relapse, but it’s not known if he was drinking at the awards or if he has any history of substance abuse.

Whatever the case, we hope that if the reports of her fall from the wagon are true, Jenelle will be able to find the help she needs.

Blac Chyna: Tyga Called Me a "Drunk Whore" & Tried to Take My Son Away!

Yesterday, Tyga offered his congratulations to his ex Blac Chyna and her new man Rob Kardashian on their recently-announced engagement.

“Everybody deserves 2 be happy. What some1 does for their happiness is not my concern, as long as it’s not interfering wit my happiness,” the rapper tweeted yesterday.

Given how tense their relationship is been in the two years since Tyga unexpectedly dumped Blac, many were surprised by the zen-like nature of T-Raww’s response.

Now, Blac is claiming that it was all for show, and that Tyga has been brutally mean to her in the days since she announced her engagement to Rob. 

Reps for Blac tell TMZ that the former couple has not spoken directly in months and that their only contact is through email.

Tyga has reportedly informed Blac that he plans to use her relationship with Kardashian against her in court.

Sources say Tyga has already filed papers seeking full custody of King Cairo, his 3-year-old son with Blac.

Even more shocking is the fact that Tyga has been accused of using ugly language to describe Blac online, allegedly referring to her as a “drunk whore,” “deadbeat mama,” and “nasty b-tch.”

Sounds like Rob may soon find himself in the middle of a very nasty legal battle.

View Slideshow: Blac Chyna and Rob Kardashian: Their Relationship In 14 Photos

Joe Giudice: Punished For Reporting to Prison Drunk, Insiders Claim

It’s only been two weeks since Joe Giudice reported to prison, but it looks as though Juicy Joe has already figured out a way to royally piss off prison officials.

According to Radar Online, Giudice was visibly intoxicated when he turned himself in to begin serving his sentence on March 23.

“He was a total mess,” reports one insider at Fort Dix Correctional Institution, adding that Giudice appeared to be “completely wasted.”

Joe reportedly spent his final morning at home knocking back drinks with his newly-sprung wife, Teresa Giudice.

Sources say by the time he showed up at the penitentiary at noon, the 43-year was three sheets to the wind, in direct violation of prison rules.

Now, two weeks later, Joe is still paying the price for his final bender.

“They couldn’t believe he made a mockery of the court by immediately breaking the rules,” says the source.

Giudice has struggled with alcoholism for years, but he may not have realized how hefty of a price he would pay for what corrections officers consider a major infraction:

Attorney Miles Feinstein, a prisoners’ rights expert, says Joe could now wind up serving his entire sentence in a maximum security setting:

“They will not show him any leniency. He doesn’t have a second chance.” Feinstein tells Radar.

“If it’s true, it shocks me. If it’s caused a maximum security designation, then it’s going to be quite different for him than being in a lower tiered level of the federal prison system.”

Watch The Real Housewives of New Jersey online to see the Giudices in happier times.

View Slideshow: 23 Celebs Who Did Time Behind Bars

RHOC Cast Injured In Dune Buggy Crash: We"re OK! We Weren"t Drunk!

So, that went well.

On April 2nd, Tamra Barney, Vicki Gunvalson and Heather Dubrow were filming for the upcoming season of The Real Housewives of Orange County.

Barney was at the wheel of a Polaris RZR (a dune buggy) in Glamis, CA (a desert town near the Arizona border), when it flipped over after going over a hill.

Sources told TMZ over the weekend that Barney “had been warned several times by the people training her to slow down.”

One witness saw Gunvalson throw up and complain that she couldn’t feel her fingers, and both ladies reportedly complained of neck and back problems.  

Both Judge and Gunvalson were airlifted to the hospital, but were thankfully released over the past few days with no serious injuries.

Judge updated fans via Facebook last night:

So many text , tweets and phone calls asking if this is true. I can confirm it is. Thank you for your prayers and concerns. We are both beat up but very lucky to be alive. I’ve never been so scared in my life. As the driver I have an overwhelming amount of guilt and just happy that the 4 of us are alive. 

Gunvalson took a photo of the helicopter that airlifted them (weird) and wrote:

Thank you everyone for your thoughts and prayers. #itwasntourtime

Though reports never mentioned Dubrow, it’s thought she was involved, per her own Instagram update:

“Deep sense of gratitude for my family today. #blessedbeyondmeasure Thank you to all who follow us , we are honored.“

Judge was livid about reports insinuating that she was intoxicated at the time of the accident.

“TMZ get your story straight! whoever is giving pictures and statements you are an insensitive POS,” she wrote on her Facebook page.

“No alcohol was involved I am currently NOT drinking due to my upcoming fitness competition and it was 11:00 in the morning. No one was training me or telling me to slow down. I have been riding since I was young.

“It was an unfortunate accident coming off a top of a dune and landing wrong. What is wrong with people? are they that miserable that they want someone else to look bad?”

Lamar Odom: Drunk and Depressed At Bar?

It’s been a little over five months since he overdosed at a Nevada Brothel, so fans were concerned to learn that Lamar Odom had cocktails with a few friends at Johnny O’Brien in Sherman Oaks, CA.

Witnesses at the bar told Radar Online that Odom looked glum.

“He looked sad, or even serious, I would say, when he came in and ordered a drink,” the source said.

“I definitely did not get the party vibe from him like he was looking to have fun or have a good time.”

Hours after being at the bar, Odom would join Khloe Kardashian and her family for Easter service.  Until then, he was looking to blend in and tune out.

“The bar was playing old school hip-hop that night and while Lamar’s friends were singing along and having fun, Lamar stared aimlessly at the TV sipping his drink,” the source claimed.

Staff at the establishment told TMZ that Odom ordered three Remy Martin cocktails and paid for them himself.

Radar’s source pointed out that Odom “didn’t talk to anyone, not even his buddies. He paid for the drinks and sat on a booth away from the crowd with his sunglasses and hoodie on/

Odom arrived around midnight and left around one am.

Kardashian posted cryptic tweets earlier today, but it’s not clear why.

“Please be kind always because everyone you meet is fighting an internal battle you know nothing about,” she wrote. 

“It takes nothing to be kind. In fact it takes more energy to spew negativity. Let’s practice kindness &the contagious act of a smile today.”

View Slideshow: Lamar Odom: In Thoughts, Prayers of Stars Everywhere

Miley Cyrus Gets "Real Drunk" to Celebrate 10th Anniversary of Hannah Montana

Miley Cyrus is feeling nostalgic, y’all. Also, drunk or stoned. Sometimes it’s hard to tell which with her.

You see, today marks the tenth anniversary of the premiere of Hannah Montana, the show that introduced America to the 13-year-old daughter of country one-hit wonder Billy Ray Cyrus.

Obviously, Miley’s career has come a long way since then.

She twerked on Robin Thicke at the VMAs.

She smoked her weight in weed on Instagram.

And, of course, Miley got naked so, so many times.

We’re told she even found time to record some music.

Anyway, it’s still morning on the West Coast, but something tells us Miley decided to break out Billy Bong Thornton a bit early in celebration of her big anniversary, as she posted the following insanely long rambling message on Instagram:

View Slideshow: Miley Cyrus Instagram Photos

“Sending love to all my cast members on this anniversary. To the world it’s a celebration of 10 years but for us the journey began way before the world had any clue who the f–k any of us are .

“There was a very long auditioning process, and many chemistry reads which really is what sold the show to the producers and channel because no matter what went on over the years (which none of you have any clue about but It was like the real world but more hormonal teenagers) our love for each other was unquestionable.

“Even though I feel disconnected to who I was at that time I will always feel eternally grateful for the opportunity and platform I was given

“Even though HM is chopped up into little tiny pieces and buried in my backyard she will always hold a very special place in my heart! Celebrate this day with us!

“Get real drunk and remember #HM4EVR send pics gettinnnnn buck wild in honor of this special day!

“#letsplayadrinkinggame watch HM and every time someone says her name take a shot! Yiew hew!”

Yes, that’s Miley’s rant after we cut entire paragraphs out. 

Let’s make sure this girl never wins an Oscar. Her acceptance speech would make your dealer’s latest rant about his pet snake seem downright succinct by comparison.

View Slideshow: Miley Cyrus’ Weirdest Instagram Photos

Justin Bieber is "Maybe Drunk," Definitely Rambling in Concert

Listen up, people.

Justin Bieber has something to say.

Justin Bieber actually had a whole lot to say on Monday night in Los Angeles after he completed a concert at Staples Center and then headed over to 1Oak nightclub to party.

As seen in the footage below, the artist has difficulty balancing himself on the deejay booth as he rambles on and on to a crowed of surprised, likely confused attendees.

"Yo, you guys having a good night tonight? I said, are you guys having a good night tonight?," Justin says.

"See, I"m not gonna give like a 30 minute speech. I"m not Kanye West. I love Kanye. I only got a little bit to give though."

Bieber then proceeds to basically make just like Kanye West in terms of the direction, or lackthereof, of his words.

"All I"m gonna say is let"s have a good night, let"s enjoy ourselves. Let"s be ourselves. I think the thing the world struggles with most is just being ourselves. I think people hate on people that just are themselves."

Profound stuff from The Biebs. But he wasn"t finished.

"Maybe I"m drunk," he says here. "Maybe I"m just speaking real s–t. But I feel like a lot of the reason why so many people hate on me is cause I"m just myself. "

Concluded the artist, who may be trying to win back Selena Gomez but who may wish to use a different tact if so:

You can hate on me for being myself, too, but I feel like if you just are yourself and are OK with being just yourself and making spontaneous decisions of just wearing whatever you wanna wear and doing whatever you wanna do…

You"re gonna make bad decisions sometimes but you ultimately wanna make good decisions, so let"s try to make the best decisions we can possibly know or feel and let"s have a good night.

Well… okay then!

Check out the possibly inebriated rant below:

Blake Shelton: I Am NOT a Drunk, and I Never Peed on a Mailbox!

In October of last year, we reported that Blake Shelton is suing In Touch magazine for claiming that he’s a wild, reckless alcoholic who’s headed for rehab.

Since the wheels of justice often turn slowly, the case finally went to court this week, but only after In Touch fired back, claiming in legal docs that Shelton is indeed a drunk.

Shelton is suing the tabloid for $ 2 million, but according to a new report from TMZ, he also has a laundry list of retractions that he’s demanding the editors print.

Some highlights include:

• “I have never been to rehab.”


• “I did not then nor have I ever hit rock bottom.”


• “I do not drink excessively, binge drink or have a drinking problem.”


• “I do not drink vodka before 11 AM.”


• “I am never drunk, intoxicated, or unable to perform my job on ‘The Voice."”


• “I do not slur my words or stumble when I drink.”


• “I have never urinated on a mailbox.”

Apparently, Shelton is most pissed about the fact that the tabloid is claiming he cheated on Miranda Lambert while the singers were still married.

“My ex-wife Miranda Lambert did not catch me with a bunch of naked women in our Tennessee home,” the documents read.

Look, Blake, we’re sure if you fight hard enough you can get the magazine to go back on this stuff, but you’re gonna cost yourself some serious country music cred. Just sayin’. 

View Slideshow: Miranda Lambert & Blake Shelton: Through the Years

Kesha Appears Drunk While Accepting Award, Fans Express Their Concern Online

By now you"ve probably heard about Kesha"s legal battle with Sony and mega-producer Dr. Luke, whom she claims sexually assaulted her on several occasions.

Numerous celebrities have voiced their support for Kesha, and over the weekend, she received the Human Rights Campaign"s Visibility Award.

Unfortunately, the recent turmoil in Kesha"s life appears to have taken a toll, and it seems that for many who watched her acceptance speech, her unusual demeanor may have overshadowed her message.

"She must be on antidepressants or something. she suddenly put on a lot of weight," wrote one YouTube commenter. "Seems kinda distant and slurring speech. Typical of someone who"s body is still getting used to new meds. Hope she is ok."

"She looks so sad and broken. Its sad to see such a good person go through what she"s going through.," wrote another.

Thankfully, most fans focused on the content of Kesha"s speech, and not her apparent physical difficulties.

"Her speech was really meaningful even though something wasn"t right about her behavior," wrote one viewer.

Kesha acknowledged that she"s been struggling emotionally in recent weeks, saying, "As many of you know I am going through some personal things that have been really intense and hard lately and I just want to say thank you for any support I have received."

Her situation would be a difficult for anyone to endure, and such intense public scrutiny surely only compounds the pressure.

Here"s hoping Kesha receives whatever kind of help she may need.

 

Kesha Appears Drunk While Accepting Award, Fans Express Their Concern Online

By now you"ve probably heard about Kesha"s legal battle with Sony and mega-producer Dr. Luke, whom she claims sexually assaulted her on several occasions.

Numerous celebrities have voiced their support for Kesha, and over the weekend, she received the Human Rights Campaign"s Visibility Award.

Unfortunately, the recent turmoil in Kesha"s life appears to have taken a toll, and it seems that for many who watched her acceptance speech, her unusual demeanor may have overshadowed her message.

"She must be on antidepressants or something. she suddenly put on a lot of weight," wrote one YouTube commenter. "Seems kinda distant and slurring speech. Typical of someone who"s body is still getting used to new meds. Hope she is ok."

"She looks so sad and broken. Its sad to see such a good person go through what she"s going through.," wrote another.

Thankfully, most fans focused on the content of Kesha"s speech, and not her apparent physical difficulties.

"Her speech was really meaningful even though something wasn"t right about her behavior," wrote one viewer.

Kesha acknowledged that she"s been struggling emotionally in recent weeks, saying, "As many of you know I am going through some personal things that have been really intense and hard lately and I just want to say thank you for any support I have received."

Her situation would be a difficult for anyone to endure, and such intense public scrutiny surely only compounds the pressure.

Here"s hoping Kesha receives whatever kind of help she may need.

 

James Kennedy Music Video: Glow Sticks + Drunk Driving FTW!!!

WTF am I watching?

James Kennedy- DJ, SUR bus boy and aspiring music producer (I guess?) – has released a music video for his techno single, "Don"t Look Down."

If there"s a storyline, then I"ve missed it.  

The video"s director choose a few different locals for the shoot, none of which have anything to do with the song"s title (unless the luxury hi-rise has meaning in the literal sense).

In the opening, Kennedy wakes up in said luxury hi-rise in Century City (the same one where Candy Spelling owns a place).  From his bed, Kennedy takes a shot of Patron, ready to take on the day.

In the next scene, Kennedy takes yet another shot with Max Vanderpump-Todd while valet brings someone else"s Rolls Royce around.

Properly lubricated with at least two shots of tequila at this point, Kennedy gets behind the wheel of the Rolls Royce as Max takes his seat on the passenger site (their bottle of Patron in his hands).

The joyride consists of changing lanes without a signal, Kennedy tapping arrogantly along to his beat and Vanderpump-Todd sticking his entire body out the window.

WHERE ARE THE COPS!?

The next scene finds Kennedy waving glow-sticks in a traffic tunnel in broad daylight, followed by him pacing through an English garden, looking equal parts sullen and perplexed.

The music video ends with a rewind of blue painted pour all over Kennedy"s body, which he then glitterbombs.

I don"t get it.

Blake Shelton to Tabloid: Don"t Call Me a Drunk!

In case you somehow weren’t aware, Blake Shelton is a bit of a drinker.

And by “a bit of a drinker,” we mean the guy could probably go shot-for-shot with Keith Richards and still show up to work the next day (though he might get a little nauseous when he spins his chair around on The Voice.)

Over the years, Shelton has welcomed his reputation as a country lush in the tradition of  – well, just about every other country singer in history.

Anyone who follows the man on Twitter knows that Blake’s drunk tweets are some of the funniest things on social media, and the man’s admitted to beating up on his liver in multiple interviews.

Even so, reports that Shelton’s drinking is out of control have upset the singer in the past, and he recently took legal action against In Touch after the tabloid ran an article claiming that he’s headed to rehab.

Unfortunately for Blake, rather than settling out of court, the magazine is standing firm, claiming that Shelton is trying to have it both ways by publicly boasting about his booze intake, then complaining when others express concern:

“Shelton ignores that he has staked his reputation on heavy drinking: he tweets more than 15 million Twitter followers almost daily with messages crowing about how much he drinks and is famous for his signature Twitter tagline, ‘Drunk,"” lawyers for In Touch write in a recently filed motion to strike.

“Shelton also ignores the years of press – which went unchallenged by any legal claims – documenting how his ex-wife, among others, were so upset by his alcohol consumption that she told him to go to rehab.

“By this action, Shelton attempts to walk back a public image he created. Yet the law does not allow for selective amnesia.”

Yes, it sounds like Blake will either have to drop the case or prepare for a serious legal battle.

Considering he’d probably like to avoid being publicly grilled about his drinking habits, our money is on the former.

Snooki: I Was Blackout Drunk on Kocktails With Khloe!

If you’ve been watching Kocktails With Khloe on FYI, then we suppose you can just skip this article.

Now that both of them are gone, here’s an interesting tidbit for the 7.3 billion or so who had no idea FYI was a cable channel. It turns out Kocktails With Khloe is more than just a alliterative title: the sassiest Kardashian really gets her guests hammered!

Kocktails with Khloe Clip: When Snooki Met Khloe…

Or at least, she really got the Jersey Shore’s most infamous drunken munchkin hammered, which may explain why Snooki tells a remarkably candid tale of Khloe being rude as hell in the clip above.

It’s no surprise that Snooki was one of Khloe’s first guests.

After all, only Scott Disick has rivaled Snooks in terms of reality star drunkenness, and we doubt the Lord will be stopping by for drinks anytime soon (what with the all the rehab and overdoses and whatnot).

Of course, in recent years, Snooki adopted a healthier lifestyle and become a sort of mascot for moms who still find time to workout and tan 8 times a week. 

So obviously, Ms. Polizzi’s tolerance isn’t what it used to be, which may explain why she got completely sh-tfaced while filming the show:

Kocktails with Khloe Clip: Snooki Speaks on Adoption

“I was wasted,” Snooki said of the experience in a recent interview.

“I had three [drinks], and I blacked out. So when I watched the episode I’m like, oh my god I don’t remember this, I’m slurring my words, you’re so embarrassing. So I don’t remember that whole interview.”

That may explain why Snooks drunkenly lied her ass off in the clip above.

“I was like, ‘I have like ten brothers and sisters,"” said Snooki.

“I’m like ‘what are you talking about? It’s only like one or two’. So I exaggerated times ten. That was Snooki in the interview,” she said. “My alter-ego.” 

Yes, apparently Snooki and Nicole are two different people. She probably came up with that idea when she looked in the mirror one night and saw two different people.

View Slideshow: Jersey Shore Cast: Where Are They Now?

Will and Kate Get The Crown! Camilla Deemed Too Drunk To Rule!

Drunk in-laws, amiright?

In this chapter of “insane royal rumors,” we visit the life and times of Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall.  Specifically, her love for the bottle.

According to Celebrity Dirty Laundry, Camilla gets drunk quite often and verbally abuses Prince Charles.  He’s so terrified of her, it’s said, that he won’t even bring up a “long-term inpatient rehabilitation facility” for fear that she’ll somehow beat the crap out of him (personal protection officers be damned!).

“Poor Prince Charles has taken the brunt of Camilla Parker-Bowles verbal abuse if Royal insiders are to be believed,” CDL write.

“The Duchess of Cornwall supposedly gets raging drunk and screams at the Prince of Wales – once telling the heir-to-the-throne to ‘grow a pair and demand his birthright ‘from Queen Elizabeth.”

Camilla’s drunken rants are becoming so bad that the Queen will probs abdicate the throne after her 90th birthday in April, and hand the crown over to the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge.

Listen, I’m sure there has been a lushy consort here and there in the grand history of the British monarchy.  You do what any good royal PR office would do and let her dry out in the country.

Also, there is no way on God’s green earth that 1) Her Majesty will abdicate the throne 2) She’ll “skip” Charles in favor of Prince William.

Charles is the rightful heir to the throne, and will become King when his mother passes away.

As for his relationship with Camilla, anyone who knows anything about the royal family can see that he adores her, and vice versa. 

Drunk Florida DOCTOR Attacks Uber Driver in Insane Video! Watch!

Generally, when a drunk Florida resident does something newsworthy, it’s bound to be amusing. 

When the shenanigans involve automobiles, it’s usually less entertaining because of the very real chance that someone could get injured or killed, but thanks to Dr. Anjali Ramkissoon we now get to enjoy an intoxicated Floridian acting stupid in a car without fear of her destroying anyone’s life but her own:

Florida Doctor Attacks Uber Driver!

Yes, the woman in the video above is a fourth-year neurology resident who proves once and for all that sometimes you can make the right decision (like calling an Uber when you’re plowed) and still f–k up in epic fashion.

We don’t get to see how it started, but for some reason, Dr. Ramiskoon winds up flipping out so hard on her Uber driver that she draws a crowd.

The fact that there’s no way in hell he’s driving this woman home doesn’t stop her from getting in his car and tearing it apart like a toddler with a bellyful of appletinis.

The video ends when Anjali walks away from the scene, but according to witnesses, she didn’t get far:

“Once in handcuffs, she then tried kicking some of the police officers on the scene,” the user wrote.

“It was only when they put her in the police car that she started crying, apologizing, and claiming that she would lose her medical license (she claimed to be a neurologist) if she got arrested.”

Sources say the parties agreed on a cash settlement in lieu of arrest, but the future of Dr. Ramiksoon’s career in medicine remains in question.

She may not be as memorable as the Florida woman who stole a reporter’s car on live TV, or the one who attacked a cop at the DMV last month – but Dr. Anjali Ramkissoon has definitely earned a spot in our Florida Woman Hall of Shame:

View Slideshow: Florida Woman: Strange But True Stories

Track Palin Arrested for Assault, Being Drunk with a Gun

Sarah Palin spent Tuesday afternoon publicly showing her support for Donald Trump.

But she may want to get back to Wasilla, Alaska as quickly as possible. Someone close to her at home could use some support right about now.

According to police reports, Track Palin was arrested on Monday night and charged with fourth-degree assault… interfering with the report of a domestic violence crime … and possession of a firearm while intoxicated.

The New York Daily News reports that the 26-year old son of the former Vice Presidential candidate was at the center of a domestic disturbance call around 10 p.m.

Track Palin allegedly punched and kicked his girlfriend and then proceeded to hold an assault rifle near his head, threatening to kill himself.

“Do you think I’m a p—y?” Track reportedly said, also asking: “Do you think I won’t do it?”

Palin was booked without bail and his arraignment was scheduled for Tuesday, January 19. All these charges are (somehow) only Class A misdemeanors.

Track is the oldest of Sarah Palin’s five children.

The unidentified woman had “bruising and swelling around her left eye,” according to police, and “complained of pain to that area as well as to her right knee.”

Authorities later found an unloaded AR-15 assault rifle on the kitchen counter.

Track is a U.S. Army veteran who spent a year deployed in Iraq.

He is divorced with a daughter named Kyla and he reportedly broke his ribs during a drunken brawl at an Anchorage party in September 2014.

View Slideshow: 18 STUNNING Celebrity Confessions

Mel Gibson: Drunk at Whole Foods With Fork in Mouth!

It’s been a strange month for Mel Gibson. Of course, that’s probably true of just about every month of Mad Mel’s existence.

Last week, Gibson was roasted by Ricky Gervais at the Golden Globes and found himself in the unusual situation of being asked to define the term “sugar tits” in front of Hollywood’s biggest stars and a TV audience of millions.

Mel’s not the most stable guy to begin with, so reports that the public humiliation he suffered at the Globes may have set him off on a bender aren’t terribly surprising.

Radar Online is now reporting that Mel appeared to be drunk during a recent visit to a Whole Foods location outside of Los Angeles.

“Mel went into the Whole Foods store in Thousand Oaks and was stumbling around,” says one witness.

“He came in with a big white fork in his mouth and he seemed unsteady. He tripped a couple of times and he was telling people he wasn’t really Mel Gibson.”

The onlooker says that when other customers recognized him, Mel insisted he wasn’t Mel (we don’t blame him) and treated them like employees of the store.

“‘How much is this?’ Mel would ask about the same item repeatedly, as if not understanding,” one source says.

“He was saying he couldn’t find what he wanted and he couldn’t remember what he wanted. He looked like he was going to fall asleep.”

It might seem ridiculous for someone as well off as Mel to inquire about the price of his groceries, but this is Whole Foods we’re talking about. Just kidding, yuppies!

Apparently, Mel’s embarrassing behavior continued as he made his way to the checkout line with a plastic fork dangling from his mouth:

“He was extremely rude to people,” says one witness.

“It was a real turn-off because people saw that there was something going on with him, he wasn’t behaving politely at all and seemed unsteady.

“Mel went to the checkout line and tried to pay with his credit card but had to insert in three different ways for it to work.”

On the plus side, Mel left the store without offering colorful nicknames for any female employees’ breasts, so the whole thing is a win by his standards.

Johnny Depp: Drunk and Disoriented at Film Fest Appearance?

Rumors of Johnny Depp getting drunk (or drunker than usual) before public appearances have been circulating for months now, and the pics of Depp at last weekend’s Palm Springs International Film Festival are unlikely to quash the speculation:

“He was very friendly but almost unrecognizable!” one onlooker told Radar Online. “He looked to have put on a good 30 pounds at least.”

“His hair was a greasy mess, and his teeth were yellowed too. It was pretty shocking. He looked more like Marlon Brando than Johnny Depp!”

Apparently, it wasn’t just Depp’s appearance that had attendees worried, as the 52-year-old’s behavior was strange even by the lofty standards he’s set throughout his career.

Sources say Depp careened from table to table making small talk throughout the evening, but had little to say when he took the stage to accept an award.

“During the dinner, he went over to Christian Bale’s table and squatted on the floor talking to him,” said one witness, who adds that the actor wasn’t nearly so chatty during his acceptance speech:

“He kind of mumbled, ‘How was the beef?’ He seemed really confused and rambling and then just ended abruptly by saying ‘It’s over with, that’s it,’ before just walking off. People were kind of looking at each other like, ‘What just happened?’ It was bizarre.”

Rumors that Depp’s drinking is getting out of hand began when the actor gave a clearly inebriated speech at last year’s Hollywood Film Awards. 

Since then, there have been reports of Depp’s drinking is driving Amber Heard away after less than a year of marriage.

We doubt that, as she usually looks pretty happy by his side on the red carpet…and we kinda doubt that she’s that good an actress 

Plus, we imagine the woman knew what she was getting into when she exchanged vows with a wobbly Captain Jack on a remote island in the Pacific.

Depp’s latest appearances are part of his awards season push for Black Mass, which despite its title, is not a documentary about Johnny’s liver.

Kaley Cuoco Gets Drunk, Plays With Fire, Dogs

It"s been three months since Kaley Cuoco filed for divorce from Ryan Sweeting, and it looks like the Big Bang Theory star is having no trouble moving on from her brief, disastrous marriage.

There are rumors that Kaley is dating Paul Blackthorne, and she"s already gushed about all the support she"s receiving from her family, friends and fans.

But we get the feeling that what"s really pulling her through is the powerful coping combo of booze and animals.

Based on her Instagram, it seems Kaley has been doing some post-divorce pet collecting and spending plenty of time knocking back vino with her BFFs.

We approve. And we"re happy to see her dual passions come together in the hilarious Instagram video below.

In the clip (which Kaley admits that she doesn"t remember filming), Ms. Cuoco can be seen using a grill lighter to "knight" her original pooch, Norman.

Waving flames around near an animal just while you"re sh-tfaced probably isn"t the best idea, but give the woman abreak she just got divorced!

Also, Norman doesn"t seem to mind, and based on the look on his face, we"re guessing he"s gotten accustomed to this sort of thing over the past few weeks.

Kaley"s transformation from boring newlywed to hard-partying divorcee is complete. And we couldn"t be happier about it.

Johnny Depp: Drunk at Amber Heard"s Movie Premiere?

It"s been a while since we last saw Drunk Depp. Sadly, we get the feeling Amber Heard can"t say the same.

The world first began to suspect that Johnny was hitting the bottle a bit too hard when Depp slurred his way through a speech at the Hollywood Film Awards last year.

Since then, there have been rumors of Johnny"s drinking driving Amber Heard away, but the 29-year-old actress has stuck by his side.

That"s not to say she doesn"t find it a but embarrassing when hard-partying Johnny shows up to one of her work functions visibly sloshed.

Johnny accompanied Amber to last night"s premiere of The Danish Girl – the awards-baity drama starring Eddie Redmayne and Alicia Vikander in which Heard has a small supporting role.

He seemed happy to play a supporting role of his own, taking a backseat to Amber on the red carpet. Unfortunately, when he spoke to E! News about his marriage, Johnny also appeared to have done a bit of pre-gaming before the evening"s main event.

“We connect on a lot of levels but the first things that really got me was she’s an aficionado of the blues," Depp gushed. "I would play a song, some old obscure blues song and she knew what it was.”

"She’s very very literate. She’s a voracious reader as I have been so we connected on that as well. And she’s kind of brilliant. I’m a lucky man”

Kind words. Unfortunately, it sounds like Johnny ralphed all over the alligator loafers he bought at Hunter S. Thompson"s estate sale as soon as the camera switched off.